Question about setting goals.

Discussion in 'Food and nutrition' started by WannaBLean, Feb 29, 2004.

  1. WannaBLean

    WannaBLean Guest

    Several questions actually....

    1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    regularly.

    2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    if you don't reach your goal?

    3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose 100
    pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to break down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do
    I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran
    failure and I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself at goal
    before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill, but I can't just keep "hoping
    for a loss" each week and expect to be successful. I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone?
    Thanks in advance.
     
    Tags:


  2. Fred

    Fred Guest

    WW suggests a loss of 1 to 2 pounds per week and that should help you frame a reasonable goal but
    also remember that everyone has their own body which may respond to all the patterns and eating and
    water and exercise differently. I allowed WW to merely set a 10% goal - that is lose 10% of current,
    starting weight. BUT there was no time limit.

    It varied from week to week and I was always happy with the result but never really knew what to
    expect - at the beginning I did not weigh myself at home so it was always an unknown. (I think I was
    one of the lucky ones and possibly unusual in losing something each week)

    The actual goal that matched my height was something that was too far away and frankly, I did not
    expect to reach it - I thought it was not possible and I just wanted to lose about 20 or 30 pounds
    so the WW goal was not something I really put much stock in. I even got a doc's note when I was
    there for another reason for a higher weight.

    I did not initially join any of the challenges you will see here. When I did, I fashioned my goal
    based on my real loses and did not inflate them or try for anything unreasonable. As you say, you
    do not want to set yourself up for failure. You want a reasonable objective which for many is
    just to stick with the program and not pin your hopes on any specific outcome. There are the
    birthday and anniversary and xmas dinners and vacations which all may throw a monkeywrench into
    things on occasion. Just go with the flow and get back on program at the next meal, day, week or
    after vacation.

    Again, everyone is different and loses at a different rate. But the program works if you stick with
    it. So don't even stress over an interim objective other than trying as best as possible to stay
    with the program and change habits to accommodate them.

    Fred
    219.2/158.8/164. (Lifetime July 2003) Started WW: Oct 29, 2002

    On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote:

    >Several questions actually....
    >
    >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    > each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    > regularly.
    >
    >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    > if you don't reach your goal?
    >
    >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose 100
    > pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to break down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do
    > I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran
    > failure and I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself at goal
    > before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill, but I can't just keep "hoping
    > for a loss" each week and expect to be successful. I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone?
    > Thanks in advance.
     
  3. Skiur

    Skiur Guest

    "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > Several questions actually....
    >
    > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    > each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    > regularly.

    To me, the number isn't the goal. Each person's body loses weigh differently and it's not a race. My
    first goal was to journal everything that went into my mouth and be aware of how my body felt when I
    was eating (was I eating to fill myself up because I was hurt, was I eating because it just tasted
    good and I wasn't hungry any more, things like that). I didn't count points or calories. My next
    goal was to maintain the journal and then stop eating when I was satisfied (read: not feeling like I
    ate too much). Then I'd make goals like swapping out one different meal a day for something
    healthier.

    >
    > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    > if you don't reach your
    goal?

    If my goal wasn't met, I'd try a different goal until I found one that I could meet. I take baby
    steps because I don't want to set myself up for failing because I am too hard on myself. Losing
    weight isn't like flipping a switch and turning on willpower mode.

    Before I set my goal, I ask myself what little step would I be happy to accomplish this week. Then I
    try to accomplish it-like drinking enough water each day or not eating after a certain hour of the
    night, etc.

    Just remember that you didn't gain the food habits that you currently have overnight, so you're not
    going to break them and melt the weight off overnight either. This one is hard for me because I want
    to see a day's effort of being good pay off instantly and it doesn't work that way.

    >
    > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose
    > 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    and
    > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.

    You don't sound dumb. You sound like someone who wants to do something about their weight and that
    is your first Non Scale Victory (NSV). Losing weight isn't about a diet. It's about making food
    choices that you can live with for the rest of your life. Some days are better than others.

    As far as breaking down your mini-goals, you can do it in 5 pound increments, percentages, certain
    numbers, etc. I won't post my starting weight/current weight/goal weight until I reach under a
    certain number because I'm embarassed to have gotten back to that number. Whatever you think is
    easiest for you and whatever goal will make you happy for making it to that goal. I know it sounds
    circular, but this change is really all about you and what you want.

    I think you need to start recording everything you eat, including the portion size, etc. If you
    don't have a food scale, just try to give it an approximate size (like a deck of card, the size of
    your fist, whatever). Don't worry about the calories/points at first. If you lick something off your
    finger, record it. If you catch yourself eating something that you didn't record before you ate it,
    record it then. Also record your beverage intake (water, caffeinated beverages, sweeteners/creams in
    your coffee, etc).

    I also think that your first NSV should be to forgive yourself for eating too much of (insert food
    here) and not kick yourself then not eat whatever is next in your spiral. You'll be doing yourself a
    big favor with that one all around.

    I'll probably have more to add tomorrow, but the letters are starting to swim on the screen.

    Night, Julie
     
  4. Lesanne

    Lesanne Guest

    Very good post, my answers are in the middle of it.....
    "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > Several questions actually....
    >
    > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    > each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    > regularly.

