road kill



Mark Thompson <[email protected]> wrote in
news:[email protected]:

> People say that as if it makes 'em bad. Rats are lovely little things.
> Kind of. They're like pigeons but they don't **** on your head.

We've got some living in our roof space, as do most of our neighbours
apparently (the hazards of living near a creek in winter). At first we
thought it might be a possum as there was so much noise. The idea of a
possum kind of appealed to me, then I saw a possum in the wild and it
looked just like a massive rat with friendly eyes. I'm sure if I'd have
poked my head up into the roof space and seen one I'd have freaked at the
size of Australian rats and fallen off the ladder :-O

Graeme
 
Graeme wrote:
>
> We've got some living in our roof space, as do most of our neighbours
> apparently (the hazards of living near a creek in winter). At first we
> thought it might be a possum as there was so much noise. The idea of a
> possum kind of appealed to me, then I saw a possum in the wild and it
> looked just like a massive rat with friendly eyes. I'm sure if I'd have
> poked my head up into the roof space and seen one I'd have freaked at the
> size of Australian rats and fallen off the ladder :-O
>

Its said that in London you are never more than 3m away from a rat (the animal
not the human kind who are much more abundant than that even)

Tony
 
Pete White <[email protected]> wrote in news:40cb0278$0
[email protected]:

> Have your heared about Trowbridge's pigeon problem?
>
> Basically, the pigeons are are fast taking over the town, shitting in
> the streets, getting in the way etc.
>

Sounds like the gull problem in Berwick Upon Tweed (and probably many other
coastal towns). The cull proposal is raised every few years, and I think it
does go ahead (but has little effect). Round about these times the local
paper is full of soft hearted (& headed) wallies whining about the sanctity
of all life. These are probably the same numpties who drop their fish and
chips all over the place which is one of the major factors in the gull
population explosion. After you've been crapped on a few times by a large
herring gull, you'd probably be willing to ring their necks one by one :-/


Graeme
 
"Dave Larrington" <[email protected]> wrote in news:2itj86Fqo2dpU2@uni-
berlin.de:

> Squirrels are EVIL, kids. Just say no.

I'm down to 15 a day. They say you won't get hooked, but once you start the
craving builds rapidly. I still get twitchy and hop around the place if I
go cold turkey :-/

Graeme
 
Dave Kahn <[email protected]> wrote in
news:[email protected]:

> I should be alright, Kahn being an old Anglo Saxon name after all.

What? Old Genghis was Anglo-Saxon was he? That explains the stroppy
attitude of some English football supporters then :)

Graeme
 
Simon Brooke <[email protected]> wrote:


> Bring back the wolf, I says. And I'm not joking.

There was an article about that on the bbc news site :-

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/2065794.stm

I suspect that they would either be shot by farmers, run over or catch
nasty domestic dog diseases though.

--
Carol
"Nothing is so virtuous as a bicycle."
- Dorothy L. Sayers, _Five Red Herrings_
 
>> Bring back the wolf, I says. And I'm not joking.
>
> There was an article about that on the bbc news site :-
>
> http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/2065794.stm
>
> I suspect that they would either be shot by farmers, run over or catch
> nasty domestic dog diseases though.

It would give the local hunt a bit of a shock...
 
> After you've
> been crapped on a few times by a large herring gull, you'd probably be
> willing to ring their necks one by one :-/

Eh? How many necks do your gulls have? If you've got hydras flapping
about the place & crapping on your head its probably a good idea to leave
'em at it and be thankful that thats all they're doing.
 
On Sun, 13 Jun 2004 07:13:16 GMT, Graeme
<[email protected]> wrote in message
<[email protected]>:

>> I should be alright, Kahn being an old Anglo Saxon name after all.
>What? Old Genghis was Anglo-Saxon was he?

Mr Prosser was certainly a direct descendant.

