D
Dylan Cole
Guest
Um... I've been wondering that for months and months now and have been
afraid to ask. I guess she makes pig slop (???). I'm tired of WCPO
(channel 9 in Cincinnati) shilling her and the HGTV (Home & Garden
Television)/Food Network/SAH (Shop At Home)/GAC (Great American
Country/DIY (Do It Yourself)/Fine Living stuff.
DonEagles wrote:
> What exactly does SLop stand for? Sandra Lee _ _....???
>
>
>
> "Ubiquitous" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>
>>SLop is in her dinning room and tells us she brought in trelaces from her
>>yard to decorate her dining room and bought some more quilts for her
>>table from a mail-order catalog. She announces the menu, ending with a
>>cinnamon roll cocktail that "tastes just like an authentic cinnamon roll
>>right from your local mall" (as opposed to those counterfeit ones?)
>>
>>SLop walks into the kitchen holding a loaf of french bread in one hand
>>and a can with a cute Rachel Ray-esque red with a horizontal white stripe
>>label. I guess the endorsement check from Campbell's bounced.
>>
>>She pours a can of cheddar cheese soup into a pot and then adds a can of
>>tomato soup. So far, all the soup cans are disguised. She then adds three
>>small cans of a spicy tomato juice, but bloody mary mix will work too.
>>These cans are disguised too. She then adds two teaspoons of Tabasco, but
>>not a drop more because it's already hot. As it cooks and "melds
>>together" she cuts a french bread loaf into half inch slices. The great
>>thing about using a french bread load is that it make nice individual
>>dipping sandwiches. She makes three sandwiches and tells us she can't
>>wait to show us what goes in them. She puts a can of southwest pepper
>>jack soup into a bowl and then adds an entire package of Mexican style
>>cheese because it has a lot of favour and they did all the work for you.
>>She adds that there's already spices in it which makes it delicious. She
>>explains that she uses soup because it holds the cheese together so she
>>can spread it on the bread and it helps keeps cheese from oozing out. I
>>don't know about you, but I find using slices of cheese solves that
>>little problem. She picks up one of the bread slices and tells us to
>>butter the bread. Oddly enough, she scooped this big glob of butter but
>>suddenly the bread is thinly covered. While still holding the piece of
>>bread, she "fills it" with some of the cheese mixture. She tops it with
>>another piece of bread, butters it, then puts it in a pan. She tells us
>>you don't need to grease into the pan. She makes another sandwich but
>>puts the filling on first, butters one side, puts it in the pan and then
>>globbers butter onto the top side while explaining that the butter adds
>>favour and makes it brown and crisp. As she makes a third sandwich, she
>>tells us this is a variation of ordinary grilled cheese sandwiches that
>>she enjoys. This time she puts on the filling and butters both sides
>>before putting it in the pan. It appears the stove is not on because all
>>three sandwiches are silently sitting there. She rinses her hands as the
>>camera lingers on the languishing sandwiches. We see a hand stirring the
>>soup as she announces the sandwiches are ready to be flipped and we
>>suddenly jump to a shot of her flipping the brown and sizzling
>>sandwiches. She tells us they will be done in literally one second as she
>>puts the soup into bowls, but they're margarita glasses, not bowls.
>>Before we go to commercial break, she tells us she's going to make
>>chicken and dumplings with something right out of your own refrigerator
>>(better than the trash can I sppse), then grabs the last sandwich from
>>the frying pan and runs off to wolf it down.
>>
>>We return from commercial break to see SLop emptying the last of six cans
>>of chicken stock into a big pitcher, which she then dumps into a big pot.
>>Why the hell didn't she just dump the cans directly into the pot? At the
>>same time, she sautes some onions with a little oil until they are soft.
>>She then opens some packages of carrot and celery sticks, telling us that
>>this saves you about 2/3 of the work yet allows you to take credit for
>>making something that tastes homemade. SLop then proceeds to clumsily
>>dice them (huh?).
