This is great, a forum for dopers!
That "Use or lose" **** as justification is for wimps that spend their idle time watching American Idol and jerking off.
They should just acknowledge they're doing it for attention, maybe their mommies will let them crawl back inside...but only when they stop doping, too big otherwise LOL
We should round up the pro atheletes and auction off their foreheads as ad space for the pharmacutical companies. Then we can establish leagues and orgs that are strictly for the freaks and ego driven needymommas among us. DOPE ONLY COMPETITION! You know FOX would pick it up, and people would watch in order to have a good laugh when one of them takes a header in a sprint due to a heart attack! Then FOX could interview the "atheletes" afterwards and get all sorts of hilarious footage!
Announcer:"SO, Dicknose, what was your plan out on the track today?"
Doper: "Well I was going to give it a 127% according to my charts, but we saw that Dicknose2 in lane seven was amping a little higher than expected, so we uppe dit to 134%"
Announcer: "Then how on earth did you lose the race, with so much technolog you don't understand coursing through you arteries?"
[pause while Dicknose looks up many words his coach hadn't warned him would be in the interview]
Dicknose: "Uhhhm well, I went too high on some of the meds, and one of the sideeffects is an erection. I could have won if it weren't for that, it was embarrassing, racing with an erection, plus it slowed me down somewhat, aerodynamick ally and all, these shorts are skin tight for a reason.
Announcer: ".....Really? I....I don't know what to say,.. to be honest I didn't notice...but I was watching uh, the race"
Dicknose: "Yeah, it sucks, it takes like 6 hours for it to go away"
Announcer: "...Are you one of those dopers that can't control anger well anymore?"
Dicknose: "No way, I love my public! dude I'd never hurt no one, luv ya man"
Announcer: " Ahh good, I asked because, well, to be frank, you're still wearing your racing shorts and..well, you don't have an erection."
Dicknose: " Dude it's MASSIVE, I even feel stupid cause the blood aint in my brain like coach said"
Announcer: "Really?...I just don't see it, ummm not that I'm looking to close."
Dicknose: "Aww it's cool, I'm proud of my body, wanna see?"
Announcer: "NO, aww for the love of god, don't!"
Dicknose: (pulling down shorts) "See? Massiv..whatdafuk? where'd it go....oh my" (falls to the floor, crying) "THEY BLEW IT UP! THE MANIACS THEY BLEW IT UP!" [ coach arrives, kicks Dicknose and reminds him of the .0003 gain when he stopped using an athletic cup, has Cicknose hauled away ]
Announcer: " So uhh, coach killyall, uhhh any comment on tonights performance, must've been a disappointment to lose to a guy without as much juice on tap"
Coach: " yer damn right it was, if he loses again I'll cut him from the team and get my fingernail clippers out and take whatever he's got left between his legs, sonofabinch cut the ratings from our veiwing area in half losing that way!" It's no excuse, having an erection shouldn't stop any of MY atheletes from performing to MY fullest, if I thought that sonofabinch could even GET an erection I'dve taken care of it before the race!" [walks off cursing]
Announcer: " There you have it folks, Dicknose Notaman, once the undisputed champion of the Freak Division Class Racing TV organization has taken a nosedive right in the middle of the season. Next time he'll remember something every 13 year old knows..carry a book with you at all times. Not only can it cover your erection, but it makes you look smart too!"
That "Use or lose" **** as justification is for wimps that spend their idle time watching American Idol and jerking off.
They should just acknowledge they're doing it for attention, maybe their mommies will let them crawl back inside...but only when they stop doping, too big otherwise LOL
We should round up the pro atheletes and auction off their foreheads as ad space for the pharmacutical companies. Then we can establish leagues and orgs that are strictly for the freaks and ego driven needymommas among us. DOPE ONLY COMPETITION! You know FOX would pick it up, and people would watch in order to have a good laugh when one of them takes a header in a sprint due to a heart attack! Then FOX could interview the "atheletes" afterwards and get all sorts of hilarious footage!
Announcer:"SO, Dicknose, what was your plan out on the track today?"
Doper: "Well I was going to give it a 127% according to my charts, but we saw that Dicknose2 in lane seven was amping a little higher than expected, so we uppe dit to 134%"
Announcer: "Then how on earth did you lose the race, with so much technolog you don't understand coursing through you arteries?"
[pause while Dicknose looks up many words his coach hadn't warned him would be in the interview]
Dicknose: "Uhhhm well, I went too high on some of the meds, and one of the sideeffects is an erection. I could have won if it weren't for that, it was embarrassing, racing with an erection, plus it slowed me down somewhat, aerodynamick ally and all, these shorts are skin tight for a reason.
Announcer: ".....Really? I....I don't know what to say,.. to be honest I didn't notice...but I was watching uh, the race"
Dicknose: "Yeah, it sucks, it takes like 6 hours for it to go away"
Announcer: "...Are you one of those dopers that can't control anger well anymore?"
Dicknose: "No way, I love my public! dude I'd never hurt no one, luv ya man"
Announcer: " Ahh good, I asked because, well, to be frank, you're still wearing your racing shorts and..well, you don't have an erection."
Dicknose: " Dude it's MASSIVE, I even feel stupid cause the blood aint in my brain like coach said"
Announcer: "Really?...I just don't see it, ummm not that I'm looking to close."
Dicknose: "Aww it's cool, I'm proud of my body, wanna see?"
Announcer: "NO, aww for the love of god, don't!"
Dicknose: (pulling down shorts) "See? Massiv..whatdafuk? where'd it go....oh my" (falls to the floor, crying) "THEY BLEW IT UP! THE MANIACS THEY BLEW IT UP!" [ coach arrives, kicks Dicknose and reminds him of the .0003 gain when he stopped using an athletic cup, has Cicknose hauled away ]
Announcer: " So uhh, coach killyall, uhhh any comment on tonights performance, must've been a disappointment to lose to a guy without as much juice on tap"
Coach: " yer damn right it was, if he loses again I'll cut him from the team and get my fingernail clippers out and take whatever he's got left between his legs, sonofabinch cut the ratings from our veiwing area in half losing that way!" It's no excuse, having an erection shouldn't stop any of MY atheletes from performing to MY fullest, if I thought that sonofabinch could even GET an erection I'dve taken care of it before the race!" [walks off cursing]
Announcer: " There you have it folks, Dicknose Notaman, once the undisputed champion of the Freak Division Class Racing TV organization has taken a nosedive right in the middle of the season. Next time he'll remember something every 13 year old knows..carry a book with you at all times. Not only can it cover your erection, but it makes you look smart too!"
