Light bulb jokes

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Guest, Jun 3, 2002.

  1. Guest

    Guest Guest

    Here are a couple of lightbulb jokes:

    How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    That's not funny!

    How many country singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
    ten. One to actually change it and nine to write songs about the old one!

    How many zen-masters does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A tree in a golden forest.

    How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?
    three. One to change it, another to witness it, and a third to shoot the witness.

    How many punks does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Two. One to change it and the other to kick the chair out from under the first.

    Alright, let's hear some more!!!
     
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  2. Guest

    Guest Guest

    How many sorority girls does it take to change a lightbulb?
    5...One to chair the committee to change the lightbulb, one to coordinate the location, one to get a fraternity to come help, one to make the t-shirt, and one to sleep with the fraternity boy who changed it.

    How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
    One...he holds the bulb still and lets the world revolve around him.

    How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?
    Roughly 600, the projected completion date is Oct 2025.
     
  3. Guest

    Guest Guest

    Q: How many Help Desk workers does it take to change a light bulb?

    A: PC Repair has received your mail concerning your hardware problem and has assigned your request Service Order Number 39712. Please use this number for any future reference to this case of trouble. As soon as a technician becomes available, you will be contacted.

    ***

    Q: How many actors does it take to change a lightbulb?

    A: Four...One to change the lightbulb while the other three stand around complaining how "It could have been me up there!"
     
  4. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

    How many can you afford?
     
  5. LottomagicZ4941

    LottomagicZ4941 New Member

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    LOL Especally on the lawyer one!!!

    How many network marketers does it take to change a light bulb?

    No one really knows but they keep on recruiting until they find one that will do it.
     
  6. scoty

    scoty New Member

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    How many phychiatrists does it take to chang a light bulb?

    One, but the light bulb has to want to change!
     
  7. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    Five. One to screw the bulb in, two to discuss the violation of the socket, and two to secretly wish they were the socket.
     
  8. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    Californians screw in hot tubs, not in light bulbs.
     
  9. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

    None - that's a hardware problem.
     
  10. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    I already posted this and others in the ADD thread - I would put them here but this site has a rule against cross-posting....
     
  11. giantnrsfsrider

    giantnrsfsrider New Member

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    How many iranians does it take?
    105 one to hold the bulb, four to turn the chair, and 100 to turn the house.
     
  12. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many police officers does it take to change a light bulb?

    Five. One to change the bulb and four to go out for donuts.
     
  13. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many new mothers does it take to change a light bulb?

    None - they don't make pampers that small.
     
  14. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

    Two. One to change the bulb and the other to kick the chair out from under him.
     
  15. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many terrorists does it take to change a light bulb?

    100. One to change the bulb and 99 to hold the house hostage.
     
  16. LottomagicZ4941

    LottomagicZ4941 New Member

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    Did you hear about the light bulb that wone the lotto?

    He bought himself a new socket.

    Alternate ending

    Of course not light bulbs don't play the lotto.
     
  17. LottomagicZ4941

    LottomagicZ4941 New Member

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    LOL just found another funny light bulb one. Kicking myself that I didn't think of it myself!!!!

    posted by michael_legna vbmenu_register("postmenu_27005", true);

    "How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to change a lightbulb ?

    I Don't know - I didn't let them in to find out. "

    found on
    http://www.christiansonline.cc/forum/showthread.php?p=27637#post27637

    also on the same thread

    Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it. by Darth_Bill
    Latter Day Saints
     
  18. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    Now THAT'S FUNNY!!
    :D
     
  19. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    Two, but how they got in it remains a mystery.
     
  20. oakdog8

    oakdog8 New Member

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    What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?

    You can unscrew a lightbulb.
     
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