RR posted on behalf of the most decidedly delicious Kath:

Discussion in 'Mountain Bikes' started by Shaun Rimmer, Jun 3, 2003.

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  1. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Ride Report Billington to Whalley (and back)

    It had been a long day in the office, and it was incredibly muggy.

    Got home earlier than usual, and decided to abandon four wheels in favour of two for my journey.
    Dressed for the part (well, I selotaped the bottom of my trousers round my ankles) and after
    wrestling my new to me bike from the shed, (recently lovingly reconditioned by the skilled but
    tender hands of the gorgeous Mr Shaun Rimmer - after it had almost been cast into the skip) I set
    off on my epic journey.

    To start I had to negotiate cobbles and potholes, weaving unskilfully over and around them, for what
    seemed like several miles, but on reflection was actually around four yards, I hit the road, and boy
    could that baby move! I must have topped almost 5mph before having to screech to a halt perhaps 20
    yards into my journey. No good! I had to get off and gently coax my lovely shiny bike under the
    gatepost. Now the part I had been more than a little anxious about, a long narrow path, about 200
    yards in length, with rusty spikes running along either side at about eye height, and huge nettles
    whipping at my ankles, I tried to remember Shaun's advice and focus ahead -oh no! A woman walking
    her dog approaching, I could feel panic rising into a scream! Do I stop and let her past? Would she
    stop? Would the dog become entangled in my wheels and die a long painful death as I dragged its
    little body along, unable to use my brakes after I froze in a blinding panic?????

    The woman stopped, picked up the dog, and I edged past apologetically - god, this sport is drawing
    me in now - I can feel the adrenalin kick in, and I am hungry for more! (Well, I am always hungry,
    but that's another story) I get to the end of the path with no more encounters, and easily negotiate
    a switch back onto the bridge (ok, it was a couple of slight bends in the path, but hey! That would
    sound really pathetic, so indulge me!). As I look down to the river, I can't help but notice a
    couple of ducks eying me up, now I don't know what damage a duck is capable of inflicting, but these
    guys didn't look friendly, and I thought it best not to hang around too long and risk angering them,
    so I pedalled for all I was worth towards the road.

    (At this point I would like to point out, I have not ridden a bike since I was about.15 years old,
    so bare with me!)

    Thankfully there was no traffic on the road, so I took the opportunity to try those gear thingies
    out. I tried to recall the instructions my beloved Shaun had tried to give me, and managed to make
    my legs go from spinning round in a blur, to feeling like I was riding through treacle, then my head
    feeling like it was spinning in a blur through treacle, I had to stop for a moment here.

    Now all I wanted to do was get to my destination, I hung a right onto yet another treacherous path,
    running along the graveyard - with my head low to avoid the metal beams covering the path. (I knew
    one false head movement, and I would end up as a resident in said graveyard)

    Another gatepost to negotiate, then I tore down hill over boulders, broken branches, empty coke
    cans, crisp packets, the wind in my face, my hair wildly whipping my eyes, squirrels running for
    cover, rooks falling out of the trees - with laughter. What a rush!

    I arrived at my destination completely exhausted, and very happy. It wasn't long before Shaun turned
    up to escort me back, so I knew I would be safe! Can you imagine how chuffed I was when he told me I
    had travelled almost a full mile there and back! I love that guy!

    Ps. can anyone tell me the best way for girls to get onto their bike? Is it correct etiquette to use
    the leg over the back method??

    Kath.
     
    Tags:


