Me too
There is a middle ground. Maybe you should pick one or two target events per year, something that will test your fitness. In my case, I would pick a long hillclimb TT or RR (e.g., 2hrs or so). A TT or hillclimb isn't dependent on drafting, so it's more about your own power and power/weight ratio. A target event (even if it is just once a year) provides a motivation for training and fitness. In my part of the world, if it weren't so hard to get into the event I would choose the Death Ride.
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RDO suggestion is a good one and Felt you do nail it down with this sentence but honestly it really comes down to commitment vs. reward. For me, the 3 days a week, 2 hours a day and than weekends with even longer hours to prepare for one event, fitness is a fairly large commitment for what seems like a small reward compared to where I could use those 10 hours.. It is especially tough as I really need to get it done before 9am, feel tired as heck afterwards and a side note of have to make sure the back does not act up. If I was on a team or doing racing regularly than I understand it. I do not need to be at the bg level either but to just train to train is just not working for me. I need a bit more and give you Felt a big hand for your training schedule.
I find this quite interesting - the reward for me is the riding, what most people call training I guess. I don't do events - Other than occasionally doing ones I feel obligated to do like club events, or occasionally because I'm told it's silly to be fit but to not use it etc. However I don't take them particularly seriously as I don't get the pleasure out of doing that. Entering events is a chore for me, and I can get quite annoyed by the hassling to compete - not that I'm not competitive.
There are so many ways to pursue cycling and I think for most it is the journey they took that leads them to their choice of cycling goals. For me as a young lad I was a messenger and I still say to this day it was the best job I ever had but never thought about racing cause honestly cycling was really not that big in the streets of Brooklyn. Turn ahead about 30 years after I gained lots of weight for working too much and too many hostess cakes, one day my wife and friend walks in and they look at me and say boy you have gained weight. I say, huh? They giggle. I still have that moment burned in my mind. Went to the gym and got into weights and decided to go back to my love with commuting. Spin ahead again as I make the goal of riding my bike from NYC to Boston by myself and did it. Than I go NYC to Baltimore, did it. Had tons of fun...
There is actually some empirical evidence for this difference. The Gallup Organization has done some very interesting work on defining a set of 34 "talents" that define us. Two talents relate to motivation: competition and achiever. Competition is defined as a need to gauge your success comparatively. Achiever is defined as a drive that is internal, constant, and self-imposed. I have done competitive sports my entire life, and many assume that I have the competition talent. Actually, I have the achiever talent. I actually don't care much about winning. I care about getting the most out of my own unique talents. If I were to win a hill climb with a time 5 minutes slower than my personal best, I would feel disappointment. If I were to come in 10th in the same race with a personal best time, I would be thrilled.
You are not crazy, just motivated like heck.
Without analyzing your ride file, I can't be definitive, but I will posit a possible explanation for your performance. Long races with lots of anaerobic efforts deplete the part of AWC that has a long recovery half-life. Think of your AWC as two separate batteries. One battery (the larger one) recharges itself quickly with a recharge half-life of 30secs. So, even if you fully deplete your AWC with an anaerobic effort (e.g., 5mins at 120%FTP), it will be almost fully recharged in 3-5mins. But, the other battery (the smaller one) has a much longer half-life (e.g., several hours) and won't be fully recharged until the next day. So, you have to analyze the cumulative anaerobic efforts to see what's going on. Let's say you get dropped in an anaerobic effort after 3hrs of racing. When you look at your ride file and you look at your NP after 3hrs, it may be well within your limits. And, when you look at the specific anaerobic effort in which you were dropped, that too may be well within your limits. But, when you look at your cumulative anaerobic efforts during the first 3hrs, you might find the answer to why you were dropped. Again, I'm not saying this is what is going on. I'm saying it is often an explanation to struggles with anaerobic efforts late in a race.
I think RDO's post a few ago about competitors and achievers is a good insight. Both are good and it is nice to know which category each of us leans toward. I suppose we can have a ratio between the two as well. I lean heavily as an achiever and I am very self-motivated, but I did have a little bit of a competitor in me as well.
Well ****....I am a liar. I did not make 80 as I so excitingly claimed and I hate getting older because I need reading glasses now to see things up close.