    *****for me, goal setting and rewards were very important. I set goals for behaviors, so many days
    of keeping my journal, drinking the water, etc, since losing was not going to happen every week. The
    rewards were specific, planned for every 5 pounds lost, written out, and purchased without fail.
    >
    > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    > if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    ***********This time around when I did not meet a goal, I looked at the sign on my refrigerator that
    said "quit tomorrow" and I jumped right back on program. I told myself that humans are Human, and
    that I never met a person at goal who said they never went off program. They just did not allow it
    to stop them. I am the worlds worst perfectionist, but I can tell you from here at Goal, the major
    thing I did differently this time was allow myself to be human, and not get down.

    > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose
    > 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    and
    > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    **********I averaged a little over a pound a week. Others are faster. I got here, and have
    maintained now for 6 months. I think the way I learned to deal with actual life happening over the
    18 months it took me to lose the last 80 pounds of the 200 something I lost, were invaluable.
    Looking back it seems like no time at all. I Had specific behaviors though. I did not "hope" for a
    loss. I planned for one. On paper. When I didn't get it, I was able to look back at written weeks
    where I Had gotten it, to inspire me.
     
  5. WannaBLean

    WannaBLean Guest

    WOW! You guys are GREAT! And I am happy to report that I DID NOT have
    pizza at parent-teacher conference tonight. Not because I couldn't have it
    points-wise, but just because turning it down made me feel strong. :) I mean
    it you guys. I AM GOING TO DO IT THIS TIME!! I know y'all believe I will,
    too. :)
    "Lesanne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > Very good post, my answers are in the middle of it..... "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote in
    > message news:[email protected]...
    > > Several questions actually....
    > >
    > > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have
    just
    > > been "hoping for a loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is
    > > something some of you do regularly.
    >
    > *****for me, goal setting and rewards were very important. I set goals
    for
    > behaviors, so many days of keeping my journal, drinking the water, etc, since losing was not going
    > to happen every week. The rewards were
    specific,
    > planned for every 5 pounds lost, written out, and purchased without fail.
    > >
    > > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want
    > > to fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to
    do
    > > thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope" if you don't reach your
    > goal?
    > >
    > ***********This time around when I did not meet a goal, I looked at the
    sign
    > on my refrigerator that said "quit tomorrow" and I jumped right back on program. I told myself
    > that humans are Human, and that I never met a
    person
    > at goal who said they never went off program. They just did not allow it
    to
    > stop them. I am the worlds worst perfectionist, but I can tell you from here at Goal, the major
    > thing I did differently this time was allow myself to be human, and not get down.
    >
    > > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > > KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    > break
    > > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > > it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    > and
    > > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    > at
    > > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    > but
    > > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    > successful.
    > > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    > >
    > **********I averaged a little over a pound a week. Others are faster. I got here, and have
    > maintained now for 6 months. I think the way I learned to deal with actual life happening over the
    > 18 months it took me to lose
    the
    > last 80 pounds of the 200 something I lost, were invaluable. Looking back it seems like no time at
    > all. I Had specific behaviors though. I did not "hope" for a loss. I planned for one. On paper.
    > When I didn't get it, I was able to look back at written weeks where I Had gotten it, to inspire
    me.
    >
    >
     
  6. Lesanne

    Lesanne Guest

    Great job on the pizza. And yes, I know you are going to make it, you are asking for help when you
    need it, and not Quitting. You don't need another thing.!!

    "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > WOW! You guys are GREAT! And I am happy to report that I DID NOT have pizza at parent-teacher
    > conference tonight. Not because I couldn't have it points-wise, but just because turning it down
    > made me feel strong. :) I
    mean
    > it you guys. I AM GOING TO DO IT THIS TIME!! I know y'all believe I will, too. :) "Lesanne"
    > <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > > Very good post, my answers are in the middle of it..... "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote
    > > in message news:[email protected]...
    > > > Several questions actually....
    > > >
    > > > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have
    > just
    > > > been "hoping for a loss" each week, but from some of your posts I
    gather
    > > > that goal-setting is something some of you do regularly.
    > >
    > > *****for me, goal setting and rewards were very important. I set goals
    > for
    > > behaviors, so many days of keeping my journal, drinking the water, etc, since losing was not
    > > going to happen every week. The rewards were
    > specific,
    > > planned for every 5 pounds lost, written out, and purchased without
    fail.
    > > >
    > > > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself
    mentally
    > > > anyway and don't want to fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to
    > do
    > > > thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope" if you don't reach your
    > > goal?
    > > >
    > > ***********This time around when I did not meet a goal, I looked at the
    > sign
    > > on my refrigerator that said "quit tomorrow" and I jumped right back on program. I told myself
    > > that humans are Human, and that I never met a
    > person
    > > at goal who said they never went off program. They just did not allow
    it
    > to
    > > stop them. I am the worlds worst perfectionist, but I can tell you from here at Goal, the major
    > > thing I did differently this time was allow
    myself
    > > to be human, and not get down.
    > >
    > > > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term,
    as
    > I
    > > > KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    > > break
    > > > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry
    to
    > > > sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran
    failure
    > > and
    > > > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing
    myself
    > > at
    > > > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the
    treadmill,
    > > but
    > > > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    > > successful.
    > > > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    > > >
    > > **********I averaged a little over a pound a week. Others are faster.
    I
    > > got here, and have maintained now for 6 months. I think the way I
    learned
    > > to deal with actual life happening over the 18 months it took me to lose
    > the
    > > last 80 pounds of the 200 something I lost, were invaluable. Looking
    back
    > > it seems like no time at all. I Had specific behaviors though. I did
    not
    > > "hope" for a loss. I planned for one. On paper. When I didn't get it,
    I
    > > was able to look back at written weeks where I Had gotten it, to inspire
    > me.
    > >
    > > >
    > >
    >
     
  7. On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]>
    wrote:

    >Several questions actually....
    >
    >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    > each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    > regularly.