  2. Technician

    Technician Guest

    Shaun Rimmer <[email protected]> spoke thusly...
    > Ride Report Billington to Whalley (and back)
    >
    > It had been a long day in the office, and it was incredibly muggy.
    >
    > Got home earlier than usual, and decided to abandon four wheels in favour of two for my journey.
    > Dressed for the part (well, I selotaped the bottom of my trousers round my ankles) and after
    > wrestling my new to me bike from the shed, (recently lovingly reconditioned by the skilled but
    > tender hands of the gorgeous Mr Shaun Rimmer - after it had almost been cast into the skip) I set
    > off on my epic journey.
    >
    > To start I had to negotiate cobbles and potholes, weaving unskilfully over and around them, for
    > what seemed like several miles, but on reflection was actually around four yards, I hit the road,
    > and boy could that baby move! I must have topped almost 5mph before having to screech to a halt
    > perhaps 20 yards into my journey. No good! I had to get off and gently coax my lovely shiny bike
    > under the gatepost. Now the part I had been more than a little anxious about, a long narrow path,
    > about 200 yards in length, with rusty spikes running along either side at about eye height, and
    > huge nettles whipping at my ankles, I tried to remember Shaun's advice and focus ahead -oh no! A
    > woman walking her dog approaching, I could feel panic rising into a scream! Do I stop and let her
    > past? Would she stop? Would the dog become entangled in my wheels and die a long painful death as
    > I dragged its little body along, unable to use my brakes after I froze in a blinding panic?????
    >
    > The woman stopped, picked up the dog, and I edged past apologetically - god, this sport is drawing
    > me in now - I can feel the adrenalin kick in, and I am hungry for more! (Well, I am always hungry,
    > but that's another story) I get to the end of the path with no more encounters, and easily
    > negotiate a switch back onto the bridge (ok, it was a couple of slight bends in the path, but hey!
    > That would sound really pathetic, so indulge me!). As I look down to the river, I can't help but
    > notice a couple of ducks eying me up, now I don't know what damage a duck is capable of
    > inflicting, but these guys didn't look friendly, and I thought it best not to hang around too long
    > and risk angering them, so I pedalled for all I was worth towards the road.
    >
    > (At this point I would like to point out, I have not ridden a bike since I was about.15 years old,
    > so bare with me!)
    >
    > Thankfully there was no traffic on the road, so I took the opportunity to try those gear thingies
    > out. I tried to recall the instructions my beloved Shaun had tried to give me, and managed to make
    > my legs go from spinning round in a blur, to feeling like I was riding through treacle, then my
    > head feeling like it was spinning in a blur through treacle, I had to stop for a moment here.
    >
    > Now all I wanted to do was get to my destination, I hung a right onto yet another treacherous
    > path, running along the graveyard - with my head low to avoid the metal beams covering the path.
    > (I knew one false head movement, and I would end up as a resident in said graveyard)
    >
    > Another gatepost to negotiate, then I tore down hill over boulders, broken branches, empty coke
    > cans, crisp packets, the wind in my face, my hair wildly whipping my eyes, squirrels running for
    > cover, rooks falling out of the trees - with laughter. What a rush!
    >
    > I arrived at my destination completely exhausted, and very happy. It wasn't long before Shaun
    > turned up to escort me back, so I knew I would be safe! Can you imagine how chuffed I was when he
    > told me I had travelled almost a full mile there and back! I love that guy!
    >
    > Ps. can anyone tell me the best way for girls to get onto their bike? Is it correct etiquette to
    > use the leg over the back method??
    >
    > Kath.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >

    No idea how the girls do it, but i got my seat so high i can't go over the back. i usually put a leg
    over the top tube, and bring a pedal up and use the downward pedaling force to both get the bike
    moving and as a step up so i can get on the seat.
    --
    ~Travis

    travis57 at megalink dot net http://www.megalink.net/~farmers/
     
  3. Penny S.

    Penny S. Guest

    Shaun Rimmer thoughtfully penned:
    > Ps. can anyone tell me the best way for girls to get onto their bike? Is it correct etiquette to
    > use the leg over the back method??
    >
    > Kath.

    etiquette?

    Do what ever works, some things look more graceful than others. I personally clip in, standup and
    swing leg over seat. Other times it's whatever works.

    Penny
     
  4. Gyp

    Gyp Guest

    Shaun Rimmer wrote:
    > Ride Report
    <Still laughing from reading the post> <Chuckle>

    I would imagine "etiquette" would allow the "leg over" method if you hwere wearing shorts or cycling
    tights.. I would imagine that it isn't very lady like if wearing say a short skirt..<Blink>

    But then again it probably wouldn't be very good if a bloke flung his leg wearing a kilt so its
    probably about even..<Grin>..

    I did find..the following...

