OT - Obnoxious customers & limits

Discussion in 'Food and nutrition' started by Julia Altshuler, Dec 17, 2005.

  1. jacqui{JB}

    jacqui{JB} Guest

    "jacqui{JB}" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]

    [following up on my own post, regardless of it being bad form :)]

    > Good luck. :)


    One more thing. I suggest reading Gavin DeBecker's book, _The Gift of
    Fear_. It will help you better learn to trust your danger radar and
    determine who coming into your shop may be a real threat and who is just an
    obnoxious asshole.

    -j
     


  2. jmcquown

    jmcquown Guest

    Nancy Young wrote:
    > "Julia Altshuler" <[email protected]> wrote
    >
    >> wanted. Somewhere in there, and it's hard to remember where, the
    >> customer interupted me at which point I knew immediately to shut up
    >> and let him finish. I smiled at him while he went into this long
    >> tirade, the upshot of which was that the boss KNOWS he wants the
    >> wine since he orders a case every month, KNOWS his name and that he
    >> doesn't have to put up with this, if he has to he'll order somewhere
    >> else. I'm making it sound more polite than it was. The man was a
    >> jerk. I just stood there and smiled while he bawled me out. When
    >> he asked me something that amounted to "can you do that?" I nodded
    >> once, and he left.

    >
    > Heh, what a jerk, and he also likes to think he's the king of you.
    > If you really were smiling, you might have been infuriating him more
    > that way, I've seen that, too.
    >

    I was taught years ago (but of course this was telephone customer
    service)... if someone gets rude, as in to the point of cussing, ask him to
    spell it. "I'm sorry, how do you spell that, sir?" They usually sputter
    and run off like the simple minded pricks they are. But I have never run
    into this in a face to face situation.

    Sounds to me like your boss is protecting his business. He didn't defend
    you but he denied this guy was a regular customer. Hmmm. I'd be concerned
    about that. I know you like this job but I'd expect my boss to stand up for
    me. As for the chickie getting hit on, she's not dealing with it right,
    either. She needs to tell the boss she won't take it. But then again, at
    her age she might just be flattered by it and telling you she wants to
    "hide" when what she really wants is for this guy to seek her out. I sure
    hope he's not a serial killer.

    IMO, avoid him and if your boss won't stand up and defend you for doing
    nothing more than asking for info for a special order, at least make note of
    this guys comings and goings into the shop. And happy holidays, Lia!

    Jill
     
  3. Damsel in dis Dress wrote:
    > On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 05:43:43 GMT, RoR <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    >
    >>I see absolutely no leeway for "friendly touching" among strangers, customers, employees,
    >>or co-workers. There is no such thing, and the line gets too blurred if any touching is
    >>allowed.

    >
    >
    > To throw this even further off-topic ... why is it that complete
    > strangers feel free to touch the bellies of pregnant women? I hated
    > that!


    aaargh! I didn't mind it so much when it was close friends and family,
    but yeah, it sucked when people I barely knew did that.

    --

    saerah

    "Peace is not an absence of war, it is a virtue, a state of mind, a
    disposition for benevolence, confidence, justice."
    -Baruch Spinoza

    "There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly
    what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear
    and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There
    is another theory which states that this has already happened."
    -Douglas Adams
     
  4. Ophelia

    Ophelia Guest

    "RoR" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]
    >
    > They should have defended you. They have a responsibility to treat you
    > with dignity and
    > respect and to defend you, especially since you informed them about
    > the situation. It's
    > not like they were blind-sided with the call.


    Rick, please will you explain 'blind-sided?
     
  5. Nancy Young

    Nancy Young Guest

    "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote

    > "RoR" <[email protected]> wrote


    >> They should have defended you. They have a responsibility to treat you
    >> with dignity and
    >> respect and to defend you, especially since you informed them about the
    >> situation. It's
    >> not like they were blind-sided with the call.

