Binge nad purge



D

Dave Smith

Guest
My sister in law was here for a visit for a few days and
brought her newly acquired husband's grand daughter who had
been staying with them die to some family problems. I
contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
revise my thinking on that expression. This girl turned out
to have a hearty appetite. We had a snack of crackers with
pate and with cream cheese and hot pepper jelly for them
when they arrived. I was hoping that this little 16 year
old would not spoil her appetite.

I made a pretty good dinner the first night, Mango Chicken.
She loved it and had seconds of it, along with more rice and
vegetables. She enjoyed the butterscotch pie dessert enough
to have seconds. When bed time came along I noticed traces
of vomit in the toilet. I thought maybe she had just
overdone it, and combined with the home problem she had some
gastric distress.

She had a hearty breakfast. When I got down to the kitchen
in the morning she was eating Shredded Wheat. It turned out
that she had been up in the middle of the night for a bowl
of the stuff too. My wife made her some hot cocoas and then
she had two bowls of oatmeal porridge and bacon and eggs.
They went out for the day and my wife and I found more
traces of vomiting.

For dinner I cooked Chicken Chasseur, which turned out
really nicely. She had a heart helping of it on top of a
bed of noodles, and then seconds. She had a seconds of
dessert. That night there was more traces of her having
heaved her dinner.

At breakfast the next morning she had a bowl of Shredded
Wheat and then some more while I made the porridge. Once
again, she had two bowls of porridge and cocoa. By this
point I was a little more aware of the cycle. Sure enough ,
upstairs right after the meal to "shower" . This time I
realize that while I am hearing the sound of the shower
running, the toilet flushes.

I didn't want to stick my nose where it didn't belong but I
thought that I should mention something to SiL. She said
that she had heard something about the grand daughter having
a problem, but had no evidence of it.

That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
symbol to have an eating disorder these days.
 
D

Dwayne

Guest
I don't remember the correct term for it, but it seems like she is on some
sort of a diet where she eats all she wants and then throws it up so she
wont put on weight. It is very dangerous to her health and if it is the
same thing I heard about, she could die from it.

I would suggest asking someone to confirm my idea and then tell everyone
concerned so she can get some help.

Dwayne

"Dave Smith" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> My sister in law was here for a visit for a few days and
> brought her newly acquired husband's grand daughter who had
> been staying with them die to some family problems. I
> contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
> was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
> worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
> revise my thinking on that expression. This girl turned out
> to have a hearty appetite. We had a snack of crackers with
> pate and with cream cheese and hot pepper jelly for them
> when they arrived. I was hoping that this little 16 year
> old would not spoil her appetite.
>
> I made a pretty good dinner the first night, Mango Chicken.
> She loved it and had seconds of it, along with more rice and
> vegetables. She enjoyed the butterscotch pie dessert enough
> to have seconds. When bed time came along I noticed traces
> of vomit in the toilet. I thought maybe she had just
> overdone it, and combined with the home problem she had some
> gastric distress.
>
> She had a hearty breakfast. When I got down to the kitchen
> in the morning she was eating Shredded Wheat. It turned out
> that she had been up in the middle of the night for a bowl
> of the stuff too. My wife made her some hot cocoas and then
> she had two bowls of oatmeal porridge and bacon and eggs.
> They went out for the day and my wife and I found more
> traces of vomiting.
>
> For dinner I cooked Chicken Chasseur, which turned out
> really nicely. She had a heart helping of it on top of a
> bed of noodles, and then seconds. She had a seconds of
> dessert. That night there was more traces of her having
> heaved her dinner.
>
> At breakfast the next morning she had a bowl of Shredded
> Wheat and then some more while I made the porridge. Once
> again, she had two bowls of porridge and cocoa. By this
> point I was a little more aware of the cycle. Sure enough ,
> upstairs right after the meal to "shower" . This time I
> realize that while I am hearing the sound of the shower
> running, the toilet flushes.
>
> I didn't want to stick my nose where it didn't belong but I
> thought that I should mention something to SiL. She said
> that she had heard something about the grand daughter having
> a problem, but had no evidence of it.
>
> That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
> disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
> to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
> girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
> symbol to have an eating disorder these days.
>
>
>
>
 
N

Nancy Young

Guest
"Dwayne" <[email protected]> wrote

>I don't remember the correct term for it, but it seems like she is on some
>sort of a diet where she eats all she wants and then throws it up so she
>wont put on weight. It is very dangerous to her health and if it is the
>same thing I heard about, she could die from it.