>>
>>She sets them aside and opens a tube of buttermilk biscuits, then
>>quarters them. SLop then tells us she got the idea for this from a fancy
>>dancy restaurant in Little Rock, AR where she had the best chicken and
>>dumplings she ever had, which inspired her for this recipe. Something
>>does NOT add up here...
>>
>>She sets that aside, then takes a "pre-roasted" chicken and peels off the
>>skin. Hmmm, looks like she tore off some big chucks of meat with the
>>skin. Suddenly, we cut to her giddily mumbling something and then washing
>>her greasy hands because she was touching fresh chicken. Wow! She even
>>used soap! Too bad she totally missed the point of why one washes his
>>hands...
>>
>>She stirs the onion with a whoot and adds it to stockpot, then chops up
>>the chicken, adding "if you find any gristle or other parts of the
>>chicken you don't want, make sure you take that out". She mushes the
>>chicken with her knife, then washes her hands AGAIN before adding the
>>veggies and bright red poultry seasoning. She stirs in the chicken and
>>says she's going to let it heat for a couple minutes before adding the
>>secret ingredient (in another disguised can) and the dumplings.
>>
>>While it cooks, she starts on the pear tarts by fetching some prepackaged
>>pastry dough from the fridge and slicing some canned pears can (add one
>>to the disguised can count) strained from the juice and putting them into
>>a dish.
>>
>>She takes off the pan lid with a whoot and adds a can of chicken gravy to
>>make it thick, rich, delicious, and creamy. Wow, some secret! She
>>announces it's time to add the dumplings to the boiling mixture, but it's
>>just barely has steam coming off the surface. SL tells us the dumplings
>>cook quickly, so one should add them just before you serve them.
>>Shouldn't they be put in earlier, so they cook thoroughly?
>>
>>She gets the puff pastry dough back from the fridge because it has to be
>>nice and solid. Is that a bottle of booze on the table next to the dough?
>>She asks "what else do I need as I take this apart?" Oh, I know! Booze!
>>No, flour. "Just take your dough right out of the package and of course
>>it should be pre-thawed out..." she flours her working surface and
>>unrolls the folded-up dough. She sets the extra aside and flours the top
>>before smoothing it out with a rolling pin. She makes an egg wash and
>>applies it with a pastry brush.
>>
>>She returns to the chicken and dumplings and puts it into a bowl to cool
>>off, then puts the pot onto the counter. She puts the puff pastry dough
>>onto a baking sheet and sets it atop the stove where she was just
>>cooking. She tells us we don't need to grease the baking sheet because of
>>all the butter in the dough. She then folds up the edges of the dough to
>>form a rim and I suddenly realize AB did this on an ep of Good Eats once.
>>She then perforates the center so it doesn't puff up when it bakes and
>>refers to this as "docking', then covers the bottom of the pastry with
>>the pear slices. With a trembling hand, she drizzles some pear liquor and
>>then sprinkles sugar so it crystallizes on top (isn't sugar already a
>>crystal?). She tops it with butter and pops it into the oven. She then
>>produces a finished **** and adds a little surprise: peach preserves and
>>peach nectar mixed up and microwaved for 15 seconds. Using a pastry brush
>>(a new one, she adds), she brushes it over the pears and dusts it with
>>powdered sugar. Before we cut out to commercial, SL breathlessly
>>announces that she cannot wait to show us her latest tablescape and
>>gushes over her latest cocktail concoction before snatching up the ****
>>and exiting stage left.
>>
>>When we return from commercial, we can tell by the graphic on the screen
>>that it's now "Sandra's Cocktail Time!". She announces her latest
>>cocktail concoction, the "cinnamon roll cocktail", which tastes just like
>>the
>>ones from the mall and airports that you can smell from a mile away.
