Announcement (Off Topic: Humor)

*clears throat*

I'd like to make an unimportant off topic announcement...

As we all know, today is St. Patrick's Day...

Or rather yesterday was...

Many people enjoy St Patrick's day... especially
Americans...

Some people don't...

Not that it matters to anyone much...

But, some people have chosen to use an earlier post on
this message board as a forum to spout off various
political agendas, which have nothing to do with the sport
of swimming.

Not that that matters much...

Now for myself... I like pie... and sometimes ice cream...

Sometimes, I even like pie with ice cream...

Now my friend Bob... he likes kiwi fruit... and
avocados... ick!

Fact: avocados are green...

I don't like avocados...

Not that that matters much...

Limes are green. They are also sour...

Limes are good with beer... Mexican Beer...

Now, at five thirty this morning the garbage man picked up
my trash...

He makes a lot of noise... which wakes me up...

Not that that matters much...

Red is compliment color of Green...

Fact: These two colors are found on traffic lights...

Not that that matters much...

Did you that somewhere in Inner Mongolia a man is drinking
mare's milk? In a tent?

The Discovery Channel is showing a documentary on it...

It's very interesting...

Television can be educational...

Most of the time it's not...

Ever watch "Survivor"?

Not that that matters much...

I think there should be a law passed requiring that
baboons and chimps should be required to wear hair pieces
on their arsses...

There's nothing worse that bald baboon ****...

Not that that it matters much...

What if the sky were green and the sea was yellow?

Did someone pee in the pool again?

What about birth control for dogs?

Someday there'll be a spam message advertising this...
probably...

My feet hurt...

Did you know that on a tube of Preparation H it says "Do not
take orally"?

That's weird... I wonder who swallowed a whole tube before
they realized their hemorrhoids were not going away any
time soon...

I wonder if he had to eat through a straw...

You know what they say... "Whistle while you work"

Not that it matters much...

Hey, you guys want to here a dirty story?

A horse fell in the mud...

Now, I'll tell you a clean story...

The horse took a bath...

I hope, I've made my point...

This is the last... party political... argumentative... off
topic... election

nonaligned... politically correct... post liberal-
conservative... labor-whig... feminist message I'm posting
this year. (seriously)

Should you wish to discuss this topic further... please
forward all and any messages to your own e-mail address...
print it out... and shove it up your...

As usually, I've written to long a message. So, I'll
stop now...

Thank you... and Good Night!