    I'm always grateful for any loss, even a maintain. I set undated mini weight goals for myself
    because it keeps me focused. Kinda like following a trail of bread crumbs in the forest when the end
    of the trail is too far ahead. I just have to get from one mini-goal to the next. I've set mini-
    goals that are meaningful to me, usually 2-3 lbs apart, just far enough that I have to work for
    them, not so far that I can't reach them in a couple of weeks. Since fluctuations and special
    occasions are part of life I don't sweat over reaching them by a particular date.

    >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    > if you don't reach your goal?

    One thing I do is tell myself that a bad day is just that: a bad day. It's not a reflection of my
    worth as a human being.

    Also, since I don't attach dates to my mini-goals, other than the goal set for the group challenges,
    I don't usually have to do much "coping" with unmet goals. But that isn't to say I've never been
    disappointed. The support and encouragement of this group has certainly helped me to be more
    forgiving and patient with myself. More and more I'm able to accept that as long as I don't quit,
    I'm not failing. That every maintain or gain is as much a part of the journey as every loss. Heck, I
    call myself a lifetimer already, because I intend to follow this way of eating for life. In that
    sense, I'm already at goal!

    >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose 100
    > pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to break down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do
    > I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran
    > failure and I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself at goal
    > before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill, but I can't just keep "hoping
    > for a loss" each week and expect to be successful. I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone?
    > Thanks in advance.

    I can only say what has helped me. From the beginning, I've had a hard time thinking of myself as
    thin or normal weight. I don't even know what normal weight is. That's one reason the mini-goals
    help. I can imagine weighing 2, 3, 5 lbs less than now. But sometimes even 10 lbs lighter is hard to
    imagine. When I think now at having lost 70+ lbs to date, I can hardly believe it. So for me,
    visualizing success has had little to do with my actual success. For a long time, I thought that in
    order to be thin, I first had to have worked through all the emotional and psychological issues that
    kept me overeating and fat. I suppose I have done that, to a certain extent. But at some point, I
    came to realize that I can be thin and crazy. Several years ago, I was in Overeaters Anonymous. Some
    of the OA sayings help me now: "Do the work and the results will follow." "It works if you work it."
    "Progress not perfection."

    What I appreciate about WW is that there are as many ways to work the program as there are people in
    the program. If visualizing thinness is what works for you, then do that. But don't sweat it if it
    doesn't. Just try something else.

    This is what I believe: The only failure is to quit. As long as you're trying, you're making
    progress. You only have to do this one day at a time.

    You're asking yourself the hard questions and working through the answers. In my mind, that's the
    best indicator of success. You can do this!

    Linda P
    232/159.6/WW goal 145 joined WW Online 22-Feb-2003
     
  8. Skiur

    Skiur Guest

    Great post Linda! -Julie

    "Prairie Roots" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    > >Several questions actually....
    > >
    > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a
    > > loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of
    > > you do regularly.
    >
    > I'm always grateful for any loss, even a maintain. I set undated mini weight goals for myself
    > because it keeps me focused. Kinda like following a trail of bread crumbs in the forest when the
    > end of the trail is too far ahead. I just have to get from one mini-goal to the next. I've set mini-
    > goals that are meaningful to me, usually 2-3 lbs apart, just far enough that I have to work for
    > them, not so far that I can't reach them in a couple of weeks. Since fluctuations and special
    > occasions are part of life I don't sweat over reaching them by a particular date.
    >
    > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you
    > > "cope" if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    > One thing I do is tell myself that a bad day is just that: a bad day. It's not a reflection of my
    > worth as a human being.
    >
    > Also, since I don't attach dates to my mini-goals, other than the goal set for the group
    > challenges, I don't usually have to do much "coping" with unmet goals. But that isn't to say I've
    > never been disappointed. The support and encouragement of this group has certainly helped me to be
    > more forgiving and patient with myself. More and more I'm able to accept that as long as I don't
    > quit, I'm not failing. That every maintain or gain is as much a part of the journey as every loss.
    > Heck, I call myself a lifetimer already, because I intend to follow this way of eating for life.
    > In that sense, I'm already at goal!
    >
    > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > >it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    and
    > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    > I can only say what has helped me. From the beginning, I've had a hard time thinking of myself as
    > thin or normal weight. I don't even know what normal weight is. That's one reason the mini-goals
    > help. I can imagine weighing 2, 3, 5 lbs less than now. But sometimes even 10 lbs lighter is hard
    > to imagine. When I think now at having lost 70+ lbs to date, I can hardly believe it. So for me,
    > visualizing success has had little to do with my actual success. For a long time, I thought that
    > in order to be thin, I first had to have worked through all the emotional and psychological issues
    > that kept me overeating and fat. I suppose I have done that, to a certain extent. But at some
    > point, I came to realize that I can be thin and crazy. Several years ago, I was in Overeaters
    > Anonymous. Some of the OA sayings help me now: "Do the work and the results will follow." "It
    > works if you work it." "Progress not perfection."
    >
    > What I appreciate about WW is that there are as many ways to work the program as there are people
    > in the program. If visualizing thinness is what works for you, then do that. But don't sweat it if
    > it doesn't. Just try something else.
    >
    > This is what I believe: The only failure is to quit. As long as you're trying, you're making
    > progress. You only have to do this one day at a time.
    >
    > You're asking yourself the hard questions and working through the answers. In my mind, that's the
    > best indicator of success. You can do this!
    >
    > Linda P
    > 232/159.6/WW goal 145 joined WW Online 22-Feb-2003
     