    > A Gentleman Escort
    >
    > The gentleman who accompanies ladies must be ever watchful to assist his companions in every way.
    > He should be capable of repairing any trifling injury to their machines which may occur on the
    > route, and be at all times provided with the proper tools for so doing. His place on the road is
    > at her left, that he may the more carefully guard her when meeting other cyclers, teams, etc., he
    > risking all danger from collisions. Mounting
    >
    > The gentleman accompanying the lady holds her wheel; she stands at the left, places her right foot
    > across the frame to the right pedal, which at the same time must be raised; pushing this pedal
    > causes the machine to start, and then with the left foot in place she starts ahead very slowly, in
    > order to give her companion time to mount his wheel and join her. When their destination is
    > reached the gentleman dismounts first and appears at his companion's side to assist her, but if
    > she be a true American woman she will help herself as mush as possible. Dismounting
    >
    > To dismount in the most graceful form one should gradually slacken speed, and when the left pedal
    > is on the rise throw the weight of the body upon it, cross the right foot over the frame of the
    > machine, and with an assisting hand step with a light spring to the ground.
    >
    > In meeting a party of cyclists who are acquantances and desire to stop for a little conversation
    > the gentlemen of the party dismount and sustain the ladies' wheels, the latter retaining their
    > positions in the saddle. How to Ride
    >
    > Above all else a lady should at all times maintain an upright position, and on this account should
    > be provided with a machine on which the handles turn upward rather than downward. The stooping
    > posture assumed by so many ladies on the wheel is not only coarse and decidedly ugly, but
    > exceedingly harmful, and will, in a very short time, tend to curvature of the spine, compression
    > of the lungs and their consequent diseases. Many riders claim that one rides much more easily,
    > when facing the wind, to bend forward, and thus break its force, but it were far better to ride a
    > shorter distance than to risk the ills of which we have spoken. Indeed, no woman should ever ride
    > after a feeling of weariness is experienced; the strain on the nerves and muscles is great and
    > should never be protracted after Nature gives the warning.
    >
    > The limit of speed is only a little less important than the limit of distance, which is designated
    > by the feeling of weariness. No man can ride at full speed for long distances and still retain
    > health and perfect vigor, and it is certain that no woman can maintain a high rate of speed for
    > one mile without laying the foundation for future suffering. There is no relaxation of the tension
    > of either muscles or nerves between the revolutions of the pedals. Many ladies complain, after
    > riding for a time, of a stinging sensation in the limbs and feet. The heart forcing the blood into
    > the arteries more rapidly than the veins can return it, and incipient paralysis or apoplexy may
    > result. Tandem Wheels
    >
    > are very popular, for they give a sense of nearness and protection. Still, the genious who invents
    > a double wheel providing for sitting side by side will have the blessings of many who like to see
    > the face of their fair companion. Properly used, the bicycle is considered a promoter of health,
    > developing, as it does, muscles which are otherwise seldom brought into play. It secures for women
    > that highly desirable condition of flesh, a firm, solid tissue, when muscles are flexed and a
    > velvety softness with muscular relaxation. Reminders for the use of Cyclers
    >
    > Don't try to raise your hat to a lady passing you until you are an expert on your wheel.
    >
    > Don't wear a red or gay-colored cap, under the impression that it is stylish.
    >
    > Don't laugh at the figure other riders present, for it is not given us to "Sae oorsel's as ithers
    > sae us."
    >
    > Don't neglect to turn to the right in passing another wheel or a vehicle.
    >
    > Don't ride fast down a steep hill with a curve at its foot.
    >
    > Don't ride fifteen miles at a scorching pace, and then drink copiously of water and lie down in
    > the grass.
    >
    > Don't carry your bicycle down stairs under your arm. Your shoulder is better adapted to it.
    >
    > Don't leave your wheel in a dark hall for other people to fall over.
    >

    Gyp
     
  5. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Penny S. <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > Shaun Rimmer thoughtfully penned:
    > > Ps. can anyone tell me the best way for girls to get onto their bike? Is it correct etiquette to
    > > use the leg over the back method??
    > >
    > > Kath.
    >
    > etiquette?
    >
    >
    > Do what ever works, some things look more graceful than others. I personally clip in, standup and
    > swing leg over seat. Other times it's whatever works.
    >
    > Penny

    What are you like! She was just having a giggle with that ',;~}~

    Shaun aRe
     
  6. Vaughn

    Vaughn Guest

  7. Gyp

    Gyp Guest

    Vaughn wrote:
    > "Gyp" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    >
    >
    >>I did find..the following...
    >>
    >
    > Wonderful stuff!! Where did you find it?
    >
    >

    it is quoted directly from Chapter XXVI.Cycling,gold,dancing and games" of "Twentieth Century
    Etiquette" by Annie Randall White, copyright © 1901 (Totally without permission, though I doubt
    Annie or the publisher really care anymore):

    I quite liked the fore word..

    In America

    the woman who minds her business may go wherever duty calls her.

    Of course, the first essential in cycling is a perfect wheel, safe, easy-running, with saddle built
    high and wide in the back, sloping away and downward in front, and fitted out with a clock, a bell,
    luggage carrier, and if the rider cares for records, a cyclometer.

