Crashed yesterday... (Warning "adult audience" thread)


Well-Known Member
Feb 19, 2011
So I was comming back from the thrift shop yesterday where I went to get some female underwear for a... hmmm "School project" and I was on my bike crossing the road in order to make a left and cycle home.

Whilst I was at the traffic light crossing the pedestrian crossing I was on the bike (I did not get off the bike whilst crossing but was just going super slow with one leg on the ground).

Then -WHAM- a soon to discover "Hillfolk Ho" driving a "bought from government funds for raising crops" money "Ford -**** You- Focus" bought to carry the Ho's junk around the city so she would not sweat and stink too and not just -look- like a Hillfolk ho, just tried to speed over the crossing and knocked my front wheel, I fortunately turned imidiately, rolled a bit on the ground and woke up with this:

Yep, thats my knee... With some dead blood in it...

So I just told her "just call the ****** cops". And she said "What do you want the cops for?" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I just said again just call the cops. And she goes "Why??? If you are ok "lets just leave it like that"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I told her I just wanna see whose fault it was so I can go home, and she admitted "ITS HER FAULT!"...

Then out of nowhere, a second fat ho appeared and started chatting to me (I dont think they knew eachother, maybe the Ford-ho beamed her from the Hillfolk ho - planet to "assist" her with her alien hillfolk ho technology i-****-you-phone. (also bought with government funds for raising crops).

So they started saying something that I might wanna "get some money from them" and that "I smelled like beer" (**** yeah I smelled like beer I had 2 cold ones before).

Since the police did not appear for a good 20 minutes I spent some time explaining her the "problems with her appearance", the "level of her driving skills" and the the "nature of her mentallity" in the best possible "non-sue-able" way...

Its fortunate that I had a similar event earlier this year, which kinda ended up in a full blown street "bum style" fight so due to this experience I was very "un-sue-able" for the whole duration of the event, I am proud of my self for that.

So then I just went away because the police was obviously not comming, not unless I called them another 20 times or so... and she goes in her conceiled hillfolk ho accent: "Whats your name?" So I tell her my name and I ask her for hers and she says "That its not my concern"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that I should wait for the "traffic cops"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If that happens, which it wont, I hope there will be here having her strapped in her "piece of **** government money stolen ford" and carried around town with about 50 broken eggs all over her, and a bad knee.

Off to the LBS I go now, to check the bike...
Damn! I hope your knee heals quickly. It doesn't look bad, but injuries can be deceptive.
Hurts a bit but if something was broken I would'nt be able to walk I think...

Just came back from the LBS, the bike is fine!
Quote: Originally Posted by An old Guy .
When you have an accident, ask for an ambulance.

Hi... Thanks for the reply. You are right. I should ask for an ambulance. Thats what I did when I crashed once on a lunchtime ride in Austria. But I am not in Austria anymore, so basically what would happen if I asked for one would be the following.:

1. I would need to call the police for about 20 times before they actually showed up. Then I would be opted to "sue" or not. If I said that I want to sue, the ho would also sue me for a ******** reason (like being rude or something) and we would both end up in a jail cell until the court house opens for an initial hearing of the case. Which could be for a week maybe if there was a strike or something at the time. So I would get to spend one week in a filthy drunk booth, with the ho that I crashed with, with some junkies, prostitutes and if not some more "stabby" guys also, waiting for the court house to open again.

2. If I opted for an ambulance, I would have my bike (at best) thrown in the back of a pick up truck and tossed on a pile of bikes outside of a police station completely damaging it and ofcourse without getting a refund for anything. In the hospital, in which I would have to wait for about an hour at best, unless I was in really bad shape, they would just x-ray me and do a basic physical. I dont like x-rays due to radiation and bone x-rays have lots of radiation. I dont think that they would give me an MRI if I asked for one.

3. There would be a court case filled, which would run for about a year, for which I would have to spend about 600euros on lawyers and administrative costs, after which they would probably be eventually paid by the ho that crashed me and I would have spend some quality riding time to chat with judges, lawyers and I would have to go to court.

So basically I did ask for the police just to be on the safe side. The police did not show up. I felt ok and I left. If I was feeling bad I would call for an ambulance without involving the car accident at all. Its not the right thing to do, but its the sensible thing to do.

When I was in Austria and crashed. The police came over in a traffic accident dedicated van. Had an breath - test. Then a coworker drove me to the hospital. Was immidiately administered. Had some x-rays a, day off work, two six packs of beer at home and a letter later to visit the police station. I had a small interview and a month later I had a letter that I was not responsible for the accident. No drunk booth, no waiting for courts and ******** law-suits waiting in holding cells...

Anyway I feel fine now so...