  9. In answer to question 1, I should also have clarified that my mini-goals are more like mini-
    milestones. They're a means for to mark my progress. I also take my measurements once a month for
    the same reason. (I don't have any measurement goals! I have no idea what shape my body really is.)
    I also mark off my progress by making a paper clip chain, one clip per pound. To make it even more
    impressive, I use 2" clips. My paper clip chain hangs on my office cubicle wall and it's now 144"
    long. Now THAT'S visual! <G>

    Linda P

    On Mon, 01 Mar 2004 21:45:25 -0600, Prairie Roots <[email protected]> wrote:

    >On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    >>Several questions actually....
    >>
    >>1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    >> each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    >> regularly.
    >
    >I'm always grateful for any loss, even a maintain. I set undated mini weight goals for myself
    >because it keeps me focused. Kinda like following a trail of bread crumbs in the forest when the
    >end of the trail is too far ahead. I just have to get from one mini-goal to the next. I've set mini-
    >goals that are meaningful to me, usually 2-3 lbs apart, just far enough that I have to work for
    >them, not so far that I can't reach them in a couple of weeks. Since fluctuations and special
    >occasions are part of life I don't sweat over reaching them by a particular date.
    >
    >>2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    >> fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    >> if you don't reach your goal?
    >
    >One thing I do is tell myself that a bad day is just that: a bad day. It's not a reflection of my
    >worth as a human being.
    >
    >Also, since I don't attach dates to my mini-goals, other than the goal set for the group
    >challenges, I don't usually have to do much "coping" with unmet goals. But that isn't to say I've
    >never been disappointed. The support and encouragement of this group has certainly helped me to be
    >more forgiving and patient with myself. More and more I'm able to accept that as long as I don't
    >quit, I'm not failing. That every maintain or gain is as much a part of the journey as every loss.
    >Heck, I call myself a lifetimer already, because I intend to follow this way of eating for life. In
    >that sense, I'm already at goal!
    >
    >>3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose
    >> 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to break down that 100 pounds into mini-goals,
    >> how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a
    >> veteran failure and I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself at
    >> goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill, but I can't just keep
    >> "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be successful. I know myself too well. Any advice?
    >> Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    >I can only say what has helped me. From the beginning, I've had a hard time thinking of myself as
    >thin or normal weight. I don't even know what normal weight is. That's one reason the mini-goals
    >help. I can imagine weighing 2, 3, 5 lbs less than now. But sometimes even 10 lbs lighter is hard
    >to imagine. When I think now at having lost 70+ lbs to date, I can hardly believe it. So for me,
    >visualizing success has had little to do with my actual success. For a long time, I thought that in
    >order to be thin, I first had to have worked through all the emotional and psychological issues
    >that kept me overeating and fat. I suppose I have done that, to a certain extent. But at some
    >point, I came to realize that I can be thin and crazy. Several years ago, I was in Overeaters
    >Anonymous. Some of the OA sayings help me now: "Do the work and the results will follow." "It works
    >if you work it." "Progress not perfection."
    >
    >What I appreciate about WW is that there are as many ways to work the program as there are people
    >in the program. If visualizing thinness is what works for you, then do that. But don't sweat it if
    >it doesn't. Just try something else.
    >
    >This is what I believe: The only failure is to quit. As long as you're trying, you're making
    >progress. You only have to do this one day at a time.
    >
    >You're asking yourself the hard questions and working through the answers. In my mind, that's the
    >best indicator of success. You can do this!
    >
    >Linda P
    >232/159.6/WW goal 145 joined WW Online 22-Feb-2003
     
  10. Joyce

    Joyce Guest

    On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote:

    >Several questions actually....
    >
    >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    > each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    > regularly.

    Importance depends on the individual. For me it was important, otherwise all I had to look ahead to
    was that final number ... which was close to 100 pounds away and very daunting. But setting up mini-
    goals along the way, I didn't look at the final goal. I only looked ahead to the next few pounds.
    THIS I knew I could accomplish. Keep things in a positive mode.

    >
    >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    > if you don't reach your goal?

    I didn't set up time frames for my goals, only milestone markers. This way there never was a goal
    that wasn't met. Some may have taken longer, but eventually they were reached. So there really
    wasn't any negative issues for me to cope with along the way either.

    >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose 100
    > pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to break down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do
    > I go about it?

    Again, move away from the time frames, only use markers. I had mine set up at a few pound intervals
    ... some 10%'s, some new decades, whatever numbers strike your fancy or seem important to you. For
    example, I started out at 228 so of course ww suggested my first mini-goal be 10%. Well, that was 28
    pounds - pretty daunting for me. So for me, my first goal was to reach the two-teens ... then two-
    0's ... then onederland ... then 10%. After that I may have moved into more 5 pound mini-goals as
    the weightlosses were a bit slower than in the beginning. Mixing in a second 10%, third 10% and
    those mini-goals were sometimes even just a pound apart. There was always something to look forward
    to, always something to keep me motivated, and they were small enough to always seem possible. I
    never said *in 2

    me to fail then, was to quit.