    A lady can be as reserved upon a wheel as in her parlor. No lady will permit a stranger to accost
    her, even if she is riding alone, unless an accident or mishap to herself or wheel occurs, and then
    a true gentleman may offer his assistance, which may be accepted or not, without misconstruction or
    familiarity.

    The etiquette to be observed in cycling is to be civil to all; assist the timid, and do not mock or
    laugh at awkwardness. If you have an appointment to ride with a lady, be punctual, and accomodate
    your pace to hers. A good rule to be observed in this respect is to never go faster than you find it
    possible, and breathe through the nostrils. The moment you are inclined to open your mouth you may
    know that you are over-exerting yourself. Of course this advice would fall numb on the ears of a
    "scorcher."

    <Chuckle>

    Gyp
     
  8. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Gyp <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > Shaun Rimmer wrote:
    > > Ride Report
    > <Still laughing from reading the post> <Chuckle>

    She's a smart girl, and out matches my wit on many an occasion (all the occasions
    actually....heheheheheheheh!).

    > I would imagine "etiquette" would allow the "leg over" method if you hwere wearing shorts or
    > cycling tights.. I would imagine that it isn't very lady like if wearing say a short
    > skirt..<Blink>
    >
    > But then again it probably wouldn't be very good if a bloke flung his leg wearing a kilt so its
    > probably about even..<Grin>..
    >
    > I did find..the following...
    >
    > > A Gentleman Escort

    Heheheh - cheers Gyp, that was some good stuff, and duly forwarded to the lady herself ',;~}~

    Shaun aRe
     
  9. Penny S.

    Penny S. Guest

    They didn't like GRS stuff back then, either!!! Funnyhow much of this stuff still hold true.

    >> Reminders for the use of Cyclers
    >>
    >> Don't try to raise your hat to a lady passing you until you are an expert on your wheel.
    >>
    >> Don't wear a red or gay-colored cap, under the impression that it is stylish.
    >>
    >> Don't laugh at the figure other riders present, for it is not given us to "Sae oorsel's as ithers
    >> sae us."
    >>
    >> Don't neglect to turn to the right in passing another wheel or a vehicle.
    >>
    >> Don't ride fast down a steep hill with a curve at its foot.
    >>
    >> Don't ride fifteen miles at a scorching pace, and then drink copiously of water and lie down in
    >> the grass.
    >>
    >> Don't carry your bicycle down stairs under your arm. Your shoulder is better adapted to it.
    >>
    >> Don't leave your wheel in a dark hall for other people to fall over.
    >>
    >
    >
    > Gyp
     
  10. "Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > I arrived at my destination completely exhausted, and very happy. It wasn't long before Shaun
    > turned up to escort me back, so I knew I would be safe! Can you imagine how chuffed I was when he
    > told me I had travelled almost a full mile there and back! I love that guy! Kath.
    >

    Untie that girl immediately and let her out of the basement, hasn't she suffered enough?

    --
    Craig Brossman, Durango Colorado (remove .nospam. if replying)
     
  11. Dave W

    Dave W Guest

    On Tue, 3 Jun 2003 16:03:40 +0100, "Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote:

    >
    >Gyp <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    >> Shaun Rimmer wrote:
    >> > Ride Report
    >> <Still laughing from reading the post> <Chuckle>
    >
    >She's a smart girl, and out matches my wit on many an occasion (all the occasions
    >actually....heheheheheheheh!).

    Is that really saying alot?
     
  12. Gyp

    Gyp Guest

    Penny S. wrote:
    > They didn't like GRS stuff back then, either!!! Funnyhow much of this stuff still hold true.

    Indeed but some are not quite in vogue now <Chuckle>

    Still as a Victorian (US Publisher) guide its not half as bad as I expected it to be... Not quite
    sure what the point of the "incipient paralysis or apoplexy" is about but I guess anyone can get our
    if breath <Smile> even ladies..

    Gyp (Doffs hat)
     
  13. Supabonbon

    Supabonbon Guest

    Gyp <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
    > Shaun Rimmer wrote:
    > > Ride Report
    > <Still laughing from reading the post> <Chuckle>
    >
    > I would imagine "etiquette" would allow the "leg over" method if you hwere wearing shorts or
    > cycling tights.. I would imagine that it isn't very lady like if wearing say a short
    > skirt..<Blink>
    >
    > But then again it probably wouldn't be very good if a bloke flung his leg wearing a kilt so its
    > probably about even..<Grin>..
    >
    > I did find..the following...
    >
    > > A Gentleman Escort
    > >
    <snip>

    Stylin'! /s
     
  14. Kath says:

    >Dressed for the part (well, I selotaped the bottom of my trousers round my ankles)

    Man, you can tell the Northerners from a mile off. ;-P

    >the shed, (recently lovingly reconditioned by the skilled but tender hands of the gorgeous Mr Shaun
    >Rimmer - after it had almost been cast into the skip)

    Shaun does sheds, too? ;-)

    > so bare with me!