Bulimia. A very bad thing.

> I would suggest asking someone to confirm my idea and then tell everyone
> concerned so she can get some help.


Agreed, if she'll take it.

> Dave Smith wrote:


>> That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
>> disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
>> to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
>> girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
>> symbol to have an eating disorder these days.


That kind of stuff has been around long as I can remember,
and long before I knew there was a name for it.

nancy
 
C

Chris

Guest
"Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]
>
> "Dwayne" <[email protected]> wrote
>
>>I don't remember the correct term for it, but it seems like she is on some
>>sort of a diet where she eats all she wants and then throws it up so she
>>wont put on weight. It is very dangerous to her health and if it is the
>>same thing I heard about, she could die from it.

>
> Bulimia. A very bad thing.
>
>> I would suggest asking someone to confirm my idea and then tell everyone
>> concerned so she can get some help.

>
> Agreed, if she'll take it.
>


Right. I had a friend in college who had bulemia. She was pretty good at
hiding it, but eventually, her closest group of friends caught on (I think
it's one of those deals where deep down, the person really wants to get
caught). They got advice from the campus health clinic, who helped them
stage an intervention. It shocked her into admitting that she had the
problem. That was 20 years ago, but I think bulemia can still be pretty
dangerous. I don't know what the correct approach to dealing with it is
these days, though.

Dave, your sister-in-law's step-granddaughter (is that what she is?) does
need help, and it will be very difficult for her to accept that she has a
problem and agree to do something about it. The girl's parents have to be
convinced that she needs help, as well. If they're in denial, they'll do
nothing. They need to contact her pediatrician for advice on exactly how to
handle this situation. It can be really tough; they have to be pretty
strong to handle this...it may be an ongoing problem that can return after
they think they've licked it (as it did with my friend....haven't heard from
her in a while but at last check, she was ok, and was able to have healthy
children, etc.). I wish that family the best.

BTW, that Mango Chicken sounds pretty good, Dave. Recipe?

Chris (no eating disorder here, except for the occasional overindulgence)
 
P

Peter Huebner

Guest
In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] says...

> contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
> was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
> worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
> revise my thinking on that expression.


Well maybe your cooking is better ?!? <g>

> That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
> disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
> to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
> girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
> symbol to have an eating disorder these days.


Bulimia is a serious disorder, akin to anorexia. Anorexia kills *a lot* of
sufferers. Bulimia ain't much better --- if nothing else she stands to lose her
teeth (!) and will damage herself in other ways. You should definitely point it
out to your SiL; if they are really lucky she'll get off it with councelling,
but ...

-P.


--
=========================================
firstname dot lastname at gmail fullstop com
 
J

Jessica V.

Guest
Dave Smith wrote:
> My sister in law was here for a visit for a few days and
> brought her newly acquired husband's grand daughter who had
> been staying with them die to some family problems. I
> contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
> was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
> worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
> revise my thinking on that expression. This girl turned out
> to have a hearty appetite. We had a snack of crackers with
> pate and with cream cheese and hot pepper jelly for them
> when they arrived. I was hoping that this little 16 year
> old would not spoil her appetite.
>
> I made a pretty good dinner the first night, Mango Chicken.
> She loved it and had seconds of it, along with more rice and
> vegetables. She enjoyed the butterscotch pie dessert enough
> to have seconds. When bed time came along I noticed traces
> of vomit in the toilet. I thought maybe she had just
> overdone it, and combined with the home problem she had some
> gastric distress.
>
> She had a hearty breakfast. When I got down to the kitchen
> in the morning she was eating Shredded Wheat. It turned out
> that she had been up in the middle of the night for a bowl
> of the stuff too. My wife made her some hot cocoas and then
> she had two bowls of oatmeal porridge and bacon and eggs.
> They went out for the day and my wife and I found more
> traces of vomiting.
>
> For dinner I cooked Chicken Chasseur, which turned out
> really nicely. She had a heart helping of it on top of a
> bed of noodles, and then seconds. She had a seconds of
> dessert. That night there was more traces of her having
> heaved her dinner.
>
> At breakfast the next morning she had a bowl of Shredded
> Wheat and then some more while I made the porridge. Once
> again, she had two bowls of porridge and cocoa. By this
> point I was a little more aware of the cycle. Sure enough ,
> upstairs right after the meal to "shower" . This time I
> realize that while I am hearing the sound of the shower
> running, the toilet flushes.
>
> I didn't want to stick my nose where it didn't belong but I
> thought that I should mention something to SiL. She said
> that she had heard something about the grand daughter having
> a problem, but had no evidence of it.
>
> That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
> disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
> to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
> girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
> symbol to have an eating disorder these days.