    >I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure and I am
    >admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself at goal before going to sleep
    >at night and while walking on the treadmill, but I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week
    >and expect to be successful. I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.

    You don't sound dumb at all! Asking for help is why we all are here. If we didn't need help, we
    probably wouldn't have ended up having to lose the weight. I don't know how to get past hoping
    for those losses as I think we all still do it from time to time. Right now my scale is showing
    me up a few pounds, yes, I am hoping for losses. It's normal. But I do think the mini-
    goal/milestone approach may be perfect for you, might get your mind off the *big picture* which
    seems so terribly daunting.

    Joyce
     
  11. LuvDaVols

    LuvDaVols Guest

    I appreciate these wonderful answers and this wonderful supportive group. I
    never felt THIS accepted at WW meetings!
    "Joyce" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]>
    wrote:
    >
    > >Several questions actually....
    > >
    > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a
    > > loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of
    > > you do regularly.
    >
    > Importance depends on the individual. For me it was important, otherwise
    all I
    > had to look ahead to was that final number ... which was close to 100
    pounds away
    > and very daunting. But setting up mini-goals along the way, I didn't look
    at the
    > final goal. I only looked ahead to the next few pounds. THIS I knew I
    could
    > accomplish. Keep things in a positive mode.
    >
    > >
    > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you
    > > "cope" if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    > I didn't set up time frames for my goals, only milestone markers. This
    way there
    > never was a goal that wasn't met. Some may have taken longer, but
    eventually they
    > were reached. So there really wasn't any negative issues for me to cope
    with
    > along the way either.
    >
    > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it?
    >
    > Again, move away from the time frames, only use markers. I had mine set
    up at a
    > few pound intervals ... some 10%'s, some new decades, whatever numbers
    strike your
    > fancy or seem important to you. For example, I started out at 228 so of
    course ww
    > suggested my first mini-goal be 10%. Well, that was 28 pounds - pretty
    daunting
    > for me. So for me, my first goal was to reach the two-teens ... then
    two-0's ...
    > then onederland ... then 10%. After that I may have moved into more 5
    pound
    > mini-goals as the weightlosses were a bit slower than in the beginning.
    Mixing in
    > a second 10%, third 10% and those mini-goals were sometimes even just a
    pound
    > apart. There was always something to look forward to, always something to
    keep me
    > motivated, and they were small enough to always seem possible. I never
    said *in 2

    way for
    > me to fail then, was to quit.
    >
    >
    > >I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a
    veteran failure and
    > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    > You don't sound dumb at all! Asking for help is why we all are here. If
    we
    > didn't need help, we probably wouldn't have ended up having to lose the
    weight. I
    > don't know how to get past hoping for those losses as I think we all still
    do it
    > from time to time. Right now my scale is showing me up a few pounds, yes,
    I am
    > hoping for losses. It's normal. But I do think the mini-goal/milestone
    approach
    > may be perfect for you, might get your mind off the *big picture* which
    seems so
    > terribly daunting.
    >
    > Joyce
    >
    >
     
  12. LuvDaVols

    LuvDaVols Guest

    I appreciate these wonderful answers and this wonderful supportive group. I
    never felt THIS accepted at WW meetings!
    "Joyce" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]>
    wrote:
    >
    > >Several questions actually....
    > >
    > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a
    > > loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of
    > > you do regularly.
    >
    > Importance depends on the individual. For me it was important, otherwise
    all I
    > had to look ahead to was that final number ... which was close to 100
    pounds away
    > and very daunting. But setting up mini-goals along the way, I didn't look
    at the
    > final goal. I only looked ahead to the next few pounds. THIS I knew I
    could
    > accomplish. Keep things in a positive mode.
    >
    > >
    > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you
    > > "cope" if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    > I didn't set up time frames for my goals, only milestone markers. This
    way there
    > never was a goal that wasn't met. Some may have taken longer, but
    eventually they
    > were reached. So there really wasn't any negative issues for me to cope
    with
    > along the way either.
    >
    > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it?
    >
    > Again, move away from the time frames, only use markers. I had mine set
    up at a
    > few pound intervals ... some 10%'s, some new decades, whatever numbers
    strike your
    > fancy or seem important to you. For example, I started out at 228 so of
    course ww
    > suggested my first mini-goal be 10%. Well, that was 28 pounds - pretty
    daunting
    > for me. So for me, my first goal was to reach the two-teens ... then
    two-0's ...
    > then onederland ... then 10%. After that I may have moved into more 5
    pound
    > mini-goals as the weightlosses were a bit slower than in the beginning.
    Mixing in
    > a second 10%, third 10% and those mini-goals were sometimes even just a
    pound
    > apart. There was always something to look forward to, always something to
    keep me
    > motivated, and they were small enough to always seem possible. I never
    said *in 2

    way for
    > me to fail then, was to quit.
    >
    >
    > >I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a
    veteran failure and
    > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    > You don't sound dumb at all! Asking for help is why we all are here. If
    we
    > didn't need help, we probably wouldn't have ended up having to lose the
    weight. I
    > don't know how to get past hoping for those losses as I think we all still
    do it
    > from time to time. Right now my scale is showing me up a few pounds, yes,
    I am
    > hoping for losses. It's normal. But I do think the mini-goal/milestone
    approach
    > may be perfect for you, might get your mind off the *big picture* which
    seems so
    > terribly daunting.
    >
    > Joyce
    >
    >
     