    >
    > Rick, please will you explain 'blind-sided?


    That's when you don't see something coming, it comes right
    outta the blue (you have that expression?) ... if she hadn't
    mentioned it and they had no clue what the customer was talking
    about when he called, that's blind sided, to them it came out of
    nowhere. Well, she did, and it didn't, they were aware why he
    was calling.

    Clear as mud? (smile)

    nancy.
     
  6. Ophelia

    Ophelia Guest

    "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]
    >
    > "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote
    >
    >> "RoR" <[email protected]> wrote

    >
    >>> They should have defended you. They have a responsibility to treat
    >>> you with dignity and
    >>> respect and to defend you, especially since you informed them about
    >>> the situation. It's
    >>> not like they were blind-sided with the call.

    >>
    >> Rick, please will you explain 'blind-sided?

    >
    > That's when you don't see something coming, it comes right
    > outta the blue (you have that expression?) ...


    Yes! Thank you:))

    if she hadn't
    > mentioned it and they had no clue what the customer was talking
    > about when he called, that's blind sided, to them it came out of
    > nowhere. Well, she did, and it didn't, they were aware why he
    > was calling.
    >
    > Clear as mud? (smile)


    LOL thanks nancy

    Perhaps you can clear up another mystery while you are at it?

    Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it
    goes something like 'I Jonesed it' ???
     
  7. Dave Smith

    Dave Smith Guest

    Edwin Pawlowski wrote:

    > Customers can be rude and obnixious, but there has to be a limit. As some
    > point you step up and take action.


    I am sure there is a limit. I just feel sorry for the poor salesclerk who
    underestimates that limit and ends up getting fired.

    > If i was being berated by a customer and
    > you allowed it to happen, you can be sure it was my last day on the job
    > becuase you are putting the sale ahead of my treatment. NO ONE should put
    > up with abuse as it just causes more of it to happen if enabled.


    Are we talking single incidents of abuse or the cumulative effects of being
    constantly berated? The problem is that some people have a dim view of people
    in some positions and consider them fair game for abuse. Coincidentally, the
    employers of those same people also consider them in the same light. A lot of
    retail owners fit that bill.

    > Why is it you can stand there with ticket book in hand and get justice, but
    > you don't think the retail clerks should be able to take control over a
    > situation?


    It is because I was an officer appointed to enforce the law and had a badge that
    gave me the authority. Don't take that as a smug answer. It was not as there
    was no accountability, because abuse of that authority could get me in trouble.
    The point is that that authority is what is missing with a clerk.
     
  8. "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    > Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it goes
    > something like 'I Jonesed it' ???


    It's a craving. I have no idea where the term comes from.
     
  9. Nancy Young

    Nancy Young Guest

    "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote

    > Perhaps you can clear up another mystery while you are at it?
    >
    > Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it goes
    > something like 'I Jonesed it' ???


    I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.

    I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict who
    needs a fix.

    nancy
     
  10. Ophelia

    Ophelia Guest

    "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]
    >
    > "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote
    >
    >> Perhaps you can clear up another mystery while you are at it?
    >>
    >> Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it
    >> goes something like 'I Jonesed it' ???

    >
    > I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.
    >
    > I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict who
    > needs a fix.


    Oh blimey!!!! But why Jones???
     
  11. Ophelia

    Ophelia Guest

    "Edwin Pawlowski" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:eek:c[email protected]
    >
    > "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    >> Jones! I can't remember exactly where it fits into a sentence but it
    >> goes something like 'I Jonesed it' ???

    >
    > It's a craving. I have no idea where the term comes from.


    Thanks Edwin:) I don't know about US but Jones is a common name in
    UK:))
     
  12. Nancy Young

    Nancy Young Guest

    "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote

    > "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote


    >> I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.
    >>
    >> I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict who
    >> needs a fix.

    >
    > Oh blimey!!!! But why Jones???


