Smurf McBrowse
Off to Scotland to see the sites we go, myself, my lover,( who has thankfully left his three kids in
a local kennel so we could spend some QT together) and our 300lb Vietnamese potbellied pig named
"LoveRoid". And wee thought "where better for us to go on vacation than a country where the men wear
skirts with nothing underneath?", so off wee went on our scottish adventure. We'd heard tails of the
Highlads", and Twon' and myself like manly vacations. The 9 week long train ride from the USA was
grueling to say the least, butt that's what happens when you *fly Ebay* on a budget. I'd tell you
more, butt I was pretty drunk and don't remember much. The pics from that part of the trip are, um,
let's just say NOT rated for the web, and those were MIDGETS, not children. So as wee arrive we head
for the nearest pub to freshen up a bit after our long ride, and at this wee hour (8AM) we need some
refreshment. Seventy Tartan Ales later and it's closing time, or "sheepie chasing time" as the
locals called it, which puzzled me (Twon' had long since went home and crashed with some cute Scotty
who looked like MelGibson) since nobody'd yet answered my question on what they do when they catch
them, butt I figured it must be a good recipe for leg of lamb since their eyes all glowed fiendishly
and they drooled uncontrolably. So oft into the night I went with my new-found scottish friends,
into the cold, grey mist of the scottish moors as my friends led the way calling "here lil'
lovebunnys, here lil' cuties" leading by the light of their lanterns. Finally, after miles of
walking (drinking shots of scotch single malt with my Tartan Ales) they stood still, and then
extinguished the lights and said to be very quiet now as wee'd sneek up on 'em. The next thing I
knew, all hell breaks loose! I hear shrieking that'd scare the devil himself and I could feel bodies
rushing by me in the dark. The next thing I knew I felt a cold nose unner my kilt, and the most
pleasureable thing happened, as I <snip perversions too sick even for RR>. And that my friends is
how I, Smurf McSheepieShagger spent my nights on vacation studying, analyzing, and typing (must've,
cause my right wrist sure is sore, butt I lost the transcripts somewhere) butt DEFENIATELY NOT
participating in "sheepie-delights".
P.S. For Sale: 6 pairs of slightly used, imported boots just like the prince wears. Smell like lamb
chops, and have small white stains, but otherwise are pristine. Make offer. SM
a local kennel so we could spend some QT together) and our 300lb Vietnamese potbellied pig named
"LoveRoid". And wee thought "where better for us to go on vacation than a country where the men wear
skirts with nothing underneath?", so off wee went on our scottish adventure. We'd heard tails of the
Highlads", and Twon' and myself like manly vacations. The 9 week long train ride from the USA was
grueling to say the least, butt that's what happens when you *fly Ebay* on a budget. I'd tell you
more, butt I was pretty drunk and don't remember much. The pics from that part of the trip are, um,
let's just say NOT rated for the web, and those were MIDGETS, not children. So as wee arrive we head
for the nearest pub to freshen up a bit after our long ride, and at this wee hour (8AM) we need some
refreshment. Seventy Tartan Ales later and it's closing time, or "sheepie chasing time" as the
locals called it, which puzzled me (Twon' had long since went home and crashed with some cute Scotty
who looked like MelGibson) since nobody'd yet answered my question on what they do when they catch
them, butt I figured it must be a good recipe for leg of lamb since their eyes all glowed fiendishly
and they drooled uncontrolably. So oft into the night I went with my new-found scottish friends,
into the cold, grey mist of the scottish moors as my friends led the way calling "here lil'
lovebunnys, here lil' cuties" leading by the light of their lanterns. Finally, after miles of
walking (drinking shots of scotch single malt with my Tartan Ales) they stood still, and then
extinguished the lights and said to be very quiet now as wee'd sneek up on 'em. The next thing I
knew, all hell breaks loose! I hear shrieking that'd scare the devil himself and I could feel bodies
rushing by me in the dark. The next thing I knew I felt a cold nose unner my kilt, and the most
pleasureable thing happened, as I <snip perversions too sick even for RR>. And that my friends is
how I, Smurf McSheepieShagger spent my nights on vacation studying, analyzing, and typing (must've,
cause my right wrist sure is sore, butt I lost the transcripts somewhere) butt DEFENIATELY NOT
participating in "sheepie-delights".
P.S. For Sale: 6 pairs of slightly used, imported boots just like the prince wears. Smell like lamb
chops, and have small white stains, but otherwise are pristine. Make offer. SM