  13. I can't deal with the whole amount I need to lose so I just keep setting
    another ten percent, I figure out how I have lost in the past to set a time
    line for the losses. I use this as a guideline as the goal is to eventually
    lose the ten percent no matter how long it takes, I also check each week to
    see how much more I have to lose to get the next five pound star and how
    long I have to go before I get another magnet. The point is to deal with it
    in a way that is not discouraging. I got a tip from someone at a meeting
    that has helped me, this woman said she looks at her booklet every four
    weeks, and if she has lost anything then it has been a successful month,
    good luck, Lee
    WannaBLean <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > Several questions actually....
    >
    > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a loss"
    > each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of you do
    > regularly.
    >
    > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope"
    > if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as I KNOW I will not lose
    > 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    and
    > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
     
  14. great post, Lee
    Fred <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > WW suggests a loss of 1 to 2 pounds per week and that should help you frame a reasonable goal but
    > also remember that everyone has their own body which may respond to all the patterns and eating
    > and water and exercise differently. I allowed WW to merely set a 10% goal - that is lose 10% of
    > current, starting weight. BUT there was no time limit.
    >
    > It varied from week to week and I was always happy with the result but never really knew what to
    > expect - at the beginning I did not weigh myself at home so it was always an unknown. (I think I
    > was one of the lucky ones and possibly unusual in losing something each week)
    >
    > The actual goal that matched my height was something that was too far away and frankly, I did not
    > expect to reach it - I thought it was not possible and I just wanted to lose about 20 or 30 pounds
    > so the WW goal was not something I really put much stock in. I even got a doc's note when I was
    > there for another reason for a higher weight.
    >
    > I did not initially join any of the challenges you will see here. When I did, I fashioned my goal
    > based on my real loses and did not inflate them or try for anything unreasonable. As you say, you
    > do not want to set yourself up for failure. You want a reasonable objective which for many is just
    > to stick with the program and not pin your hopes on any specific outcome. There are the birthday
    > and anniversary and xmas dinners and vacations which all may throw a monkeywrench into things on
    > occasion. Just go with the flow and get back on program at the next meal, day, week or after
    > vacation.
    >
    > Again, everyone is different and loses at a different rate. But the program works if you stick
    > with it. So don't even stress over an interim objective other than trying as best as possible to
    > stay with the program and change habits to accommodate them.
    >
    > Fred
    > 219.2/158.8/164. (Lifetime July 2003) Started WW: Oct 29, 2002
    >
    >
    >
    > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    > >Several questions actually....
    > >
    > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a
    > > loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of
    > > you do regularly.
    > >
    > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you
    > > "cope" if you don't reach your
    goal?
    > >
    > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > >it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    and
    > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
     
  15. this entire thread is great, Lee
    Lesanne <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected].texas.rr.com...
    > Very good post, my answers are in the middle of it..... "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote in
    > message news:[email protected]...
    > > Several questions actually....
    > >
    > > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have
    just
    > > been "hoping for a loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is
    > > something some of you do regularly.
    >
    > *****for me, goal setting and rewards were very important. I set goals
    for
    > behaviors, so many days of keeping my journal, drinking the water, etc, since losing was not going
    > to happen every week. The rewards were
    specific,
    > planned for every 5 pounds lost, written out, and purchased without fail.
    > >
    > > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want
    > > to fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to
    do
    > > thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope" if you don't reach your
    > goal?
    > >
    > ***********This time around when I did not meet a goal, I looked at the
    sign
    > on my refrigerator that said "quit tomorrow" and I jumped right back on program. I told myself
    > that humans are Human, and that I never met a
    person
    > at goal who said they never went off program. They just did not allow it
    to
    > stop them. I am the worlds worst perfectionist, but I can tell you from here at Goal, the major
    > thing I did differently this time was allow myself to be human, and not get down.
    >
    > > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > > KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    > break
    > > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > > it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    > and
    > > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    > at
    > > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    > but
    > > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    > successful.
    > > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    > >
    > **********I averaged a little over a pound a week. Others are faster. I got here, and have
    > maintained now for 6 months. I think the way I learned to deal with actual life happening over the
    > 18 months it took me to lose
    the
    > last 80 pounds of the 200 something I lost, were invaluable. Looking back it seems like no time at
    > all. I Had specific behaviors though. I did not "hope" for a loss. I planned for one. On paper.
    > When I didn't get it, I was able to look back at written weeks where I Had gotten it, to inspire
    me.
    >
    >
     
