How to Ruin A Roadie (in about an hour)



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Seth Jayson

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I finally ruined a perfectly good roadie this weekend.

After riding with Ed Gin & co. in Barrington a week or so ago, the wife, Jen, was interested in
looking at 'bents. So we took a little overnight trip up to see Rolf & Co at the Hostel Shoppe, up
in Pointy Steve, Wis.

After working through a few bikes, we took a spin on Rolf's two Volae Team prototypes. After about
an hour, Jen couldn't believe she'd been riding comfortably at 26 mph into a headwind.

Rolf invited us to join the local bike club for a ride the next morning. He even fixed up the second
prototype so she could use it on the ride. Well, to make the story short, she went out with the
hammerhead group, worked by herself the whole time (since she didn't want to be in the pace group
with only a couple hours of 'bent steering.) When she dropped the group around mile 22, they
responded first by chasing her, then by not informing her of an upcoming turn until she had gone
past. (They were kind enough to yell after they had made the turn and put the hammer down.)

Unfortunately, I missed seeing all this, as I was recovering from food poisoning, pedaling along at
a pokier pace on my pudgy little Rocket.

She finished up 55 miles with an average speed of more than 2mph faster than her (shorter) long ride
on the upright last weekend, and, of course, without the butt pain. She came back and said, "Why
would I ever ride the Klein again?" (BTW, she LOVES the Klein. She has just figured out that it
doesn't measure up to a good, fast 'bent...)

Rolf was so tickled by watching his clubmates struggle to keep up with this unknown woman that he
sent the prototype home with Jen. So if anyone wants to take a peek at the Team, just look for the
fast woman on the gold Volae at TOMRV this weekend, and ask for Jen. She's a convert now, and she'll
be happy to preach to the choir as well as the unwashed heathens.

Seth (who wishes the prototype fit HIM) Jayson

PS, we have a good price on a really nice Klein Quantum.
 
"Seth Jayson" <[email protected]> wrote in message

> PS, we have a good price on a really nice Klein Quantum.

Don't be too hasty selling the bike, once Jen finds out just what elite level roadies like me really
think of benters she won't be taking the contraption out on the road.
 
Now now Flabio, be nice and I won't have to come out to the valley and have a chat with you.
 
SURE would be interesting to see how this SO-CALLED (Self Proclaimed?) elite... roadie matched up
with Ed Gin & Co. or Rich Pinto and John Schlitter with some nice Killer B Aero's afoot. Interesting
as well as to why an alleged staunch elite upwrong cyclist is even trolling around a bent
newsgroup...

Besides the FRIENDLY Smack towards Fabo or FUBU above, CONGRATS on the GREAT ride Seth, that your
wife did! Quite an accomplishment, considering she doesn't even have any bent leg conditioning yet.
(Not easy to switch from an Upwrong to a bent and still go a decent pace, for any length of time!)
EZ Biker :) Pompano Beach, Fl. GRR Ti and Future Aero Ti Pilot)

"Fabrizio Mazzoleni" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Seth Jayson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> > PS, we have a good price on a really nice Klein Quantum.
>
> Don't be too hasty selling the bike, once Jen finds out just what elite level roadies like me
> really think of benters she won't be taking the contraption out on the road.
 
"EZ Biker :)" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> SURE would be interesting to see how this SO-CALLED (Self Proclaimed?) elite... roadie matched up
> with Ed Gin & Co. or Rich Pinto and John Schlitter with some nice Killer B Aero's afoot.
> Interesting as well as to why an alleged staunch elite upwrong cyclist is even trolling around a
bent
> newsgroup...
>
> Besides the FRIENDLY Smack towards Fabo or FUBU above, CONGRATS on the
GREAT
> ride Seth, that your wife did! Quite an accomplishment, considering she doesn't even have any bent
> leg conditioning yet. (Not easy to switch from
an
> Upwrong to a bent and still go a decent pace, for any length of time!) EZ Biker :) Pompano Beach,
> Fl. GRR Ti and Future Aero Ti Pilot)
>
>
> "Fabrizio Mazzoleni" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
> >
> > "Seth Jayson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> >
> > > PS, we have a good price on a really nice Klein Quantum.
> >
> > Don't be too hasty selling the bike, once Jen finds out just what elite level roadies like me
> > really think of benters she won't be taking the contraption out on the road.

