OT - Obnoxious customers & limits



"jacqui{JB}" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...

[following up on my own post, regardless of it being bad form :)]

> Good luck. :)


One more thing. I suggest reading Gavin DeBecker's book, _The Gift of
Fear_. It will help you better learn to trust your danger radar and
determine who coming into your shop may be a real threat and who is just an
obnoxious asshole.

-j
 
Nancy Young wrote:
> "Julia Altshuler" <[email protected]> wrote
>
>> wanted. Somewhere in there, and it's hard to remember where, the
>> customer interupted me at which point I knew immediately to shut up
>> and let him finish. I smiled at him while he went into this long
>> tirade, the upshot of which was that the boss KNOWS he wants the
>> wine since he orders a case every month, KNOWS his name and that he
>> doesn't have to put up with this, if he has to he'll order somewhere
>> else. I'm making it sound more polite than it was. The man was a
>> jerk. I just stood there and smiled while he bawled me out. When
>> he asked me something that amounted to "can you do that?" I nodded
>> once, and he left.

>
> Heh, what a jerk, and he also likes to think he's the king of you.
> If you really were smiling, you might have been infuriating him more
> that way, I've seen that, too.
>

I was taught years ago (but of course this was telephone customer
service)... if someone gets rude, as in to the point of cussing, ask him to
spell it. "I'm sorry, how do you spell that, sir?" They usually sputter
and run off like the simple minded pricks they are. But I have never run
into this in a face to face situation.

Sounds to me like your boss is protecting his business. He didn't defend
you but he denied this guy was a regular customer. Hmmm. I'd be concerned
about that. I know you like this job but I'd expect my boss to stand up for
me. As for the chickie getting hit on, she's not dealing with it right,
either. She needs to tell the boss she won't take it. But then again, at
her age she might just be flattered by it and telling you she wants to
"hide" when what she really wants is for this guy to seek her out. I sure
hope he's not a serial killer.

IMO, avoid him and if your boss won't stand up and defend you for doing
nothing more than asking for info for a special order, at least make note of
this guys comings and goings into the shop. And happy holidays, Lia!

Jill
 
Damsel in dis Dress wrote:
> On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 05:43:43 GMT, RoR <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>
>>I see absolutely no leeway for "friendly touching" among strangers, customers, employees,
>>or co-workers. There is no such thing, and the line gets too blurred if any touching is
>>allowed.

>
>
> To throw this even further off-topic ... why is it that complete
> strangers feel free to touch the bellies of pregnant women? I hated
> that!


aaargh! I didn't mind it so much when it was close friends and family,
but yeah, it sucked when people I barely knew did that.

--

saerah

"Peace is not an absence of war, it is a virtue, a state of mind, a
disposition for benevolence, confidence, justice."
-Baruch Spinoza

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"RoR" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> They should have defended you. They have a responsibility to treat you
> with dignity and
> respect and to defend you, especially since you informed them about
> the situation. It's
> not like they were blind-sided with the call.


Rick, please will you explain 'blind-sided?
 
"Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote

> "RoR" <[email protected]> wrote


>> They should have defended you. They have a responsibility to treat you
>> with dignity and
>> respect and to defend you, especially since you informed them about the
>> situation. It's
>> not like they were blind-sided with the call.

>
> Rick, please will you explain 'blind-sided?


That's when you don't see something coming, it comes right
outta the blue (you have that expression?) ... if she hadn't
mentioned it and they had no clue what the customer was talking
about when he called, that's blind sided, to them it came out of
nowhere. Well, she did, and it didn't, they were aware why he
was calling.

Clear as mud? (smile)

nancy.
 
"Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote
>
>> "RoR" <[email protected]> wrote

>
>>> They should have defended you. They have a responsibility to treat
>>> you with dignity and
>>> respect and to defend you, especially since you informed them about
>>> the situation. It's
>>> not like they were blind-sided with the call.

>>
>> Rick, please will you explain 'blind-sided?

>
> That's when you don't see something coming, it comes right
> outta the blue (you have that expression?) ...


Yes! Thank you:))

if she hadn't
> mentioned it and they had no clue what the customer was talking
> about when he called, that's blind sided, to them it came out of
> nowhere. Well, she did, and it didn't, they were aware why he
> was calling.
>
> Clear as mud? (smile)


LOL thanks nancy

Perhaps you can clear up another mystery while you are at it?

Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it
goes something like 'I Jonesed it' ???
 