Guy
--
May contain traces of irony. Contents liable to settle after posting.
http://www.chapmancentral.co.uk

88% of helmet statistics are made up, 65% of them at Washington University
 
in message <[email protected]>, Mark McN
('[email protected]') wrote:

> Reply to Dave Kahn
>> >With my mother having the maiden name of Fleming, I'd be stamping on
>> >my own head (I've tried it, I'm not that flexible). :)
>>
>> I should be alright, Kahn being an old Anglo Saxon name after all.
>
> Anglo-Saxons? Normans? Romans?
>
> Tchuh - late-comers, the lot of 'em... ;-)

Watch out though - the Romans were here before the Scots. For very
precise values of here, the Romans had come and gone a thousand years
before we became part of Scotland. But then they were only here for
about twenty years.

--
[email protected] (Simon Brooke) http://www.jasmine.org.uk/~simon/

Morning had broken, and we had run out of gas for the welding torch.
 
Mark South [email protected]lid opined the following...
> Rats are humans biggest enemy after ourselves and viruses. They are directly
> responsible for a large amount of 3rd world poverty, destroying over 60% of
> crops produced, and about doubling the cost of food production.

I think that Barclays Bank is probably responsible for a greater
proportion of 3rd world poverty. Perhaps if we agreed to "drop the
debt" and allow them to return to subsistance farming, they could
survive considerably better than they do now.

> They also destroy biodiversity by waging relentless war on birds, insects, and
> other mammals.

I think that for humans to criticise any animal for damaging
biodiversity is hypocrisy on a grand scale. Rabbits in Australia? The
Dodo? Smallpox? We don't hold a good track record on leaving no mark.

> > Kind of. They're like pigeons but they don't **** on your head.
>
> Yeah, but they pollute your food and your environment and in some cases they
> spread airborne viruses that are fatal to humans. Lovely chaps.

That description applies equally (If not more so) to humans. Lovely
chaps indeed.

Jon
 
Graeme [email protected] opined the following...
> Sounds like the gull problem in Berwick Upon Tweed (and probably many other
> coastal towns). The cull proposal is raised every few years, and I think it
> does go ahead (but has little effect). Round about these times the local
> paper is full of soft hearted (& headed) wallies whining about the sanctity
> of all life. These are probably the same numpties who drop their fish and
> chips all over the place which is one of the major factors in the gull
> population explosion. After you've been crapped on a few times by a large
> herring gull, you'd probably be willing to ring their necks one by one :-/

Only if they were stunned. That's one vicious looking beak.

Jon
 
David Martin [email protected] opined the following...
> Use the technique used for killing rats in the lab..
>
> grab the tail where it exits the body and swing rapidly , bringing the neck
> in contact with a hard edge (top tube of the bike would do.) This will break
> the neck and kill the creature instantly.

I believe that a gas chamber is the preferred method of killing large
rodents in a lab according to the Home Office. The technique that you
describe is likely to result in the loss of the tail and requires
considerable accuracy. Try attaching a conker to a length of string then
swinging it in a single heavy blow so that the area immediately behind
the conker impacts the top of the tube. Now imagine that the weight is
not so uniformly distributed and the conker is capable of movement. I
would strongly recommend that unless you have experience of this or are
prepared to use the heel of boot / large rock on head technique, that
you contact a park ranger. Otherwise you may well increase the suffering
and will probably suffer nightmares for a while afterwards.

Jon
 
On Sun, 13 Jun 2004 13:21:01 +0100, Jon Senior
<jon_AT_restlesslemon_DOTco_DOT_uk> wrote in message
<[email protected]>:

>Only if they were stunned. That's one vicious looking beak.

<Whoop!> <Whoop!> Parrot Sketch Alert!

Guy
--
May contain traces of irony. Contents liable to settle after posting.
http://www.chapmancentral.co.uk

88% of helmet statistics are made up, 65% of them at Washington University
 
Jon Senior <jon_AT_restlesslemon_DOTco_DOT_uk> wrote in
news:[email protected]:

> Only if they were stunned.

True, they're not as dosey as your common or garden pigeon which are
generally so stupid that they will feed from crumbs directly beneath your
feet. Anyone so minded could flatten one (not that I have).