    Lost in the mists of time, most likely. And now I have that
    song stuck in my head, was it from that Bill Cosby cartoon,
    Fat Albert? Basketball jooooones, I got a basketball joooones.

    nancy
     
  13. Ophelia

    Ophelia Guest

    "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]
    >
    > "Ophelia" <[email protected]> wrote
    >
    >> "Nancy Young" <[email protected]> wrote

    >
    >>> I have a craving for it. I have a jones for pot roast.
    >>>
    >>> I think it might be out of the drug culture, like a heroin addict
    >>> who
    >>> needs a fix.

    >>
    >> Oh blimey!!!! But why Jones???

    >
    > Lost in the mists of time, most likely. And now I have that
    > song stuck in my head, was it from that Bill Cosby cartoon,
    > Fat Albert? Basketball jooooones, I got a basketball joooones.


    LOL, new one on me:))
     
  14. In article <[email protected]>,
    Dave Smith <[email protected]> wrote:

    > It is because I was an officer appointed to enforce the law and had a badge
    > that
    > gave me the authority. Don't take that as a smug answer. It was not as
    > there
    > was no accountability, because abuse of that authority could get me in
    > trouble.
    > The point is that that authority is what is missing with a clerk.



    But it should not be... :-(

    At least where I work, I have the option of calling for Security (the
    dudes with the badges) if I feel I'm being abused.

    Plus, I have the security of knowing that the entire thing is probably
    being videotaped by the security cameras. ;-) That way it's not just my
    word against theirs!
    --
    Om.

    "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson
     
  15. "Dave Smith" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    >
    > It is because I was an officer appointed to enforce the law and had a
    > badge that
    > gave me the authority. Don't take that as a smug answer. It was not as
    > there
    > was no accountability, because abuse of that authority could get me in
    > trouble.
    > The point is that that authority is what is missing with a clerk.


    The point is, the clerk should be empowered to take care of the really rude
    customers. There is no excuse for a person to be degraded by another. The
    boss should give some guidelines as there are some tough customers, but foul
    language should be a stopper. At the very least, the clerk should just
    walk away and get someone else to keep an eye on the customer. Simple
    guidelines: what if the clerk was your daughter or wife. How much do you
    expect them to endure?

    Take away your badge and ticket book, How much would you have put up with
    if you had no recourse for revenge?
     
  16. The Ranger

    The Ranger Guest

    On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 08:51:49 +0100, "jacqui{JB}"
    <[email protected]> replied:
    >"Damsel in dis Dress" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
    > > To throw this even further off-topic ... why is it
    > > that complete strangers feel free to touch the bellies
    > > of pregnant women? I hated that!


    When SWMBO was pregnant with Daughter-units Alpha and Beta, she
    was pooched straight out like she was a forklift with a couple of
    heavy beachballs. Many women would come up to her in the grocery
    store, at work, in restaurants, and quickly touch her stomach. It
    was shocking to me because I couldn't IMAGINE anyone invading her
    personal space without her directly giving them leave... To her,
    it was downright terrifying. It took a few time before I learned
    to judge who might and who might not be willing to come over and
    then I ran interference.

    > I cannot imagine what possesses some people. [..]


    It's supposed to be a way of transferring the positiveness of a
    pregnant woman's being fertile and passing some of that goodness
    on to the touchie. Or, in the case of the grandmotherly types,
    passing on some of their luck to the expectant mother. <shrug>
    Karmic values aside... It never hurt anyone to ask her first. It
    did when I was present and they self-invited, though.

    The Ranger
     
  17. The Ranger

    The Ranger Guest

    On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 11:59:58 GMT, "Ophelia" <[email protected]>
    replied:
    [snip]
    >Jones! [..]


    To want something in an uncontrollably compulsive way. "I was
    Jonesin' for a piece of that Chocolate Decadence Instant Death!"