    NOW I see what Shaun sees in yez......

    >I love that guy!

    And we thank you for it - he's been much improved of late.

    Nice RR, Kath, keep em coming. The frist mile is the toughest, and it's all downhill..... well, OK,
    it's all easier from there.

    Steve "Southern Poofta" Baker
     
  15. Bill Wheeler

    Bill Wheeler Guest

    On Tue, 3 Jun 2003 12:57:45 +0100, "Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote:

    >Ride Report Billington to Whalley (and back)

    [snip one of the most entertaining RR available!]

    >Kath.
    >

    Nice, Bill

    The mind serves properly as a window glass rather than as a reflector, that is, the mind should give
    an immediate view instead of an interpretation of the world.
    :-]
     
  16. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Craig Brossman <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > "Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    > news:[email protected]...
    > > I arrived at my destination completely exhausted, and very happy. It wasn't long before Shaun
    > > turned up to escort me back, so I knew I
    would
    > > be safe! Can you imagine how chuffed I was when he told me I had
    travelled
    > > almost a full mile there and back! I love that guy! Kath.
    > >
    >
    >
    > Untie that girl immediately and let her out of the basement, hasn't she suffered enough?

    Heheheheh - you'd think >',;~}~

    Shaun aRe - it's my turn next week..........heheheheheh............
     
  17. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    ClydesdaleMTB <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]t...
    >
    >
    > Shaun Rimmer wrote:
    > > Ride Report
    >
    > WHAT???? No pictures !?!?!?!?!?

    Nope - not yet. She has threatened to 'Lady Gadyier' (sp?) it soon, so, maybe then, eh?
    Heheheheheh......

    Shaun aRe
     
  18. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Stephen Baker <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > Kath says:
    >
    > >Dressed for the part (well, I selotaped the bottom of my trousers round my ankles)
    >
    > Man, you can tell the Northerners from a mile off. ;-P

    Yeah - we know better than to use twisties like you lot, heheheh..........

    > >the shed, (recently lovingly reconditioned by the skilled but tender hands of the gorgeous Mr
    > >Shaun Rimmer - after it had almost been cast into the
    skip)
    >
    > Shaun does sheds, too? ;-)

    Don't be daaaaffft! ',;~}~

    > > so bare with me!
    >
    > NOW I see what Shaun sees in yez......

    You don't know the half of it........heheheh........

    > >I love that guy!
    >
    > And we thank you for it - he's been much improved of late.

    I've always been ace, but now I'm much 'acer', heheheheh.........

    > Nice RR, Kath, keep em coming. The frist mile is the toughest, and it's
    all
    > downhill..... well, OK, it's all easier from there.

    I'll pass this on Steve.

    > Steve "Southern Poofta" Baker

    Cheers Shandy Pants! ',;~}~

    Shaun aRe
     
  19. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Heyyyy! And yet another one - this from a guy of very few words, unless he's preaching about single
    speed bikes, heheheh......... You have a fan club here now! :

    Bill Wheeler <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]...
    > On Tue, 3 Jun 2003 12:57:45 +0100, "Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    > >Ride Report Billington to Whalley (and back)
    >
    > [snip one of the most entertaining RR available!]
    >
    > >Kath.
    > >
    >
    > Nice, Bill
    >
    >
    > The mind serves properly as a window glass rather than as a reflector, that is, the mind should
    > give an immediate view instead of an interpretation of the world.
    > :-]
     
  20. Shaun Rimmer

    Shaun Rimmer Guest

    Dave W <[email protected]> wrote in message news:p[email protected]...
    > On Tue, 3 Jun 2003 16:03:40 +0100, "Shaun Rimmer" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    > >
    > >Gyp <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
    > >> Shaun Rimmer wrote:
    > >> > Ride Report
    > >> <Still laughing from reading the post> <Chuckle>
    > >
    > >She's a smart girl, and out matches my wit on many an occasion (all the occasions
    > >actually....heheheheheheheh!).
    >
    > Is that really saying alot?

    Heheheheh - Gotcha, hook, line, and stinker, heheheheh - you really are quite the epitome of
    'stupid-slow' ',;~}~

    Shaun aRe - 'I love it when a plan comes together.....' '
     
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