poodling effectively



BikingBrian

New Member
Sep 25, 2003
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Behold: PoodleCranks(*), a revolutionary new crank system which forces you to poodle in circles. The miniature Poodles make each leg work harder as you lift and try to balance the Poodles on each foot. After 3 months of usage, most users show a 40% improvement(**) in Poodle Power!

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(*Miniature Poodles not included)
(** evidence of greater power production not verified)
 

jhuskey

Moderator
Oct 6, 2003
10,606
678
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Looks like a great way to "groom" your technique and "unleash" your full power.A perfect way to do it "doggy style".
 

Sillyoldtwit

Member
Jan 13, 2006
1,647
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LET'S HEAR IT FOR POODLECRANKS!
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PoodleCranks were developed with dogged and Frank determination after barking up the wrong tree with Golden Uglycranks. It's been so doggone long since cranks of this calibre have hit the market. Guys believe me, these cranks are hot, in fact I placed an order today for 2 hotdogs after J. Everglades swore by them.
The man at the factory - Mr. Honestday told me the lead time from manufacture to delivery was 2 Days. I think these cranks will collar the market. Having said that, I foresee a couple of possible problems. The Poodle cranks could turn into Piddlecranks upon passing a lampost or lord forbid, in the middle of a crit turning into Poopoocranks. Should this happen , you'll be right in the s..t.

I do also worry about the weight of these cranks, I can imagine one being dog-tired after using them in a long road race. Of course if there is more than one rider using Poodlecranks in a race, a dogfight could develop.
Btw, I called the factory again for more information, and a guy who I think was just a general dogsbody ( Mr. Honestday was attending a forum), told me that the Poodlecranks come complete with a doggy bag and a packet of distemper powder.

But remember - if you are successful with these cranks you will become a Dog Star!

Copyright. Tyson :D
 

swampy1970

Well-Known Member
Feb 3, 2008
10,098
426
83
I call "crankism" here. The obvious hatred of overly large, bronze colored cranks. We have one mod lock a thread about cranks and another mod actively participating in another.

Someone oughta form a civil rights group, burn down some houses, overturn cars that block our path and march on Washington I tell ya!!!

BikingBrian said:
Behold: PoodleCranks(*), a revolutionary new crank system which forces you to poodle in circles. The miniature Poodles make each leg work harder as you lift and try to balance the Poodles on each foot. After 3 months of usage, most users show a 40% improvement(**) in Poodle Power!

attachment.php


(*Miniature Poodles not included)
(** evidence of greater power production not verified)

Dude, you got the limited edition that came with the Pinarello Dogma?
 

BikingBrian

New Member
Sep 25, 2003
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:p:p:p
Tyson, I thought I was the only one who was barking mad, doggone it, you've completely outclassed me, you are definitely Top Dog!
 

Sillyoldtwit

Member
Jan 13, 2006
1,647
6
38
BikingBrian said:
:p:p:p
Tyson, I thought I was the only one who was barking mad, doggone it, you've completely outclassed me, you are definitely Top Dog!

Yeah BB, I've been lying a bit doggo lately, because of the dog-eat-dog attitude in the powercrank threads. The posters in said threads are so dogmatic in their opinions.
I was wondering, do these PoodleCranks come into their own on a dog-leg course? Still, if you lost it on a steep downhill and ended up in a deep river, you can always doggy-paddle your way to the bank. ;)
 

frenchyge

New Member
Apr 3, 2005
4,687
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0
BikingBrian said:
After 3 months of usage, most users show a 40% improvement(**) in Poodle Power!

Independent "Lab" tests show no evidence of improved power from poodle-cranking over any other type.

url
 

jhuskey

Moderator
Oct 6, 2003
10,606
678
113
Poodle Cranks require a properly neutered BB to allow proper unleashing of torque.If this is not done each rotation(roll over) will simply play dead.
You can either install them correctly or you are just chasing your own tail.
 

swampy1970

Well-Known Member
Feb 3, 2008
10,098
426
83
swampy1970 said:
I call "crankism" here. The obvious hatred of overly large, bronze colored cranks. We have one mod lock a thread about cranks and another mod actively participating in another.

Someone oughta form a civil rights group, burn down some houses, overturn cars that block our path and march on Washington I tell ya!!!



Dude, you got the limited edition that came with the Pinarello Dogma?

Last edited by cyberlegend1994; 9 Hours Ago at 08:49 PM. Reason: Merged posts.

Now cyberlegend is just being peedantic.

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Merged posts... :p