    The Ranger
     
  18. The Ranger

    The Ranger Guest

    On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 07:49:58 -0500, Dave Smith
    <[email protected]> replied:
    >Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
    > > Customers can be rude and obnixious, but there has to be a limit.
    > > As some point you step up and take action.
    > >

    > I am sure there is a limit. I just feel sorry for the poor salesclerk who
    >underestimates that limit and ends up getting fired.


    Sales clerks are a dime-a-dozen. Experienced sales clerks,
    regardless of the merchandise being hawked, are no higher on the
    ladder.

    A sale -- regardless of how obnoxious the customer -- brings in
    moneys to continue providing the service or items. A back-sassing
    sales clerk will chase customers away. And a second-hand account
    (like what was provided in the OP) will have only minor support.
    Unless the owner _sees_ it firsthand, he can't do anything beyond
    what he's already done; listen to the employee and continue the
    sale.

    The Ranger
     
  19. Curly Sue

    Curly Sue Guest

    On Sat, 17 Dec 2005 16:01:48 -0500, Julia Altshuler
    <[email protected]> wrote:

    <snip>
    >
    >This is a young lady I really like. She's young (22), quite pretty,
    >very nice, the sort of kid who can talk to and make friends with people
    >who are older (I'm 47) and be lovely and genuine. She has an infectious
    >laugh and bright smile. I could understand that young men might think
    >she was flirting, but it's hard to help it when you're that pretty. She
    >could model. (She has professional dance and acting experience.) It
    >turns out that the customer has been hitting on her. She said it
    >started out O.K. with him just talking to her, but most recently he's
    >been asking her out and making comments of the "if I were younger"
    >variety, not of the kindly old man gently teases with young woman old
    >enough to be his granddaughter, but more of the middle aged man makes
    >young woman uncomfortable variety. She said that the next time he comes
    >in, she's heading for the bathroom and staying there.
    >
    >This leads me to the question I'm opening for discussion. What are the
    >limits? I know what I'd put up with from a boss, but I've never
    >wondered before about what I'm expected to put up with from a customer.
    > You read all the time about sexual harrassment from a boss, but what
    >about from a customer? The boss (a nice guy who can get grouchy but who
    >has never been mean or unfair, someone who is actually more likely to
    >get himself into trouble for being a pushover) hasn't given us any
    >guidelines except the nothing illegal one. Any thoughts?


    She'd better learn to handle this type of situation. First of all,
    nothing indicates that the guy is sexually harassing her. He's
    flirting with her and seeing if she is responsive. Don't blame him;
    if you are able to see how the fellow might think that she's
    flirtatious, then what is he supposed to think? Maybe he thinks she
    IS interested in him and, from his POV, why not?

    If she doesn't want that type of reaction, perhaps taking on a more
    business-like demeanor with customers might help.

    At this point, if she wants to sent a boundary with this guy, all she
    has to do is look him in the eye and firmly say "Sorry, I've got a
    boyfriend."

    I'm not saying the guy isn't a jerk, he sounds like it. But she's a
    big girl. Age 22 is old enough to grow up and take responsibility for
    setting the tone of the interaction rather than hiding and blaming
    customers for harassment.

    Sue(tm)
    Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!
     
  20. Curly Sue

    Curly Sue Guest

    On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 00:01:07 -0600, Damsel in dis Dress
    <[email protected]> wrote:

    >On Sun, 18 Dec 2005 05:43:43 GMT, RoR <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    >> I see absolutely no leeway for "friendly touching" among strangers, customers, employees,
    >> or co-workers. There is no such thing, and the line gets too blurred if any touching is
    >> allowed.

    >
    >To throw this even further off-topic ... why is it that complete
    >strangers feel free to touch the bellies of pregnant women? I hated
    >that!
    >

    Funny you should say that- I saw a home improvement show Friday where
    one of the (female) show workers did that to the homeowner. I was
    really surprized but thought that perhaps they cleared it ahead of
    time with the mother-to-be.

    Sue(tm)
    Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!
     
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