LOL! Whatsamatter Fabi? Did everybody killfile you on the other newsgroups? I guess they just don't
dig your elite vibe, huh?

I think Fabi got dropped by a 'bent, and it smarted something awful. There there...Mommy's here now.
You just cry your eyes out.

B
 
Actually Fabbo, most of us think you are a kid at the keyboard who still has training wheels on your
huffy, and we really don't give a **** what you think. "Fabrizio Mazzoleni" <[email protected]>
wrote in message news:[email protected]...
>
> "Seth Jayson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> > PS, we have a good price on a really nice Klein Quantum.
>
> Don't be too hasty selling the bike, once Jen finds out just what elite level roadies like me
> really think of benters she won't be taking the contraption out on the road.
 
"Mo" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:p[email protected]...
> Now now Flabio, be nice and I won't have to come out to the valley and have a chat with you.
>
>
If you do meet us for the post ride coffee could you please park the bent around the cornor and out
of sight, us roadies have a obligation to uphold the fine image of euro type cycling.

Not that I dislike you, it's just we take the outside table near the door and you can't imagine just
how many women we get looking us over.

That's something a recreational type can ruin just by hanging around us. What you can do is take
another table and I will give you my cell number and you can phone me.
 
"Fabrizio Mazzoleni" <[email protected]> wrote in message news

> Don't be too hasty selling the bike, once Jen finds out just what elite level roadies like me
> really think of benters she won't be taking the contraption out on the road.

Dang Fabrizio, haven't seen you trolling this board in a week or so. What's the matter, finding it
difficult to come up with witty remarks? Getting a little tired perhaps?

I have to admit you're one funny guy. I bet you're an "elite" level comedian. Second-City educated,
right? I knew it. You probably have a whole stand-up act based on your "online" personna right?
What's the name of the act, Numb-Nutts? Hehehe, I'd pay good money to see a comic spoof of an
"elite" level roadie. I bet you floor everyone when you walk out on stage with a Bianchi shoved
halfway up your ****-chute.

All fun and games aside. Don't quit your day job as a comedian. God knows you'd suck at being even a
CAT 4 cyclist, to say nothing for getting paid to be a Pro-level cyclist. But I'm a friendly guy! No
hard feelings my man! any time you'd like to cause yourself a stroke, come out to Chicago. I'd love
to give you a "socially-paced" tour of our scenic training grounds. Any time you have the gonads to
race, just name the place (in America). Preferably the Midwest; I don't like to subject my exquisite
Baron to the perils of Air Travel. I also think it's a bit unfair to race a guy that tells jokes for
a living. But just this once, I'll stoop to your level.

-Windy City Keith
 
> Don't be too hasty selling the bike, once Jen finds out just what elite level roadies like me
> really think of benters she won't be taking the contraption out on the road.

<feeding troll> She already knows what _stronzi_ like you think of 'bents. She doesn't care,
ragazzo. Think it all you want while you watch her back wheel get smaller.

Perche non scrivi in Italiano, se voi fare il grande piloto Italiano? Perche fai sempre il cattivo?
E perche stai cosi emmozionante sopre i 'bent? C'e l'hai qualcosa giu che non basta? Sicuramente, tu
sai che guidare un 'bent puo farlo meglio subito. </feeding troll>

Sj
 
On Tue, 03 Jun 2003 17:35:03 GMT, "Fabrizio Mazzoleni" <[email protected]> wrote:

>you can't imagine just how many women we get looking us over.

Hmmm, somehow that's entirely believable on several levels.

Fab's probably too young to remember Beanie and Cecil,-- not exactly sock puppets, but close.
Perhaps there's a family resemblance, though.