Edwin Pawlowski wrote:

> Customers can be rude and obnixious, but there has to be a limit. As some
> point you step up and take action.


I am sure there is a limit. I just feel sorry for the poor salesclerk who
underestimates that limit and ends up getting fired.

> If i was being berated by a customer and
> you allowed it to happen, you can be sure it was my last day on the job
> becuase you are putting the sale ahead of my treatment. NO ONE should put
> up with abuse as it just causes more of it to happen if enabled.


Are we talking single incidents of abuse or the cumulative effects of being
constantly berated? The problem is that some people have a dim view of people
in some positions and consider them fair game for abuse. Coincidentally, the
employers of those same people also consider them in the same light. A lot of
retail owners fit that bill.

> Why is it you can stand there with ticket book in hand and get justice, but
> you don't think the retail clerks should be able to take control over a
> situation?


It is because I was an officer appointed to enforce the law and had a badge that
gave me the authority. Don't take that as a smug answer. It was not as there
was no accountability, because abuse of that authority could get me in trouble.
The point is that that authority is what is missing with a clerk.
 
"Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it goes
> something like 'I Jonesed it' ???


It's a craving. I have no idea where the term comes from.
 
"Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote

> Perhaps you can clear up another mystery while you are at it?
>
> Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it goes
> something like 'I Jonesed it' ???


I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.

I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict who
needs a fix.

nancy
 
"Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote
>
>> Perhaps you can clear up another mystery while you are at it?
>>
>> Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it
>> goes something like 'I Jonesed it' ???

>
> I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.
>
> I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict who
> needs a fix.


Oh blimey!!!! But why Jones???
 
"Edwin Pawlowski" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:eek:[email protected]...
>
> "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>> Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it
>> goes something like 'I Jonesed it' ???

>
> It's a craving. I have no idea where the term comes from.


Thanks Edwin:) I don't know about US but Jones is a common name in
UK:))
 
"Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote

> "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote


>> I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.
>>
>> I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict who
>> needs a fix.

>
> Oh blimey!!!! But why Jones???


Lost in the mists of time, most likely. And now I have that
song stuck in my head, was it from that Bill Cosby cartoon,
Fat Albert? Basketball jooooones, I got a basketball joooones.

nancy
 
"Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote
>
>> "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote

>
>>> I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.
>>>
>>> I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict
>>> who
>>> needs a fix.

>>
>> Oh blimey!!!! But why Jones???

>
> Lost in the mists of time, most likely. And now I have that
> song stuck in my head, was it from that Bill Cosby cartoon,
> Fat Albert? Basketball jooooones, I got a basketball joooones.


LOL, new one on me:))
 
In article <[email protected]>,
Dave Smith <[email protected]> wrote:

> It is because I was an officer appointed to enforce the law and had a badge
> that
> gave me the authority. Don't take that as a smug answer. It was not as
> there
> was no accountability, because abuse of that authority could get me in
> trouble.
> The point is that that authority is what is missing with a clerk.



But it should not be... :-(

At least where I work, I have the option of calling for Security (the
dudes with the badges) if I feel I'm being abused.

Plus, I have the security of knowing that the entire thing is probably
being videotaped by the security cameras. ;-) That way it's not just my
word against theirs!
--
Om.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-*****." -Jack Nicholson
 
"Dave Smith" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> It is because I was an officer appointed to enforce the law and had a
> badge that
> gave me the authority. Don't take that as a smug answer. It was not as
> there
> was no accountability, because abuse of that authority could get me in
> trouble.
> The point is that that authority is what is missing with a clerk.


The point is, the clerk should be empowered to take care of the really rude
customers. There is no excuse for a person to be degraded by another. The
boss should give some guidelines as there are some tough customers, but foul
language should be a stopper. At the very least, the clerk should just
walk away and get someone else to keep an eye on the customer. Simple
guidelines: what if the clerk was your daughter or wife. How much do you
expect them to endure?

Take away your badge and ticket book, How much would you have put up with
if you had no recourse for revenge?
 
On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 08:51:49 +0100, "jacqui{JB}"
<[email protected]> replied:
>"Damsel in dis Dress" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> > To throw this even further off-topic ... why is it
> > that complete strangers feel free to touch the bellies
> > of pregnant women? I hated that!


