Originally Posted by jerzyrider .
When wheels go is it usually a spoke or 2 at a time or would it just be some catastrophic event?
The former. Sure if you hit a really bad pothole at speed or tangle with the curb at high speeds you could fold a rim but even when rider weight is high for a wheelset's ratings the issues are usually individual broken spokes or just wheels that don't want to stay true. Catastrophic wheel failures are rare.
I second getting a good set of custom wheels built, ideally by a local builder you can talk to. It's not nearly as expensive as many folks think and you end up with wheels designed for your needs and your riding style. I'd suggest something built up on some HED Belgium rims or some Kinlin XC-279 rims or perhaps some Velocity A23 rims. All are a bit wider than traditional clincher rims and when paired up with a good set of 25c clinchers you'd have a really nice wheelset for your size and a very comfortable ride with great cornering qualities if you run them at reasonable pressures like 100 psi or even less for a 25c tire on wide clincher rims.
If you want to go the boutique wheel route then look at HED Ardennes in their stallion build or something similar.
BTW in the meantime before you get around to replacing your wheels it would be smart to run relatively large clinchers like 25 tires on your current rims to buy some shock absorber qualities on your current rims as that's one of the best things heavier riders can do to improve ride quality and extend wheel life.
-Dave