One fine example has gone from Internet Pet Store Icon to Insurance Spokes Puppet. So, Fab, hang in
there, but watch out for the bossa nova.

The girl from Ipanema says "Fabrizio Mazzoleni" is actually "A Rio Fizzle Zamboni".

A beleza que nao e so minha Que tambem passa sozinha

Jon
 
Now now everyone, let's not get on Fabrizione's back. It was obviously I who was trolling, not Fabbo
Fabbo. Just look back at the subject heading. He was only defending his honor.

I just wish he had a few more jokes up his sleeve. Maybe some authentic Italian cursing.

"Ti do un pugno nella pancia per fare una nicchia per la Madonnina!" or something like that. Of
course, I'm not sure Fabb's really Italian. He might just have adopted a pseudonym to sound exotic.

And let's be sure not to judge all Italian's by Fabrizino's example. Last year on RAGBRAI, I rode
with some of the Team Veneto. Nice folks, people who put on 10000K a year, and who, interestingly
enough, could not wait to try my 'bent. One of them did shove a frame pump into my spokes, but he
was just kickin' it old school.
 
Fabrizio Mazzoleni wrote:

> Not that I dislike you, it's just we take the outside table near the door and you can't imagine
> just how many women we get looking us over.

They are probably just laughing at your funny padded pants.
 
Fabrizio Mazzoleni wrote:

> us roadies have a obligation to uphold the fine image of euro type cycling.

I have news, Fabrizio. "Euro-type cycling" is riding a two-tone black and rust black sit-up-and-beg
with optional three-speed gears and tri-bars (quite common in Denmark, even for little old ladies).
The lycra-clad Miserable Roadie (tm) is a tiny minority.

Dave Larrington European
 
In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] says...
> Fabrizio Mazzoleni wrote:
>
> > us roadies have a obligation to uphold the fine image of euro type cycling.
>
> I have news, Fabrizio. "Euro-type cycling" is riding a two-tone black and rust black
> sit-up-and-beg with optional three-speed gears and tri-bars (quite common in Denmark, even for
> little old ladies). The lycra-clad Miserable Roadie (tm) is a tiny minority.
>
> Dave Larrington European

This is how they roll them in Vienna: http://www.clee.org/images/Vienna_Serious_Cyclist.jpg
--

Cletus D. Lee Bacchetta Giro Lightning Voyager http://www.clee.org
- Bellaire, TX USA -
 
I thought that a roadie is the guy who schleps stuff from trucks onto the stage of a rock show,
tears down the stage and schleps stuff back to the trucks. The subject of a song by Jackson Brown.
We should come up with a better name for lycra clad pretenders on bikes way too expensive for the
wimpy quads that propel them down the asphalt with their poseur attitudes so they aren't confused
with guys (and female 'guys') who bust a nut to make all too few bucks for their herculean efforts.
And a way to differentiate them from the real licensed cat bike racers who train hard for
competition with their peers.Some kind of a compilation of racer wannabe and it ain't gonna be's...
Something like ASSFAULTERS as opposed to ASSHAULERS. Maybe we should just refer to them as FABIOS.
"Seth Jayson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> I finally ruined a perfectly good roadie this weekend.
>
> After riding with Ed Gin & co. in Barrington a week or so ago, the wife, Jen, was interested in
> looking at 'bents. So we took a little overnight trip up to see Rolf & Co at the Hostel Shoppe, up
> in Pointy Steve, Wis.
>
> After working through a few bikes, we took a spin on Rolf's two Volae Team prototypes. After about
> an hour, Jen couldn't believe she'd been riding comfortably at 26 mph into a headwind.
>
> Rolf invited us to join the local bike club for a ride the next morning. He even fixed up the
> second prototype so she could use it on the ride. Well, to make the story short, she went out with
> the hammerhead group, worked by herself the whole time (since she didn't want to be in the pace
> group with only a couple hours of 'bent steering.) When she dropped the group around mile 22, they
> responded first by chasing her, then by not informing her of an upcoming turn until she had gone
> past. (They were kind enough to yell after they had made the turn and put the hammer down.)
>
> Unfortunately, I missed seeing all this, as I was recovering from food poisoning, pedaling along
> at a pokier pace on my pudgy little Rocket.
>
>
> She finished up 55 miles with an average speed of more than 2mph faster than her (shorter) long
> ride on the upright last weekend, and, of course, without the butt pain. She came back and said,
> "Why would I ever ride the Klein again?" (BTW, she LOVES the Klein. She has just figured out that
> it doesn't measure up to a good, fast 'bent...)
>
>
> Rolf was so tickled by watching his clubmates struggle to keep up with this unknown woman that he
> sent the prototype home with Jen. So if anyone wants to take a peek at the Team, just look for the
> fast woman on the gold Volae at TOMRV this weekend, and ask for Jen. She's a convert now, and
> she'll be happy to preach to the choir as well as the unwashed heathens.
>
> Seth (who wishes the prototype fit HIM) Jayson
>
> PS, we have a good price on a really nice Klein Quantum.
 