When SWMBO was pregnant with Daughter-units Alpha and Beta, she
was pooched straight out like she was a forklift with a couple of
heavy beachballs. Many women would come up to her in the grocery
store, at work, in restaurants, and quickly touch her stomach. It
was shocking to me because I couldn't IMAGINE anyone invading her
personal space without her directly giving them leave... To her,
it was downright terrifying. It took a few time before I learned
to judge who might and who might not be willing to come over and
then I ran interference.

> I cannot imagine what possesses some people. [..]


It's supposed to be a way of transferring the positiveness of a
pregnant woman's being fertile and passing some of that goodness
on to the touchie. Or, in the case of the grandmotherly types,
passing on some of their luck to the expectant mother. <shrug>
Karmic values aside... It never hurt anyone to ask her first. It
did when I was present and they self-invited, though.

The Ranger
 
On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 11:59:58 GMT, "Ophelia" <[email protected]>
replied:
[snip]
>Jones! [..]


To want something in an uncontrollably compulsive way. "I was
Jonesin' for a piece of that Chocolate Decadence Instant Death!"

The Ranger
 
On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 07:49:58 -0500, Dave Smith
<[email protected]> replied:
>Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
> > Customers can be rude and obnixious, but there has to be a limit.
> > As some point you step up and take action.
> >

> I am sure there is a limit. I just feel sorry for the poor salesclerk who
>underestimates that limit and ends up getting fired.


Sales clerks are a dime-a-dozen. Experienced sales clerks,
regardless of the merchandise being hawked, are no higher on the
ladder.

A sale -- regardless of how obnoxious the customer -- brings in
moneys to continue providing the service or items. A back-sassing
sales clerk will chase customers away. And a second-hand account
(like what was provided in the OP) will have only minor support.
Unless the owner _sees_ it firsthand, he can't do anything beyond
what he's already done; listen to the employee and continue the
sale.

The Ranger
 
On Sat, 17 Dec 2005 16:01:48 -0500, Julia Altshuler
<[email protected]> wrote:

<snip>
>
>This is a young lady I really like. She's young (22), quite pretty,
>very nice, the sort of kid who can talk to and make friends with people
>who are older (I'm 47) and be lovely and genuine. She has an infectious
>laugh and bright smile. I could understand that young men might think
>she was flirting, but it's hard to help it when you're that pretty. She
>could model. (She has professional dance and acting experience.) It
>turns out that the customer has been hitting on her. She said it
>started out O.K. with him just talking to her, but most recently he's
>been asking her out and making comments of the "if I were younger"
>variety, not of the kindly old man gently teases with young woman old
>enough to be his granddaughter, but more of the middle aged man makes
>young woman uncomfortable variety. She said that the next time he comes
>in, she's heading for the bathroom and staying there.
>
>This leads me to the question I'm opening for discussion. What are the
>limits? I know what I'd put up with from a boss, but I've never
>wondered before about what I'm expected to put up with from a customer.
> You read all the time about sexual harrassment from a boss, but what
>about from a customer? The boss (a nice guy who can get grouchy but who
>has never been mean or unfair, someone who is actually more likely to
>get himself into trouble for being a pushover) hasn't given us any
>guidelines except the nothing illegal one. Any thoughts?


She'd better learn to handle this type of situation. First of all,
nothing indicates that the guy is sexually harassing her. He's
flirting with her and seeing if she is responsive. Don't blame him;
if you are able to see how the fellow might think that she's
flirtatious, then what is he supposed to think? Maybe he thinks she
IS interested in him and, from his POV, why not?

If she doesn't want that type of reaction, perhaps taking on a more
business-like demeanor with customers might help.

At this point, if she wants to sent a boundary with this guy, all she
has to do is look him in the eye and firmly say "Sorry, I've got a
boyfriend."

I'm not saying the guy isn't a jerk, he sounds like it. But she's a
big girl. Age 22 is old enough to grow up and take responsibility for
setting the tone of the interaction rather than hiding and blaming
customers for harassment.

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!
 
On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 00:01:07 -0600, Damsel in dis Dress
<[email protected]> wrote:

>On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 05:43:43 GMT, RoR <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>> I see absolutely no leeway for "friendly touching" among strangers, customers, employees,
>> or co-workers. There is no such thing, and the line gets too blurred if any touching is
>> allowed.

>
>To throw this even further off-topic ... why is it that complete
>strangers feel free to touch the bellies of pregnant women? I hated
>that!
>

Funny you should say that- I saw a home improvement show Friday where
one of the (female) show workers did that to the homeowner. I was
really surprized but thought that perhaps they cleared it ahead of
time with the mother-to-be.

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!