>>Excuse, me, but drinking something that tastes like something from
>>Cinnabon is just all kinds of wrong, and for that matter, why didn't she
>>name them specifically like she did in her "mall foods" episode? She
>>starts off by filling a plastic bag with a labelless tub of Cool Whip T
>>when a loud whistling noise suddenly starts to drown out her talking. At
>>first I thought her tits were leaking, but it turns out it was only
>>coming from a nearby kettle of boiling water. She pours the water into a
>>measuring cup of Biblical proportions (but says a bowl is OK) and adds
>>some instant cinnamon Capuchin. To this she adds about 2 shots o caramel
>>liquor, 2 shots of van rum, 2 cups of cinnamon schnapps, and 2 shots dark
>>rum. I said "about" because she really just eyeballs it. She stirs it and
>>the camera cuts away just a it sloshes over the edge, then pours it into
>>a mug and squeezes out some cool whip on top, followed by some fresh
>>cinnamon from a jar and garnishes it with a cinnamon stick. SLop takes
>>the drink and retreats to her tablescape.
>>
>>SL enters from stage left and babbles something about remembering that
>>with comfort food you should bring in things from outside like the
>>trelace to make the house look like spring outdoors all year. Yeah, I
>>have no clue what she was babbling about and I spent five minutes
>>rewinding and playing this. With this in mind, she put a wheel barrel
>>from her garden filled with silk flowers in the center of her table.
>>While she was at it, she added the bird bath for good measure. I sure
>>hope she cleaned it first... She then tells us that favours are something
>>she loves to give (ahem), so she gives everyone eclectic sets of tea
>>mugs. Hmm, they look like tea cups to me, but let's not nit-pick. Taking
>>her crazy imaginary Aunt Peggy's idea, she uses a quilt for a tablecloth
>>and adds that everyone is going to think "great" when they see them (heh
>>heh heh) and think they're "special" (like the Olympics, I reckon). SLop
>>plugs the Food Network site and gives her closing lines.
>>
>>--
>>WARNING!!!
>>Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
>>standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We
>>assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the
>>"food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure
>>where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss
>
> Lee.
>
>>
>>
>>
>
>
afraid to ask. I guess she makes pig slop (???). I'm tired of WCPO
(channel 9 in Cincinnati) shilling her and the HGTV (Home & Garden
Television)/Food Network/SAH (Shop At Home)/GAC (Great American
Country/DIY (Do It Yourself)/Fine Living stuff.
DonEagles wrote:
> What exactly does SLop stand for? Sandra Lee _ _....???
>
>
>
> "Ubiquitous" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>
>>SLop is in her dinning room and tells us she brought in trelaces from her
>>yard to decorate her dining room and bought some more quilts for her
>>table from a mail-order catalog. She announces the menu, ending with a
>>cinnamon roll cocktail that "tastes just like an authentic cinnamon roll
>>right from your local mall" (as opposed to those counterfeit ones?)
>>
>>SLop walks into the kitchen holding a loaf of french bread in one hand
>>and a can with a cute Rachel Ray-esque red with a horizontal white stripe
>>label. I guess the endorsement check from Campbell's bounced.
>>
>>She pours a can of cheddar cheese soup into a pot and then adds a can of
>>tomato soup. So far, all the soup cans are disguised. She then adds three
>>small cans of a spicy tomato juice, but bloody mary mix will work too.
>>These cans are disguised too. She then adds two teaspoons of Tabasco, but
>>not a drop more because it's already hot. As it cooks and "melds
>>together" she cuts a french bread loaf into half inch slices. The great
>>thing about using a french bread load is that it make nice individual
>>dipping sandwiches. She makes three sandwiches and tells us she can't
>>wait to show us what goes in them. She puts a can of southwest pepper
>>jack soup into a bowl and then adds an entire package of Mexican style
>>cheese because it has a lot of favour and they did all the work for you.