The girl certainly needs help. IMO a psychiatrist that specializing in
eating disorders is needed pronto. One of my very dear friends was a
bulimic in her teen years. I met her, after sucessful treatment. The
after-effects of bulimia aren't pretty, lack of essential nutrients in
the teen years wrecks havoc on the body, she has osteoperosis from that
and has lost five inches in height, has a multitude of digestive
problems and is only thirty.

When I was a teen in the early 90s I don't remember a lot of hype about
eating disorders but I certainly knew a lot of girls who did have
eating disorders.

Jessica
 
D

Dave Smith

Guest
Peter Huebner wrote:

> > contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
> > was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
> > worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
> > revise my thinking on that expression.

>
> Well maybe your cooking is better ?!? <g>


The two dinners were things I had done before but had exceptionally good results
this time :).
But it wasn't just the good food she was filling up on. She was just demonstrating
a healthy appetite for a 16 year old. It was all the other stuff, several servings
of cold cereal before we sat down to breakfast, then two bowls of oatmeal and bacon
and eggs. It just struck me odd after being told that she eats like a bird.


>
>
> > That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
> > disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
> > to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
> > girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
> > symbol to have an eating disorder these days.

>
> Bulimia is a serious disorder, akin to anorexia. Anorexia kills *a lot* of
> sufferers. Bulimia ain't much better --- if nothing else she stands to lose her
> teeth (!) and will damage herself in other ways. You should definitely point it
> out to your SiL; if they are really lucky she'll get off it with councelling,
> but ...


I did point it out to SiL and Sil brought it up (no pun intended) with the girl on
their way home. Apparently she told SiL that she found that she can keep thin by
puking. There must be some sort of void there that drives her to eating so much.

I don't know this kid very well. SiL just married the grandfather a few years ago.
I had seen her a few times at family functions. There is a screwed up family
situation. The natural grandmother has a serious bipolar disorder and her mother
is starting to show similar problems. She just got busted for a major fraud, and is
looking at jail time and multi million dollar law suits. It could be a call for
help, and I hope that she gets it. She seems like a nice kid. Certainly has a good
appetite. :)
 
D

Denny Wheeler

Guest
On Sun, 27 Nov 2005 22:15:47 -0500, Dave Smith
<[email protected]> wrote:

(Peter Huebner)
>> Bulimia is a serious disorder, akin to anorexia. Anorexia kills *a lot* of
>> sufferers. Bulimia ain't much better --- if nothing else she stands to lose her
>> teeth (!) and will damage herself in other ways. You should definitely point it
>> out to your SiL; if they are really lucky she'll get off it with councelling,
>> but ...

>
>I did point it out to SiL and Sil brought it up (no pun intended) with the girl on
>their way home. Apparently she told SiL that she found that she can keep thin by
>puking. There must be some sort of void there that drives her to eating so much.


That's what Peter and the others are talking about:
(from the American Heritage)
": 1. An eating disorder, common especially among young women of
normal or nearly normal weight, that is characterized by episodic
binge eating and followed by feelings of guilt, depression, and
self-condemnation. It is often associated with measures taken to
prevent weight gain, such as self-induced vomiting, the use of
laxatives, dieting, or fasting. "

Bulimics and anorexics are in serious need of good professional care.
This girl definitely needs help.

--
-denny-
"Do your thoughts call ahead or do they just arrive at your mouth unannounced?"

"It's come as you are, baby."

-over the hedge
 
D

Dave Smith

Guest
Julia Altshuler wrote:

>
> If a relative showed up on your doorstep who looked like she might be
> bleeding pretty badly from a gunshot wound, but you weren't sure exactly
> how serious the injury was, and maybe it wasn't that bad, you'd call an
> ambulance anyway to let someone who knows what they're doing decide if
> she needs a blood tranfusion or stitches. If it turns out you
> over-reacted and all she needed was a band-aid, so what?


