Unlucky Arthur

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A travelling salesman is touring an area in deepest rural Wales, and stays the night at a farmhouse. After a fine meal with the farmer, the salesman turns to his kind host and asks if there’s any possibility of renting some ‘companionship’ for the evening.

‘Well,’ mulls the farmer. ‘I’m afraid there’s not many women around here like that. But there’s always Arthur …’

‘Oh?’ says the salesman, intrigued. ‘How much does he charge?’ ‘

It’ll cost you £10,’ comes the reply.

The salesman thinks about this. ‘Seems a bit expensive,’ he says.

‘Well,’ says the farmer, ‘The local magistrate takes out £4 because he doesn’t approve of that sort of thing.’

‘So that’s £4 for him and £6 for Arthur?’ says the salesman. The farmer shakes his head.

‘No, the local constable also takes £4 because he doesn’t approve of that sort of thing.’

‘Christ,’ says the salesman. ‘So the magistrate gets £4, the bobby £4 – that only leaves £2 for Arthur?’

'No – we have to pay Gareth and Dai to hold him down,’ says the farmer. ‘You see, Arthur doesn’t approve of that sort of thing either.’

But by the grace of God I am what I am (Sed gratia Dei sum id quod sum)

'No – we have to pay Gareth and Dai to hold him down,’ says the farmer. ‘You see, Arthur doesn’t approve of that sort of thing either.’
being Welsh, i am assumming Arthur is a sheep..?

being Welsh, i am assumming Arthur is a sheep..?Welsh?

No, but if I don't mind upsetting the Welsh. Wouldn't want to cast aspersions about the goings on of rural America or Scotland....

Welsh?

No, but if I don't mind upsetting the Welsh. Wouldn't want to cast aspersions about the goings on of rural America or Scotland....
Scotland has its fair share of sheep shaggers too, i'll give you a tip...

get them close to a cliff, i have heard the push back harder...

Scotland has its fair share of sheep shaggers too, i'll give you a tip...

get them close to a cliff, i have heard the push back harder...
I hate giving a Scotsman sheep shagging tips , but ...... NO, No, No !!! What you do is what is practiced in America. Put the hind legs in your fishing waders and push them towards a pond . That way , not only do they push back, but they get nice and wet.

I hate giving a Scotsman sheep shagging tips , but ...... NO, No, No !!! What you do is what is practiced in America. Put the hind legs in your fishing waders and push them towards a pond . That way , not only do they push back, but they get nice and wet.
What's sad is that a Scotsman new this. But it's all good... there was a town near the city I grew up that had the motto: Prineville: where the men are men and the sheep are nervous!