Commandments of the Helmet Gods

[[email protected]]

These are what the Helmeted must obey as there truly must be an
underground
cult of helmet worshippers;
1. Be insulting and abusive to those who do not worship the helmet
gods.
2. Use threats of a standard nature "be a vegetable, drool, raise
insurance"
3. You must claim to be a medical professional whenever possible and
state that
you see scores of injured cyclists every day.
4. Discriminate against the Helmetless. Do not allow them to
participate in
group rides , races, etc.
5. Accept all words of the Helmet Prophets- Bell, Giro, safe Kids,
BHSI
6. Believe that sinning ONCE (being helmetless) will cause you to be
struck
down dead immediately.
7. As with any cult you forget your past state of non-helmethood and
lack of
facing any serious injury.
8. Donate to the helmet ministry, Bell, giro every three years or
after any
impact.
9. Must NOT encourage safe riding habits. If obeying safety rule
decreases
accidents, then the helmet cult will die.
10. The helmet gods require sacrifices. If a cyclist is taken do not
question
the helmet gods. Hold onto your faith even when logic tells you your
helmet is
not infallible.

 

[Scott Gordo]

On Jun 19, 12:40 pm, [email protected] wrote:
> These are what the Helmeted must obey as there truly must be an
> underground
> cult of helmet worshippers;
> 1. Be insulting and abusive to those who do not worship the helmet
> gods.
> 2. Use threats of a standard nature "be a vegetable, drool, raise
> insurance"
> 3. You must claim to be a medical professional whenever possible and
> state that
> you see scores of injured cyclists every day.
> 4. Discriminate against the Helmetless. Do not allow them to
> participate in
> group rides , races, etc.
> 5. Accept all words of the Helmet Prophets- Bell, Giro, safe Kids,
> BHSI
> 6. Believe that sinning ONCE (being helmetless) will cause you to be
> struck
> down dead immediately.
> 7. As with any cult you forget your past state of non-helmethood and
> lack of
> facing any serious injury.
> 8. Donate to the helmet ministry, Bell, giro every three years or
> after any
> impact.
> 9. Must NOT encourage safe riding habits. If obeying safety rule
> decreases
> accidents, then the helmet cult will die.
> 10. The helmet gods require sacrifices. If a cyclist is taken do not
> question
> the helmet gods. Hold onto your faith even when logic tells you your
> helmet is
> not infallible.

Zzzz...

/s

 

[Nigel]

<[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> These are what the Helmeted must obey as there truly must be an
> underground
> cult of helmet worshippers;
> 1. Be insulting and abusive to those who do not worship the helmet
> gods.
> 2. Use threats of a standard nature "be a vegetable, drool, raise
> insurance"
> 3. You must claim to be a medical professional whenever possible and
> state that
> you see scores of injured cyclists every day.
> 4. Discriminate against the Helmetless. Do not allow them to
> participate in
> group rides , races, etc.
> 5. Accept all words of the Helmet Prophets- Bell, Giro, safe Kids,
> BHSI
> 6. Believe that sinning ONCE (being helmetless) will cause you to be
> struck
> down dead immediately.
> 7. As with any cult you forget your past state of non-helmethood and
> lack of
> facing any serious injury.
> 8. Donate to the helmet ministry, Bell, giro every three years or
> after any
> impact.
> 9. Must NOT encourage safe riding habits. If obeying safety rule
> decreases
> accidents, then the helmet cult will die.
> 10. The helmet gods require sacrifices. If a cyclist is taken do not
> question
> the helmet gods. Hold onto your faith even when logic tells you your
> helmet is
> not infallible.
>


Yaaaaaawwwnnnnnnnn..........

 

[=?utf-8?B?4paAU2xhY2s=?=]

On Tue, 19 Jun 2007 09:40:11 -0700, <[email protected]> wrote:

> These are what the Helmeted must obey as there truly must be an
> underground
> cult of helmet worshippers;
> 1. Be insulting and abusive to those who do not worship the helmet
> gods.
> 2. Use threats of a standard nature "be a vegetable, drool, raise
> insurance"
> 3. You must claim to be a medical professional whenever possible and
> state that
> you see scores of injured cyclists every day.
> 4. Discriminate against the Helmetless. Do not allow them to
> participate in
> group rides , races, etc.
> 5. Accept all words of the Helmet Prophets- Bell, Giro, safe Kids,
> BHSI
> 6. Believe that sinning ONCE (being helmetless) will cause you to be
> struck
> down dead immediately.
> 7. As with any cult you forget your past state of non-helmethood and
> lack of
> facing any serious injury.
> 8. Donate to the helmet ministry, Bell, giro every three years or
> after any
> impact.
> 9. Must NOT encourage safe riding habits. If obeying safety rule
> decreases
> accidents, then the helmet cult will die.
> 10. The helmet gods require sacrifices. If a cyclist is taken do not
> question
> the helmet gods. Hold onto your faith even when logic tells you your
> helmet is
> not infallible.
>

11. ********
--
Slack