Sounds good. The problem is that she is a 16 year old girl and newly acquired relative
though an the marriage of an in-law. I had a enough trouble dealing with the (over)
sensitivity of nieces over the years. I had been surprised at the amount of food she ate,
especially since she is short and slim to begin with, and after having been told that she
"eats like a bird". I thought at first that it was the rich food, and was also aware of
the situation that led to her living with her grandfather, and thought it might be a
nervous stomach.

I really didn't think it my place to confront her about bingeing and puking. I could have
been wrong about it. I considered the best course of action to be to advice SiL about
what I had noticed and suggest that there may be a problem. SiL did discuss it with her
on the drive home. The girl was embarrassed about having been found out and suggested
that she would not be welcome to visit us again. Hearing that response reinforced my
thoughts about how inappropriate it would have been for me to try to deal with it.


> Having said that, I wouldn't be too quick to jump to the conclusion that
> all the publicity about eating disorders puts the idea in young women's
> heads. That might be it in some cases, but I think it more likely that,
> like bi-polar disorder, the flu, menstrual cramps, and dyslexia, the
> illness would be there regardless of whether the sufferer had heard of
> it or not.


I like the idea of public awareness of personal issues. While some people are upset about
things like tampons and home pregnancy tests being advertised in media where young people
are likely to see them, I think that some people might otherwise never know about them.
As SiL advised the girl, binge and purge is a way for young women to try to gain some
control over their lives and their bodies, but there are much healthier ways of doing it.

FWIW... while my wife and SiL were out walking the dogs the step great niece in law and I
talked about winter activities and her dislike of cold weather. I told her that there are
several reasons for the long dally dog walk. It is good for the dogs to get the exercise
and tires them out so they behave better in the house. It is also for my wife's benefit.
The daily walks are a benefit to her back problem (Arthritis) with the added benefit of
the weight loss. I also told her about my fitness program, daily workouts at the Y, and
that I liked swimming because if I swam for 40 minutes a day I could eat as much as I
want and still lose a pound or two per week. I had told her that when I got into horse
back riding a few years ago I found it exhausting and thought it unfair to make the
horses jump with the extra weight. So I got into the fitness program, lost some weight
and that my riding improved greatly, and I don't get as tired as I used to.

The discussion was, I thought, completely neutral. There was no mention of the amount of
food that she had consumed or that I knew she had been purging it all by vomiting, and
letting him know how we can control weight and keep fit for the activities we enjoy and
not have to starve ourselves to do it.
 
T

TammyM

Guest
On 27 Nov 2005 17:51:13 -0800, "Jessica V." <[email protected]>
wrote:

>
>Dave Smith wrote:
>> My sister in law was here for a visit for a few days and
>> brought her newly acquired husband's grand daughter who had
>> been staying with them die to some family problems. I
>> contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
>> was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
>> worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
>> revise my thinking on that expression. This girl turned out
>> to have a hearty appetite. We had a snack of crackers with
>> pate and with cream cheese and hot pepper jelly for them
>> when they arrived. I was hoping that this little 16 year
>> old would not spoil her appetite.
>>
>> I made a pretty good dinner the first night, Mango Chicken.
>> She loved it and had seconds of it, along with more rice and
>> vegetables. She enjoyed the butterscotch pie dessert enough
>> to have seconds. When bed time came along I noticed traces
>> of vomit in the toilet. I thought maybe she had just
>> overdone it, and combined with the home problem she had some
>> gastric distress.
>>
>> She had a hearty breakfast. When I got down to the kitchen
>> in the morning she was eating Shredded Wheat. It turned out
>> that she had been up in the middle of the night for a bowl
>> of the stuff too. My wife made her some hot cocoas and then
>> she had two bowls of oatmeal porridge and bacon and eggs.
>> They went out for the day and my wife and I found more
>> traces of vomiting.
>>
>> For dinner I cooked Chicken Chasseur, which turned out
>> really nicely. She had a heart helping of it on top of a
>> bed of noodles, and then seconds. She had a seconds of
>> dessert. That night there was more traces of her having
>> heaved her dinner.
>>
>> At breakfast the next morning she had a bowl of Shredded
>> Wheat and then some more while I made the porridge. Once
>> again, she had two bowls of porridge and cocoa. By this
>> point I was a little more aware of the cycle. Sure enough ,
>> upstairs right after the meal to "shower" . This time I
>> realize that while I am hearing the sound of the shower
>> running, the toilet flushes.
>>
>> I didn't want to stick my nose where it didn't belong but I
>> thought that I should mention something to SiL. She said
>> that she had heard something about the grand daughter having
>> a problem, but had no evidence of it.
>>
>> That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
>> disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
>> to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
>> girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
>> symbol to have an eating disorder these days.