"Dave Larrington" <[email protected]> wrote in message .de...
> >
> I have news, Fabrizio. "Euro-type cycling" is riding a two-tone black and rust black
> sit-up-and-beg with optional three-speed gears and tri-bars (quite common in Denmark, even for
> little old ladies).

That's why guys like Hincapie, Antony Cruz, Rodriquez, Tyler Hamilton, and Me use Girona in the
Catalonia region as our base when over there.

I don't think you'll be seeing any guys on bents out in Museew's stomping grounds around Gistel in
the Ostend region.
 
"EZ Biker :-\)" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:<[email protected]>...
> SURE would be interesting to see how this SO-CALLED (Self Proclaimed?) elite... roadie matched up
> with Ed Gin & Co. or Rich Pinto and John Schlitter with some nice Killer B Aero's afoot.
> Interesting as well as to why an alleged staunch elite upwrong cyclist is even trolling around a
> bent newsgroup...
>
As we know, Fab is a troll, but at least he's a funny one. His personna sure talks the talk, even on
the other newsgroup. Makes me wonder how much time he spends coming up with all these names to drop.

Maybe we should take up a collection to send him to MRR. He could be the designated 'target' for a
flyby workshop. It'd give some of the new recumbenteers a chance to work on technique. :lol
 
Yea John, I guess TROLLS need LOVE too.... <Grin> I could have sworn I saw that guy on A1A today.
This real SLICK MACHO Italian guy on a $9000.00 upwrong. (One of those Colonago (Sp?) Bikes) EZ
Biker :) Pompano Beach, Fl. (GRR Ti and SOON, Bacchetta Aero Pilot)

"John Foltz" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> "EZ Biker :-\)" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:<[email protected]>...
> As we know, Fab is a troll, but at least he's a funny one.
 
Fabrizio Mazzoleni wrote:

> I don't think you'll be seeing any guys on bents out in Museew's stomping grounds around Gistel in
> the Ostend region.

Found several between Ostend and Ghent while riding to the 2000 HPV World Championships...

Dave Larrington - http://www.legslarry.beerdrinkers.co.uk/
===========================================================
Editor - British Human Power Club Newsletter
http://www.bhpc.org.uk/
===========================================================
 
"Dave Larrington" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:bc1mv4$ej2km$1@ID-

> Found several between Ostend and Ghent while riding to the 2000 HPV World Championships...
>
OK, I'll take your word for it, but I just can't bear to think guys are riding those things on the
sacred roads we race on in April at events like Liege- Bastogne-Liege, Ghent-Wevelgem, and the
Fleche Wallonne.

Just keep those damn things off the monuments of cycling such as the Mur de Grammont, the Kwaremont,
and the Koppenberg.

If guys like Godefroot, de Mol, de Vlaeminck, and Daems knew what you were up to they would be sick
just like I was when I read your post this morning.
 
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