FAT workmates

I work in an office. Goes without saying, a lot of the staff here dont understand lycra and exercise as the last time they did any exercise was primary school egg & spoon race. Obesity Rules.
I make an effort to avoid them seeing me in my lycra.
Cant really say much to them when they make stupid comments, but I'd like to say:
1. you're jealous, you only have enough energy to move between the couch and fridge
2. you havent seen your belly button in 10 years
etc etc
i will cause unnecessary anguish and trouble for me :-(((
I need some good comebacks !!!

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"...too old to be riding a bike..." my former workmates used to say. Screw them. I don't judge people for their lack of interest in exercise. So don't judge me.

How about "HTFU fatso".

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Custom Training Plans -- cyclecoach.com -- My Blog -- Power Meter Hire in Australia

Fatty jokes would definitely get me in trouble. I find that deflecting their quips and turning the opportunity into a candid and serious conversation about health tends to shut them up and make them avoid me like the Messenger of Death.

I mean, c'mon....don't shoot the messenger.

Everyone is afraid of me at work, so I have no answer for you...

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-Meek
"Some people train to look pretty. I just train so I can be the strongest man there is. And then again, I'm already pretty." -Magnus Samuelsson

I almost feel like the fat one in my office and I train 6 days a week. I am probably leaner than most, but since I am a former competitive bodybuilder I look thick (fat) in my work clothes standing next to the other cyclists in the office.

Amazingly in my small office just about everyone looks in shape. One lady is a very good triathlete, another guy is a Cat3, but I'm just a bloated club rider

The other few are pretty active in general.

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You have it easy. You don't have to put any money into a 401K because you'll be dead before you are sixty.

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"You are like the wind and I like the lion. You form the tempest. The sand stings my eyes and the ground is parched. I roar in defiance but you do not hear. But between us there is a difference. I, like the lion, must remain in my place. While you like the wind will never know yours." -- Mulay Hamid El Raisuli, Lord of the Riff, Sultan to the Berbers, Last of the Barbary Pirates

Felt Rider is the ****. Period (former Mr USA contestant).

My greatest accomplishment was closing the Captains of Crush #3 once....once (see Johnny Dangerously). Can do the #2 10-15 reps on good day.

Felt Rider rules (I was a former wannabe bodybuilder...shoulda taken roids...)

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-Meek
"Some people train to look pretty. I just train so I can be the strongest man there is. And then again, I'm already pretty." -Magnus Samuelsson

Bulk up.

I've actually lost significant muscle up top and people are still scared of me, must be the 'look'....

Got a great boost the other day crushing a "Trek Madone 5.9" rider who belittled me and my steed before the ass-whooping...

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-Meek
"Some people train to look pretty. I just train so I can be the strongest man there is. And then again, I'm already pretty." -Magnus Samuelsson

They found him in a ditch a little ways down the road...

Kidding.

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-Meek
"Some people train to look pretty. I just train so I can be the strongest man there is. And then again, I'm already pretty." -Magnus Samuelsson

I wish, but it was Coastal USA that I won in my class.
I think I would have been destroyed at the USA.

I think my wife rules at the house. She seems to know if I leave a dirty dish in the sink or drink milk straight out of the jug even if she happens to be in a different room. She runs a tight ship.

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Steve,

i hear ya. my father-in-law calls me "Mr Speedo", or "Captain Spandex" whenever i see him, and my co-workers say "Here he comes in his superman outfit". I won't even go into the whole shaving of the legs comments.

It just goes with the culture of busting balls, but believe me, underneath, most people,envy and admire the commitment it takes to commute/ride like we all do. And trust me, if it's the fatties who are giving you the lame comments....rest assured, they're driving home only to get there and be more miserable than you could imagine. brush it off. if you try to get them with a sharp comeback, they know they've got you irritated which drops you to their level. When i first started commuting into work, i felt the same way about being seen in my bike outfits...and i work in a teaching hospital and have to trapse through the halls.

Sometimes, I'll just say something stupid like "oh, you guys didn't get the email...this is the new work uniform". or " i robbed some guy of his bike on the way" etc. That way they know i don't care, but i don't come off like a **** trying to insult them. In the end, the only person's opinion that really matters is yours.

6000K's of commuting so far this year and i'm still showing up everyday with my spandex!

-Mike

Whenever any fat ass comments badly about cycling or spandex or the like I always ask them how many times they have been layed in the past month.

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Dope,when training and talent just aren't enough.

If you closed a No. 3, then that is a big accomplishment in its own right and you should get it certified on the website. There are less than 150 guys ever, many of them strong men, that can close a no 3. I train with the No. 1 and can close the No 2 for a rep or two. I am finding that switching to kettlebells is improving hand strength, but my hands do look like a ditch diggers with thick callouses. Rings and pullups also seem to help. I have relatively small hands so the grippers are tough in terms of getting the same leverage a larger guy can get on them, but I keep working. I also can't say that resistance training does much for me on the bike. good luck. I will look for you on the CoC Wall of fame.

Listen, success in bodybuilding does translate directly in "ruling." Look how Arnold parlayed the Mr. Universe to the Governor's mansion. Also, starring in "Predator" would have helped-- Arnold and Jesse Ventura both became governors.

Your wife's issues are mutually inconsistent. Obviously, drinking directly from the jug eliminates the need for you to dirty a glass which would just end up in the sink anyway. She should praise you for saving energy and eliminating waste. Now if you do what I do, and drink from the jug and then leave the jug on top of the fridge until it spoils (because you forgot about it while you eat leftovers while standing in the fridge doorway) then maybe she has a legitimate gripe. Leaving your grazing fork directly in the leftovers in the fridge you just emptied is also a nice touch. And don't forget leaving about an ounce of milk in the jug in the fridge also keeps wives honest. But more appropriately, mix your wet riding clothes in with her very expensive clothes in the laundry basket until the whole basket ripens, your wife will know that you really rule the roost. Or better yet, switch a load of laundry, take your own bib shorts and jerseys out to line dry, but then throw your wife's delicate lingere in a HIGH/COTTON setting in the dryer for about 50 minutes. She will know very quickly, who's really running her world.

If you train wives in this fashion, they will really apreciate a nice gesture like leaving a dish in the sink as opposed to under the couch where a less courteous husband leaves it.

I guess we know who wears the HTFU bracelet in that household.

Which CoC number corresponds to the resistance of a puny-man's neck?