Being the only girl on group rides

Pedalsgoaround

Do any of you girls feel somewhat out of place or out of the rules of etiquette from being the only girl on some group rides?

I do at times, but in order to ride competitive and longer rides I like to ride with the group but no women show up. It bothers my husband some but he understands that I need to inorder to go that extra mile. I ride with him some (more latley) but he is slower and does not do as many miles as I do. Also he does not like group rides and not a people person. I try to encourage two of my friend to ride but they ride even slower.

I just wonder if some of you ladies encounter this problem of being the only woman: I live out from the city so rarely there are woman that rides with our group. Also does the men think of us as odd balls, or look at us in another way? I am committed in marriage but also in my athletic abilities.

ausgirl

Back when i started cycling, i was often the only girl to show up on the harder rides. It's changed in the last few years though, with more women in my area getting into the sport.

The guys often do treat a woman a bit differently in ways that are hard to define, but you often aren't treated the same as they treat the other guys. Normally, I found the guys to be quite polite and friendly though. I think it might be to do with the differences in what they see as acceptable behaviour and conversation in an all male group, compared with when a female is around. Sometimes if you ride with them long enough, you can become just one of them. A lot of guys end up respecting a woman who can hold her own with them.

What the guys in your group think though, I can't say. In the end it will all come down to individual personalities as to how the guys treat you and whether or not they accept you. Do the rides you have to for your training, but don't put up with being poorly treated. If you can become friends with one of the guys in the group, that might help too.

Pedalsgoaround

It bothers me more so because my husband will remark he understands but then makes lewd comments that the guys are looking at my a$$, which I do not think on those terms I know he could come along but will not. The guys seem to treat me well. Sure some look at me “What are you doing here”, ”Are you going to slow us down”, when I ride with I call the more elite group (younger 25-40): which are amazed to find out I am 45 and can hold my own –not at the back, but certainly not at the front.

Even though there are many that are friendly.



If any guys are reading this what is your opinions?

What to you think of woman joining along to ride, or if your wife rides with a bunch of you guys?

Or do any of you woman have trouble with your significant others about you riding with guys?

Ullefan

I'm all for it, being straight, I'd much rather women join the group, those guys can get horny on the bike.

ausgirl

Honestly, I haven't had any serious long-term relationships in recent years so it hasn't been an issue for me.

As for your husband saying that the guys are looking at your a$$ - well, the guys don't really have any ways around that when you're in front of them, do they?! Even if the guys look at you, how is that much different from guys looking at you when you are doing any other activity? Apart from the lycra that is.

My suggestion would be to keep looking for a female cyclist to join the group.

flapsupcleanup

I think it's all about your attitude, whether you're a man or woman. If you dont show up with a chip on your shoulder, if you're friendly and if you hold your line in the group pretty much anyone will be glad to have you around.

Eden

I haven't really done a lot of group riding with only guys without my hubby around, but I do have a riding buddy that is a man. My husband is totally secure with the idea that I would not cheat on him, so he doesn't have any problems with it. Somehow I think he would be flattered more than jealous to know that other men were looking at me....
I do go out with a women's group, but even though I may not be the speediest person around they don't usually challenge me enough to ride exclusively with them. If you want to be better/faster you really do need to ride with people who are faster than you.

Ullefan

Don't worry, no man would ever look at you.

Eden

Perhaps, but being already married to a great man I don't have to worry so much about that now do I. At least I'm not some sad little boy who has to cruise the women's forums being an a$$hole to get my kicks. Get a life.

Ullefan

At least i'm not some sad woman trying to make it in a man's sport.

Eden

What makes you think that I have any aspirations to compete with men? I'm a pretty realistic person and at 5' tall 103 lbs I am not going to develop the kind of power that it would take to compete with a 6' 160 lb man. I enjoy riding with guys because they offer a challenge and if I am not challenged I will never improve. By your logic it would be better for all women to just sit on the couch and get fat, because the only reason to be fit is to beat men and we can't beat men so why bother. Personally I enjoy being physically fit because it makes me feel good. If I want competition I will compete with other women.

Ullefan

You're right, I do come on the woman's forum to get my kicks, that's all.

Pedalsgoaround

I was talking about this with my husband and he told me it does not bother him, actually he thought it is neat that I can keep up with the guys. As for his remarks, he is also just a man, I then remark what Ullefan said about getting “H” on a bike seat, and we had a good laugh. He does understand that in order to go fast I need to go with a fast group. I do feel that I have a good attitude and like I said most of the guy treat me as another rider. One guy told me he would like to find a girlfriend to ride with (knowing that I was married), I told him I would like to find one also that rides as long and same pace, so when he does I want to ride with her also



Thanks for all your input, it is all helpful.