  16. My father told me once that G*D didn't punish people who always did their
    best. It doesn't matter what others do just you. The one day at a time is
    sometimes, one minute at a time or one bite at a time, Lee
    Prairie Roots <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    > >Several questions actually....
    > >
    > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a
    > > loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of
    > > you do regularly.
    >
    > I'm always grateful for any loss, even a maintain. I set undated mini weight goals for myself
    > because it keeps me focused. Kinda like following a trail of bread crumbs in the forest when the
    > end of the trail is too far ahead. I just have to get from one mini-goal to the next. I've set mini-
    > goals that are meaningful to me, usually 2-3 lbs apart, just far enough that I have to work for
    > them, not so far that I can't reach them in a couple of weeks. Since fluctuations and special
    > occasions are part of life I don't sweat over reaching them by a particular date.
    >
    > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you
    > > "cope" if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    > One thing I do is tell myself that a bad day is just that: a bad day. It's not a reflection of my
    > worth as a human being.
    >
    > Also, since I don't attach dates to my mini-goals, other than the goal set for the group
    > challenges, I don't usually have to do much "coping" with unmet goals. But that isn't to say I've
    > never been disappointed. The support and encouragement of this group has certainly helped me to be
    > more forgiving and patient with myself. More and more I'm able to accept that as long as I don't
    > quit, I'm not failing. That every maintain or gain is as much a part of the journey as every loss.
    > Heck, I call myself a lifetimer already, because I intend to follow this way of eating for life.
    > In that sense, I'm already at goal!
    >
    > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when
    > >it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran failure
    and
    > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    > I can only say what has helped me. From the beginning, I've had a hard time thinking of myself as
    > thin or normal weight. I don't even know what normal weight is. That's one reason the mini-goals
    > help. I can imagine weighing 2, 3, 5 lbs less than now. But sometimes even 10 lbs lighter is hard
    > to imagine. When I think now at having lost 70+ lbs to date, I can hardly believe it. So for me,
    > visualizing success has had little to do with my actual success. For a long time, I thought that
    > in order to be thin, I first had to have worked through all the emotional and psychological issues
    > that kept me overeating and fat. I suppose I have done that, to a certain extent. But at some
    > point, I came to realize that I can be thin and crazy. Several years ago, I was in Overeaters
    > Anonymous. Some of the OA sayings help me now: "Do the work and the results will follow." "It
    > works if you work it." "Progress not perfection."
    >
    > What I appreciate about WW is that there are as many ways to work the program as there are people
    > in the program. If visualizing thinness is what works for you, then do that. But don't sweat it if
    > it doesn't. Just try something else.
    >
    > This is what I believe: The only failure is to quit. As long as you're trying, you're making
    > progress. You only have to do this one day at a time.
    >
    > You're asking yourself the hard questions and working through the answers. In my mind, that's the
    > best indicator of success. You can do this!
    >
    > Linda P
    > 232/159.6/WW goal 145 joined WW Online 22-Feb-2003
     
  17. very encouraging, Lee
    Joyce <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]>
    wrote:
    >
    > >Several questions actually....
    > >
    > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have just been "hoping for a
    > > loss" each week, but from some of your posts I gather that goal-setting is something some of
    > > you do regularly.
    >
    > Importance depends on the individual. For me it was important, otherwise
    all I
    > had to look ahead to was that final number ... which was close to 100
    pounds away
    > and very daunting. But setting up mini-goals along the way, I didn't look
    at the
    > final goal. I only looked ahead to the next few pounds. THIS I knew I
    could
    > accomplish. Keep things in a positive mode.
    >
    > >
    > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself mentally anyway and don't want to
    > > fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to do thanks to a rough childhood. How do you
    > > "cope" if you don't reach your
    goal?
    >
    > I didn't set up time frames for my goals, only milestone markers. This
    way there
    > never was a goal that wasn't met. Some may have taken longer, but
    eventually they
    > were reached. So there really wasn't any negative issues for me to cope
    with
    > along the way either.
    >
    > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term, as
    I
    > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    break
    > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it?
    >
    > Again, move away from the time frames, only use markers. I had mine set
    up at a
    > few pound intervals ... some 10%'s, some new decades, whatever numbers
    strike your
    > fancy or seem important to you. For example, I started out at 228 so of
    course ww
    > suggested my first mini-goal be 10%. Well, that was 28 pounds - pretty
    daunting
    > for me. So for me, my first goal was to reach the two-teens ... then
    two-0's ...
    > then onederland ... then 10%. After that I may have moved into more 5
    pound
    > mini-goals as the weightlosses were a bit slower than in the beginning.
    Mixing in
    > a second 10%, third 10% and those mini-goals were sometimes even just a
    pound
    > apart. There was always something to look forward to, always something to
    keep me
    > motivated, and they were small enough to always seem possible. I never
    said *in 2

    way for
    > me to fail then, was to quit.
    >
    >
    > >I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a
    veteran failure and
    > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing myself
    at
    > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    but
    > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    successful.
    > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    >
    > You don't sound dumb at all! Asking for help is why we all are here. If
    we
    > didn't need help, we probably wouldn't have ended up having to lose the
    weight. I
    > don't know how to get past hoping for those losses as I think we all still
    do it
    > from time to time. Right now my scale is showing me up a few pounds, yes,
    I am
    > hoping for losses. It's normal. But I do think the mini-goal/milestone
    approach
    > may be perfect for you, might get your mind off the *big picture* which
    seems so
    > terribly daunting.
    >
    > Joyce
    >
    >
     