>>She adds that there's already spices in it which makes it delicious. She
>>explains that she uses soup because it holds the cheese together so she
>>can spread it on the bread and it helps keeps cheese from oozing out. I
>>don't know about you, but I find using slices of cheese solves that
>>little problem. She picks up one of the bread slices and tells us to
>>butter the bread. Oddly enough, she scooped this big glob of butter but
>>suddenly the bread is thinly covered. While still holding the piece of
>>bread, she "fills it" with some of the cheese mixture. She tops it with
>>another piece of bread, butters it, then puts it in a pan. She tells us
>>you don't need to grease into the pan. She makes another sandwich but
>>puts the filling on first, butters one side, puts it in the pan and then
>>globbers butter onto the top side while explaining that the butter adds
>>favour and makes it brown and crisp. As she makes a third sandwich, she
>>tells us this is a variation of ordinary grilled cheese sandwiches that
>>she enjoys. This time she puts on the filling and butters both sides
>>before putting it in the pan. It appears the stove is not on because all
>>three sandwiches are silently sitting there. She rinses her hands as the
>>camera lingers on the languishing sandwiches. We see a hand stirring the
>>soup as she announces the sandwiches are ready to be flipped and we
>>suddenly jump to a shot of her flipping the brown and sizzling
>>sandwiches. She tells us they will be done in literally one second as she
>>puts the soup into bowls, but they're margarita glasses, not bowls.
>>Before we go to commercial break, she tells us she's going to make
>>chicken and dumplings with something right out of your own refrigerator
>>(better than the trash can I sppse), then grabs the last sandwich from
>>the frying pan and runs off to wolf it down.
>>
>>We return from commercial break to see SLop emptying the last of six cans
>>of chicken stock into a big pitcher, which she then dumps into a big pot.
>>Why the hell didn't she just dump the cans directly into the pot? At the
>>same time, she sautes some onions with a little oil until they are soft.
>>She then opens some packages of carrot and celery sticks, telling us that
>>this saves you about 2/3 of the work yet allows you to take credit for
>>making something that tastes homemade. SLop then proceeds to clumsily
>>dice them (huh?).
>>
>>She sets them aside and opens a tube of buttermilk biscuits, then
>>quarters them. SLop then tells us she got the idea for this from a fancy
>>dancy restaurant in Little Rock, AR where she had the best chicken and
>>dumplings she ever had, which inspired her for this recipe. Something
>>does NOT add up here...
>>
>>She sets that aside, then takes a "pre-roasted" chicken and peels off the
>>skin. Hmmm, looks like she tore off some big chucks of meat with the
>>skin. Suddenly, we cut to her giddily mumbling something and then washing
>>her greasy hands because she was touching fresh chicken. Wow! She even
>>used soap! Too bad she totally missed the point of why one washes his
>>hands...
>>
>>She stirs the onion with a whoot and adds it to stockpot, then chops up
>>the chicken, adding "if you find any gristle or other parts of the
>>chicken you don't want, make sure you take that out". She mushes the
>>chicken with her knife, then washes her hands AGAIN before adding the
>>veggies and bright red poultry seasoning. She stirs in the chicken and
>>says she's going to let it heat for a couple minutes before adding the
>>secret ingredient (in another disguised can) and the dumplings.
>>
>>While it cooks, she starts on the pear tarts by fetching some prepackaged
>>pastry dough from the fridge and slicing some canned pears can (add one
>>to the disguised can count) strained from the juice and putting them into
>>a dish.
>>
>>She takes off the pan lid with a whoot and adds a can of chicken gravy to
>>make it thick, rich, delicious, and creamy. Wow, some secret! She
>>announces it's time to add the dumplings to the boiling mixture, but it's
>>just barely has steam coming off the surface. SL tells us the dumplings
>>cook quickly, so one should add them just before you serve them.
>>Shouldn't they be put in earlier, so they cook thoroughly?
>>
>>She gets the puff pastry dough back from the fridge because it has to be
>>nice and solid. Is that a bottle of booze on the table next to the dough?
>>She asks "what else do I need as I take this apart?" Oh, I know! Booze!