Going back a little, grey squirrels are pretty dense too. In the Botanic
Gardens in Edinburgh you can crouch down and wiggle your fingers as if you
have food and they'll come running to feed out of your hand. Personally, I
stopped falling for that trick weeks ago!

Graeme
 
"Mark South" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
> "Daniel Barlow" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
> > "Mark South" <[email protected]> writes:
> >
> > > Just toe the party line and there won't be any trouble. Start your
> > > chant now:
>
> > > "Death to helmet wearers, death to pavement cyclists, death to
> > > red-light jumpers, death to squirrels, death to buzzards, death to
> > > shops that don't allow bikes, death to the BBC, death to motorists,
> > > death to children, death to safer cycling courses, death to everyone
> > > else that got left out accidentally."
> >
> > Just for reference, you missed bibshort wearers, users of sub-£200
> > bikes, disc brakes that don't require a second mortgage, and
> > pedestrians. Also anyone who posts to uk.transport or exceeds speed
> > limits (there may be overlap in those last two groups)
>
> Those were the "everyone else that got left out accidentally" :)
>
> There was a time, not so long ago, when the list looked as if it would also have
> to include people on non-recumbent bikes.

You forgot football fans ;-)
 
On Fri, 11 Jun 2004 11:50:05 +0100, Peter Clinch
<[email protected]> wrote:

>A pal of mine is a Parkie, and she regularly distresses the more
>sensitive kids on school visits by describing grey squirrels along the
>lines of "rat with good PR".

I had a very brief race today with a rat whose PR is done by Max
Clifford and Saatchi and Saatchi in combination - aka a rabbit.

James
 
"Jon Senior" <jon_AT_restlesslemon_DOTco_DOT_uk> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Mark South [email protected]lid opined the following...
> > Rats are humans biggest enemy after ourselves and viruses. They are
directly
> > responsible for a large amount of 3rd world poverty, destroying over 60% of
> > crops produced, and about doubling the cost of food production.
>
> I think that Barclays Bank is probably responsible for a greater
> proportion of 3rd world poverty. Perhaps if we agreed to "drop the
> debt" and allow them to return to subsistance farming, they could
> survive considerably better than they do now.

The rats would not care. They'd carry on destroying 60% of crops and damaging
the rest in storage.

> > They also destroy biodiversity by waging relentless war on birds, insects,
and
> > other mammals.
>
> I think that for humans to criticise any animal for damaging
> biodiversity is hypocrisy on a grand scale. Rabbits in Australia? The
> Dodo? Smallpox? We don't hold a good track record on leaving no mark.

No, we don't. And spreading rats is a lot worse than introducing Rabbits to Oz
was.

> > > Kind of. They're like pigeons but they don't **** on your head.
> >
> > Yeah, but they pollute your food and your environment and in some cases they
> > spread airborne viruses that are fatal to humans. Lovely chaps.
>
> That description applies equally (If not more so) to humans. Lovely
> chaps indeed.

I've already given you a list to chant of humans that need to be knocked off.
--
Mark South: World Citizen, Net Denizen
 
Mark South [email protected]lid opined the following...
> The rats would not care. They'd carry on destroying 60% of crops and damaging
> the rest in storage.

So you use the money to build better stores. That solves one problem.
Presumably we must have a similar problem in the developed world, yet we
don't starve!

> > I think that for humans to criticise any animal for damaging
> > biodiversity is hypocrisy on a grand scale. Rabbits in Australia? The
> > Dodo? Smallpox? We don't hold a good track record on leaving no mark.
>
> No, we don't. And spreading rats is a lot worse than introducing Rabbits to Oz
> was.

But on a par with our ability to commit genocide. Smallpox is
significant because if the small stocks currently held in research labs
are destroyed it'll be the first time that humanity has intentionally
destroyed a species, as apposed to not looking where we tread.

> > That description applies equally (If not more so) to humans. Lovely
> > chaps indeed.
>
> I've already given you a list to chant of humans that need to be knocked off.

In another thread? I think I know the one. I just think it's dangerous
to criticise animals for doing similar things to man without
simultaneously acknowledging our contributions.

Jon
 
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