  18. wonderful NSV, Lee
    WannaBLean <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > WOW! You guys are GREAT! And I am happy to report that I DID NOT have pizza at parent-teacher
    > conference tonight. Not because I couldn't have it points-wise, but just because turning it down
    > made me feel strong. :) I
    mean
    > it you guys. I AM GOING TO DO IT THIS TIME!! I know y'all believe I will, too. :) "Lesanne"
    > <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > > Very good post, my answers are in the middle of it..... "WannaBLean" <[email protected]> wrote
    > > in message news:[email protected]...
    > > > Several questions actually....
    > > >
    > > > 1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have
    > just
    > > > been "hoping for a loss" each week, but from some of your posts I
    gather
    > > > that goal-setting is something some of you do regularly.
    > >
    > > *****for me, goal setting and rewards were very important. I set goals
    > for
    > > behaviors, so many days of keeping my journal, drinking the water, etc, since losing was not
    > > going to happen every week. The rewards were
    > specific,
    > > planned for every 5 pounds lost, written out, and purchased without
    fail.
    > > >
    > > > 2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself
    mentally
    > > > anyway and don't want to fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to
    > do
    > > > thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope" if you don't reach your
    > > goal?
    > > >
    > > ***********This time around when I did not meet a goal, I looked at the
    > sign
    > > on my refrigerator that said "quit tomorrow" and I jumped right back on program. I told myself
    > > that humans are Human, and that I never met a
    > person
    > > at goal who said they never went off program. They just did not allow
    it
    > to
    > > stop them. I am the worlds worst perfectionist, but I can tell you from here at Goal, the major
    > > thing I did differently this time was allow
    myself
    > > to be human, and not get down.
    > >
    > > > 3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term,
    as
    > I
    > > > KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    > > break
    > > > down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it? I'm sorry
    to
    > > > sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a veteran
    failure
    > > and
    > > > I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing
    myself
    > > at
    > > > goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the
    treadmill,
    > > but
    > > > I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    > > successful.
    > > > I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    > > >
    > > **********I averaged a little over a pound a week. Others are faster.
    I
    > > got here, and have maintained now for 6 months. I think the way I
    learned
    > > to deal with actual life happening over the 18 months it took me to lose
    > the
    > > last 80 pounds of the 200 something I lost, were invaluable. Looking
    back
    > > it seems like no time at all. I Had specific behaviors though. I did
    not
    > > "hope" for a loss. I planned for one. On paper. When I didn't get it,
    I
    > > was able to look back at written weeks where I Had gotten it, to inspire
    > me.
    > >
    > > >
    > >
    >
     
  19. I am sorry, my meetings are much like this group so I get double whammy
    support, Lee
    LuvDaVols <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > I appreciate these wonderful answers and this wonderful supportive group.
    I
    > never felt THIS accepted at WW meetings! "Joyce" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    > news:[email protected]...
    > > On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 23:02:14 -0600, "WannaBLean" <[email protected]>
    > wrote:
    > >
    > > >Several questions actually....
    > > >
    > > >1. How important is setting specific goals for weekly losses? I have
    just
    > > >been "hoping for a loss" each week, but from some of your posts I
    gather
    > > >that goal-setting is something some of you do regularly.
    > >
    > > Importance depends on the individual. For me it was important,
    otherwise
    > all I
    > > had to look ahead to was that final number ... which was close to 100
    > pounds away
    > > and very daunting. But setting up mini-goals along the way, I didn't
    look
    > at the
    > > final goal. I only looked ahead to the next few pounds. THIS I knew I
    > could
    > > accomplish. Keep things in a positive mode.
    > >
    > > >
    > > >2. What do you do if a goal isn't met? I'm kinda hard on myself
    mentally
    > > >anyway and don't want to fall into a negativity trap, as I am prone to
    do
    > > >thanks to a rough childhood. How do you "cope" if you don't reach your
    > goal?
    > >
    > > I didn't set up time frames for my goals, only milestone markers. This
    > way there
    > > never was a goal that wasn't met. Some may have taken longer, but
    > eventually they
    > > were reached. So there really wasn't any negative issues for me to cope
    > with
    > > along the way either.
    > >
    > > >3. How long should it take to "reach a goal"? I don't mean long-term,
    as
    > I
    > > >KNOW I will not lose 100 pounds in two months, but say if I wanted to
    > break
    > > >down that 100 pounds into mini-goals, how do I go about it?
    > >
    > > Again, move away from the time frames, only use markers. I had mine set
    > up at a
    > > few pound intervals ... some 10%'s, some new decades, whatever numbers
    > strike your
    > > fancy or seem important to you. For example, I started out at 228 so of
    > course ww
    > > suggested my first mini-goal be 10%. Well, that was 28 pounds - pretty
    > daunting
    > > for me. So for me, my first goal was to reach the two-teens ... then
    > two-0's ...
    > > then onederland ... then 10%. After that I may have moved into more 5
    > pound
    > > mini-goals as the weightlosses were a bit slower than in the beginning.
    > Mixing in
    > > a second 10%, third 10% and those mini-goals were sometimes even just a
    > pound
    > > apart. There was always something to look forward to, always something
    to
    > keep me
    > > motivated, and they were small enough to always seem possible. I never
    > said *in 2

    only
    > way for
    > > me to fail then, was to quit.
    > >
    > >
    > > >I'm sorry to sound so dumb, but when it comes to weight loss, I am a
    > veteran failure and
    > > >I am admitting that I need help. I have already begun visualizing
    myself
    > at
    > > >goal before going to sleep at night and while walking on the treadmill,
    > but
    > > >I can't just keep "hoping for a loss" each week and expect to be
    > successful.
    > > >I know myself too well. Any advice? Anyone? Thanks in advance.
    > >
    > > You don't sound dumb at all! Asking for help is why we all are here.
    If
    > we
    > > didn't need help, we probably wouldn't have ended up having to lose the
    > weight. I
    > > don't know how to get past hoping for those losses as I think we all
    still
    > do it
    > > from time to time. Right now my scale is showing me up a few pounds,
    yes,
    > I am
    > > hoping for losses. It's normal. But I do think the mini-goal/milestone
    > approach
    > > may be perfect for you, might get your mind off the *big picture* which
    > seems so
    > > terribly daunting.
    > >
    > > Joyce
    > >
    > >
    > > >
    >
     
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