>
>The girl certainly needs help. IMO a psychiatrist that specializing in
>eating disorders is needed pronto. One of my very dear friends was a
>bulimic in her teen years. I met her, after sucessful treatment. The
>after-effects of bulimia aren't pretty, lack of essential nutrients in
>the teen years wrecks havoc on the body, she has osteoperosis from that
>and has lost five inches in height, has a multitude of digestive
>problems and is only thirty.
>
>When I was a teen in the early 90s I don't remember a lot of hype about
>eating disorders but I certainly knew a lot of girls who did have
>eating disorders.


Hmmm, my perception of this issue differs from yours. I was a teen in
the mid-70's, and I remember lots of info being available about eating
disorders, particularly anorexia, even then (sans internet,
obviously). But I had my own eating disorder problems then which
heightened my awareness. Karen Carpenter's death in the 80's shone
even more light on the issue. And of course, Princess Diana's bulimia
became known in the 90s. It certainly appears to be an ongoing
problem, particularly for teenage girls and young women, and the
consequences can be physically devastating. I hope this girl is able
to get help.

TammyM
 
Jessica V. wrote:
> Dave Smith wrote:
> > My sister in law was here for a visit for a few days and
> > brought her newly acquired husband's grand daughter who had
> > been staying with them die to some family problems. I
> > contacted SiL to see if the girl had any food preferences. I
> > was informed that she prefers chicken to beef, but not to
> > worry because she eats like a bird. I am going to have to
> > revise my thinking on that expression. This girl turned out
> > to have a hearty appetite. We had a snack of crackers with
> > pate and with cream cheese and hot pepper jelly for them
> > when they arrived. I was hoping that this little 16 year
> > old would not spoil her appetite.
> >
> > I made a pretty good dinner the first night, Mango Chicken.
> > She loved it and had seconds of it, along with more rice and
> > vegetables. She enjoyed the butterscotch pie dessert enough
> > to have seconds. When bed time came along I noticed traces
> > of vomit in the toilet. I thought maybe she had just
> > overdone it, and combined with the home problem she had some
> > gastric distress.
> >
> > She had a hearty breakfast. When I got down to the kitchen
> > in the morning she was eating Shredded Wheat. It turned out
> > that she had been up in the middle of the night for a bowl
> > of the stuff too. My wife made her some hot cocoas and then
> > she had two bowls of oatmeal porridge and bacon and eggs.
> > They went out for the day and my wife and I found more
> > traces of vomiting.
> >
> > For dinner I cooked Chicken Chasseur, which turned out
> > really nicely. She had a heart helping of it on top of a
> > bed of noodles, and then seconds. She had a seconds of
> > dessert. That night there was more traces of her having
> > heaved her dinner.
> >
> > At breakfast the next morning she had a bowl of Shredded
> > Wheat and then some more while I made the porridge. Once
> > again, she had two bowls of porridge and cocoa. By this
> > point I was a little more aware of the cycle. Sure enough ,
> > upstairs right after the meal to "shower" . This time I
> > realize that while I am hearing the sound of the shower
> > running, the toilet flushes.
> >
> > I didn't want to stick my nose where it didn't belong but I
> > thought that I should mention something to SiL. She said
> > that she had heard something about the grand daughter having
> > a problem, but had no evidence of it.
> >
> > That left me wondering about all the hype about eating
> > disorders. While it is nice to have public awareness, I have
> > to wonder if all the publicity has not given a lot of young
> > girls some bad ideas. It seems that it is almost a status
> > symbol to have an eating disorder these days.

