OT - I think this has gotta be one of the funniest.......

....songs I ever heard an Irishman sing ',;~}

Sick Note, The

(Pat Cooksey)

Dear Sir, I write this note to you to tell you of me plight And at the time of writing I am not a
pretty sight Me body is all black and blue, me face a deathly gray And I write this note to say why
Paddy's not at work today

While working on the fourteenth floor some bricks I had to clear Now to throw them down from such a
height it was not a good idea The foreman wasn't very pleased, he bein' an awkward sod He said I'd
have to cart them down the ladders in me hod

Now clearing all these bricks by hand it was so very slow So I hoisted up a barrel and secured the
rope below But in me haste to do the job I was too blind to see That a barrel full of building
bricks was heavier than me

So when I untied the rope the barrel fell like lead And clinging tightly to the rope I started up
instead Well, I shot up like a rocket 'til to my dismay I found That halfway up I met the bloody
barrel coming down

Well, the barrel broke me shoulder as to the ground it sped And when I reached the top I banged the
pulley with me head While I clung on tight all numb with shock from this almighty blow And the
barrel spilled out half the bricks fourteen floors below

Now, when these bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor I then outweighed the barrel and so
started down once more Still clinging tightly to the rope I sped towards the ground And I landed on
the broken bricks that were all scattered round

Well, I laid there groaning on the ground I thought I'd passed the worst When the barrel hit the
pulley wheel and then the bottom burst Well, a shower of bricks rained down on me, I hadn't got a
hope As I lay there moaning on the ground, I let go the bloody rope

The barrel then being heavier it started down once more And landed right across me as I lay upon the
floor Well it broke three ribs and my left arm and I can only say That I hope you'll understand why
Paddy's not at work today

 

"Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> ....songs I ever heard an Irishman sing ',;~}

You left out half of it. The missing part has been filled in. (I resisted the temptation to
go through and correct the other errors) As I have this song on CD (and mp3) so I know the
song by heart.

> Sick Note, The
>
> (Pat Cooksey)
>
> Dear Sir, I write this note to you to tell you of me plight And at the time of writing I am not a
> pretty sight Me body is all black and blue, me face a deathly gray And I write this note to say
> why Paddy's not at work today
>
> While working on the fourteenth floor some bricks I had to clear Now to throw them down from such
> a height it was not a good idea The foreman wasn't very pleased, he bein' an awkward sod He said
> I'd have to cart them down the ladders in me hod
>
> Now clearing all these bricks by hand it was so very slow So I hoisted up a barrel and secured the
> rope below But in me haste to do the job I was too blind to see That a barrel full of building
> bricks was heavier than me
>
> So when I untied the rope the barrel fell like lead And clinging tightly to the rope I started up
> instead Well, I shot up like a rocket 'til to my dismay I found That halfway up I met the bloody
> barrel coming down
>
> Well, the barrel broke me shoulder as to the ground it sped And when I reached the top I banged
> the pulley with me head While I clung on tight all numb with shock from this almighty blow And the
> barrel spilled out half the bricks fourteen floors below
>
> Now, when these bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor I then outweighed the barrel and so
> started down once more

I clung on tightly to the rope, me body wracked with pain. And half way down I met the bloody barrel
once again.

The force of this collision half way down the office block, caused multiple abrasions and a nasty
state of shock.

> I clung on tightly to the rope as I fell towards the ground And I landed on the broken bricks the
> barrel had scattered round
>
> Well, I laid there groaning on the ground I thought I'd passed the worst When the barrel hit the
> pulley wheel and then the bottom burst Well, a shower of bricks rained down on me, I hadn't got a
> hope As I lay there moaning on the ground, I let go the bloody rope
>
> The barrel then being heavier it started down once more And landed right across me as I lay upon
> the floor Well it broke three ribs and my left arm and I can only say That I hope you'll
> understand why Paddy's not at work today