(Friends, PLEASE read this!--Waldo)
Dr. Laura does not understand the Scriptures. She should learn what
Proverbs means when it says, "Better to live in the corner of an attic
than with a shrewish woman."
Why Can't I Own a Canadian?
Dr. Laura Schlesinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to
people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an
observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to
Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.
The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by an East Coast
resident, which was posted on the Internet. It is funny, as well as
informative.
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God s Law. I
have
learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge
with
as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him or her that Leviticus
18:22
clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some
advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws
and
how to follow them.
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors.
They
claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus
21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is how
do
I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
female,
provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine
claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
clarify?
Why can't I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2
clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to
kill
him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than
homosexuality.
I do not agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does
my
vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
around
their temples, even though Lev. 19:27 expressly forbids this. How
should
they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different
crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of
two
different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to
curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it necessary that we go to all the
trouble
of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16.
Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like
the
one we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident
you
can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God s word is eternal
and
unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Moshe