>
> The girl certainly needs help. IMO a psychiatrist that specializing in
> eating disorders is needed pronto. One of my very dear friends was a
> bulimic in her teen years. I met her, after sucessful treatment. The
> after-effects of bulimia aren't pretty, lack of essential nutrients in
> the teen years wrecks havoc on the body, she has osteoperosis from that
> and has lost five inches in height, has a multitude of digestive
> problems and is only thirty.
>
> When I was a teen in the early 90s I don't remember a lot of hype about
> eating disorders but I certainly knew a lot of girls who did have
> eating disorders.


I knew of a girl in high school who died from bulimia, eventually.

She was only 19, and I believe she had a heart attack, most likely from
an electrolyte imbalance.

Sad, sad, sad.


>
> Jessica
 
D

Denny Wheeler

Guest
On Sun, 27 Nov 2005 23:25:11 -0500, Julia Altshuler
<[email protected]> wrote:

>Having said that, I wouldn't be too quick to jump to the conclusion that
>all the publicity about eating disorders puts the idea in young women's
>heads. That might be it in some cases, but I think it more likely that,
>like bi-polar disorder, the flu, menstrual cramps, and dyslexia, the
>illness would be there regardless of whether the sufferer had heard of
>it or not.


If any pub. puts eating disorders in young women (young men have 'em
too, but in much smaller numbers so far), it's the "look at how
beautiful this skinny girl is" kind.

--
-denny-
"Do your thoughts call ahead or do they just arrive at your mouth unannounced?"

"It's come as you are, baby."

-over the hedge
 
D

Dave Smith

Guest
Denny Wheeler wrote:

> If any pub. puts eating disorders in young women (young men have 'em
> too, but in much smaller numbers so far), it's the "look at how
> beautiful this skinny girl is" kind.


I just don't understand it. I hate puking, so I can't understand why anyone would
stuff themselves and then puke. I would have thought that after a while you would
associate that heavy duty eating with the unpleasant sensation of puking.

There must be some perverse ideas of self images. Skinny is not particularly
attractive IMO. Soft curves, healthy skin, nice hair, yes, but skin and bones and
pallid skin, no.
 
M

maxine in ri

Guest
On Mon, 28 Nov 2005 17:09:56 -0500, Dave Smith
<[email protected]> connected the dots and wrote:

~Denny Wheeler wrote:
~
~> If any pub. puts eating disorders in young women (young men have
'em
~> too, but in much smaller numbers so far), it's the "look at how
~> beautiful this skinny girl is" kind.
~
~I just don't understand it. I hate puking, so I can't understand why
anyone would
~stuff themselves and then puke. I would have thought that after a
while you would
~associate that heavy duty eating with the unpleasant sensation of
puking.
~
~There must be some perverse ideas of self images. Skinny is not
particularly
~attractive IMO. Soft curves, healthy skin, nice hair, yes, but skin
and bones and
~pallid skin, no.
~
Body dismorphic syndrome it's called. No matter how skinny, they see
themselves as fat. With the men, it's not knowing when they have
enough muscle mass and start to look like freaks. Often includes
steroid use, since there's only so far you can go wth exercize.

maxine in ri, who read about bulimia being a great way to lose weight,
tried it once, and wondered about the people with the drive to
continue such a disgusting practice.
 
J

Julia Altshuler

Guest
Dave Smith wrote:

> The discussion was, I thought, completely neutral. There was no mention of the amount of
> food that she had consumed or that I knew she had been purging it all by vomiting, and
> letting him know how we can control weight and keep fit for the activities we enjoy and
> not have to starve ourselves to do it.



I'm glad there were parts of your visit that were pleasant and neutral.
They are, however, irrelevant to the mental illness. If mental
illness could be "spoken" to by pointing out its irrationalities, then
it would be easy to cure. We'd all be able to tell people with
agoraphobia that there's nothing to be afraid of outside. Depressed
people would could be clapped on the back and told to cheer up and enjoy
life. Schizophrenics could have it explained that the voices they hear
aren't real. You get the idea.


The problem here is that we don't know why she's binging and purging.
The chances are good that she doesn't either. It may have something to
do with body image and control of her body. It might be something else
altogether. The point is that you need to get her to a professional who
can diagnose and treat.


I agree that confronting her would have been the wrong way to go.
Talking to sister-in-law should have worked but didn't. Now you've got
to call that proverbial ambulance. Can you find out about professionals
in her home town, make the phone calls and arrange for a first
appointment? Her own doctor might be the place to start with your
suspicions.