>>No, flour. "Just take your dough right out of the package and of course
>>it should be pre-thawed out..." she flours her working surface and
>>unrolls the folded-up dough. She sets the extra aside and flours the top
>>before smoothing it out with a rolling pin. She makes an egg wash and
>>applies it with a pastry brush.
>>
>>She returns to the chicken and dumplings and puts it into a bowl to cool
>>off, then puts the pot onto the counter. She puts the puff pastry dough
>>onto a baking sheet and sets it atop the stove where she was just
>>cooking. She tells us we don't need to grease the baking sheet because of
>>all the butter in the dough. She then folds up the edges of the dough to
>>form a rim and I suddenly realize AB did this on an ep of Good Eats once.
>>She then perforates the center so it doesn't puff up when it bakes and
>>refers to this as "docking', then covers the bottom of the pastry with
>>the pear slices. With a trembling hand, she drizzles some pear liquor and
>>then sprinkles sugar so it crystallizes on top (isn't sugar already a
>>crystal?). She tops it with butter and pops it into the oven. She then
>>produces a finished **** and adds a little surprise: peach preserves and
>>peach nectar mixed up and microwaved for 15 seconds. Using a pastry brush
>>(a new one, she adds), she brushes it over the pears and dusts it with
>>powdered sugar. Before we cut out to commercial, SL breathlessly
>>announces that she cannot wait to show us her latest tablescape and
>>gushes over her latest cocktail concoction before snatching up the ****
>>and exiting stage left.
>>
>>When we return from commercial, we can tell by the graphic on the screen
>>that it's now "Sandra's Cocktail Time!". She announces her latest
>>cocktail concoction, the "cinnamon roll cocktail", which tastes just like
>>the
>>ones from the mall and airports that you can smell from a mile away.
>>Excuse, me, but drinking something that tastes like something from
>>Cinnabon is just all kinds of wrong, and for that matter, why didn't she
>>name them specifically like she did in her "mall foods" episode? She
>>starts off by filling a plastic bag with a labelless tub of Cool Whip T
>>when a loud whistling noise suddenly starts to drown out her talking. At
>>first I thought her tits were leaking, but it turns out it was only
>>coming from a nearby kettle of boiling water. She pours the water into a
>>measuring cup of Biblical proportions (but says a bowl is OK) and adds
>>some instant cinnamon Capuchin. To this she adds about 2 shots o caramel
>>liquor, 2 shots of van rum, 2 cups of cinnamon schnapps, and 2 shots dark
>>rum. I said "about" because she really just eyeballs it. She stirs it and
>>the camera cuts away just a it sloshes over the edge, then pours it into
>>a mug and squeezes out some cool whip on top, followed by some fresh
>>cinnamon from a jar and garnishes it with a cinnamon stick. SLop takes
>>the drink and retreats to her tablescape.
>>
>>SL enters from stage left and babbles something about remembering that
>>with comfort food you should bring in things from outside like the
>>trelace to make the house look like spring outdoors all year. Yeah, I
>>have no clue what she was babbling about and I spent five minutes
>>rewinding and playing this. With this in mind, she put a wheel barrel
>>from her garden filled with silk flowers in the center of her table.
>>While she was at it, she added the bird bath for good measure. I sure
>>hope she cleaned it first... She then tells us that favours are something
>>she loves to give (ahem), so she gives everyone eclectic sets of tea
>>mugs. Hmm, they look like tea cups to me, but let's not nit-pick. Taking
>>her crazy imaginary Aunt Peggy's idea, she uses a quilt for a tablecloth
>>and adds that everyone is going to think "great" when they see them (heh
>>heh heh) and think they're "special" (like the Olympics, I reckon). SLop
>>plugs the Food Network site and gives her closing lines.
>>
>>--
>>WARNING!!!
>>Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
>>standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We
>>assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the
>>"food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure
>>where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss
>
> Lee.
>
>>
>>
>>
>
>