I wouldn't suggest sticking your nose into someone else's business to
this extent if the nature of the illness weren't so serious. If I
thought her parents weren't taking the exactly correct course of action
on any of a number of problems, I'd shrug and say the kid will turn out
O.K. anyway, but this is serious.


--Lia
 
D

Denny Wheeler

Guest
On Mon, 28 Nov 2005 17:09:56 -0500, Dave Smith
<[email protected]> wrote:

>Denny Wheeler wrote:
>
>> If any pub. puts eating disorders in young women (young men have 'em
>> too, but in much smaller numbers so far), it's the "look at how
>> beautiful this skinny girl is" kind.

>
>I just don't understand it. I hate puking, so I can't understand why anyone would
>stuff themselves and then puke. I would have thought that after a while you would
>associate that heavy duty eating with the unpleasant sensation of puking.
>
>There must be some perverse ideas of self images. Skinny is not particularly
>attractive IMO. Soft curves, healthy skin, nice hair, yes, but skin and bones and
>pallid skin, no.


Bulimics--and anorexics, they're effectively two edges of the same bad
penny--really really don't like themselves much. As Maxine said, they
always think they're fat. One of my dearest friends in all the world
is anorexic (getting over it a bit now, but it's been a many years'
battle); even when she was like 30 or more pounds underweight (and
she's *s*h*o*r*t!!) she'd try very hard to lose more.

Another delightful woman I knew (she moved away, or we'd still be
close) was anorexic--a particular thing for both of them: one
absolutely had to be ultracareful in complimenting them on their
appearance. "You look healthy"--that's right out; they hear "You're
fat." You--for just about every value of 'you'--likely know someone
who can find a negative meaning for just about anything said to 'em.
Anorexics and bulimics *will* do that--if they can find a way to hear
'you weigh too much' they will.


--
-denny-
"Do your thoughts call ahead or do they just arrive at your mouth unannounced?"

"It's come as you are, baby."

-over the hedge
 
M

Melba's Jammin'

Guest
In article <[email protected]>,
Dave Smith <[email protected]> wrote:

> Denny Wheeler wrote:
>
> > If any pub. puts eating disorders in young women (young men have
> > 'em too, but in much smaller numbers so far), it's the "look at how
> > beautiful this skinny girl is" kind.

>
> I just don't understand it. I hate puking, so I can't understand why
> anyone would stuff themselves and then puke. I would have thought
> that after a while you would associate that heavy duty eating with
> the unpleasant sensation of puking.


Logic doesn't usually enter into emotional disorders, Dave.

> There must be some perverse ideas of self images. Skinny is not
> particularly attractive IMO. Soft curves, healthy skin, nice hair,
> yes, but skin and bones and pallid skin, no.



You're not the average teen-age girl, where "looks" and "fitting in"
and not standing out in the group (unless you're dropdead beautiful) are
of paramount importance. It is skewed thinking.
And when she looks in the mirror, she doesn't see what you see when you
look at her. IMO, bulimia is a physical symptom of a psychological
disorder. What goes in her mouth (and comes out of her mouth) may well
be the ONLY thing she thinks she has any control over. I mean, if you
wanted to, who could stop you from puking? I'm sorry for her problem
and hope she will get help, one way or another. She can be doing
serious harm to her body.
--
http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 11-28-05 - Sam I Am! and Hello
 
W

Wayne Boatwright

Guest
I know this is a serious disorder, but I keep reading the subject as "Bingo
and Purge". Conjures up a whole 'nother image. :)

--
Wayne Boatwright *¿*
_____________________________________________

A chicken in every pot is a *LOT* of chicken!
 
T

tert in seattle

Guest
[email protected] writes:
>I know this is a serious disorder, but I keep reading the subject as "Bingo
>and Purge". Conjures up a whole 'nother image. :)


as does "Bingo nad purge"
 
S

Shaun aRe

Guest
"tert in seattle" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> [email protected] writes:
> >I know this is a serious disorder, but I keep reading the subject as

"Bingo
> >and Purge". Conjures up a whole 'nother image. :)

>
> as does "Bingo nad purge"




Well, most men would have to have had a nad purge before you'd get them into
a bingo hall.





Shaun aRe