Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: Light and Healthy Baki^H^H^H^HDesserts"

Discussion in 'Food and nutrition' started by Ubiquitous, Oct 3, 2005.

  1. ANIM8Rfsk

    ANIM8Rfsk Guest

    in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    [email protected] wrote on 11/1/05 5:34 PM:

    > [email protected] wrote:
    >> Ubiquitous wrote:
    >>> [email protected] wrote:

    >
    >>>> I saw the meringue episode and opening the pudding package sideways and
    >>>> spilling half of it. I still don't get her idea of adding vanilla
    >>>> extract to Cool Whip, it must be a delicacy is the Lee household. No
    >>>> wonder they are always swilling down the liquor at her house.
    >>>
    >>> I believe she once claimed that adding the vanilla extract makes it
    >>> taste like it was grown in her garden.

    >>
    >> I've heard her say it makes Cool Whip taste homemade. That's probably
    >> what you heard, too.

    >
    > I've heard that too, but she made the "fresh from the garden" taste
    > in another ep. I'll have to look it up.
    >
    >>>> Sandra is not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

    >>
    >> Nor is her producer.

    >
    > My theory is that he hates her and is passive-agressively sabotaging her.


    I have that theory about Martha Stewart, but I think the SLoP people are
    desperately trying to make a silk purse out of a sows ear - or a whole sow
    in this case.

    --

    You Can't Stop the Signal
     


  2. ANIM8Rfsk

    ANIM8Rfsk Guest

    in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    [email protected] wrote on 11/1/05 5:34 PM:

    > [email protected] wrote:
    >> Ubiquitous wrote:
    >>> [email protected] wrote:

    >
    >>>> I saw the meringue episode and opening the pudding package sideways and
    >>>> spilling half of it. I still don't get her idea of adding vanilla
    >>>> extract to Cool Whip, it must be a delicacy is the Lee household. No
    >>>> wonder they are always swilling down the liquor at her house.
    >>>
    >>> I believe she once claimed that adding the vanilla extract makes it
    >>> taste like it was grown in her garden.

    >>
    >> I've heard her say it makes Cool Whip taste homemade. That's probably
    >> what you heard, too.

    >
    > I've heard that too, but she made the "fresh from the garden" taste
    > in another ep. I'll have to look it up.
    >
    >>>> Sandra is not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

    >>
    >> Nor is her producer.

    >
    > My theory is that he hates her and is passive-agressively sabotaging her.


    I have that theory about Martha Stewart, but I think the SLoP people are
    desperately trying to make a silk purse out of a sows ear - or a whole sow
    in this case.

    --

    You Can't Stop the Signal
     
  3. Ubiquitous

    Ubiquitous Guest

    In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] wrote:

    >ObSandraLee:
    >Here's a screen grab someone was kind enough to make from yesterday's
    >ep, "All American Girl" showing her reaction to one of of her drinks.
    >
    >NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)


    It might help to post the URL!
    http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg

    --
    "Paper plates -- easy to get year round." Sandra Lee, "All American Girl
    Party"
     
  4. Ubiquitous

    Ubiquitous Guest

    In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] wrote:

    >ObSandraLee:
    >Here's a screen grab someone was kind enough to make from yesterday's
    >ep, "All American Girl" showing her reaction to one of of her drinks.
    >
    >NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)


    It might help to post the URL!
    http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg

    --
    "Paper plates -- easy to get year round." Sandra Lee, "All American Girl
    Party"
     
  5. ANIM8Rfsk

    ANIM8Rfsk Guest

    in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    [email protected] wrote on 11/2/05 5:00 PM:

    > In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] wrote:
    >
    >> ObSandraLee:
    >> Here's a screen grab someone was kind enough to make from yesterday's
    >> ep, "All American Girl" showing her reaction to one of of her drinks.
    >>
    >> NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)

    >
    > It might help to post the URL!
    > http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >

    In the post halloween spirit, one can happily imagine jason or freddie or
    michael coming at her in that last shot . ..

    --

    You Can't Stop the Signal
     
  6. [email protected] (Ubiquitous) looking for trouble wrote in
    news:[email protected]:

    > In article <[email protected]>, [email protected]
    > wrote:
    >
    >>ObSandraLee:
    >>Here's a screen grab someone was kind enough to make from yesterday's
    >>ep, "All American Girl" showing her reaction to one of of her drinks.
    >>
    >>NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)

    >
    > It might help to post the URL!
    > http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >
    > --
    > "Paper plates -- easy to get year round." Sandra Lee, "All American
    > Girl Party"


    The drink must be killing her off.

    Michael

    --
    Send email to dog30 at charter dot net
     
  7. ANIM8Rfsk <[email protected]> looking for trouble wrote in
    news:BF8EE355.5AA4B%[email protected]:

    > in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    > [email protected] wrote on 11/2/05 5:00 PM:
    >
    >> In article <[email protected]>, [email protected]
    >> wrote:
    >>
    >>> ObSandraLee:
    >>> Here's a screen grab someone was kind enough to make from
    >>> yesterday's ep, "All American Girl" showing her reaction to one of
    >>> of her drinks.
    >>>
    >>> NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)

    >>
    >> It might help to post the URL!
    >> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >>

    > In the post halloween spirit, one can happily imagine jason or freddie
    > or michael coming at her in that last shot . ..
    >


    I'm thinking either she's being slowly poisoned or she spies a huge meat
    cleaver sailing across the room at her.

    --
    Send email to dog30 at charter dot net
     
  8. ANIM8Rfsk

    ANIM8Rfsk Guest

    in article [email protected], Michael "Dog3" Lonergan
    at [email protected] wrote on 11/3/05 8:18 AM:

    > ANIM8Rfsk <[email protected]> looking for trouble wrote in
    > news:BF8EE355.5AA4B%[email protected]:
    >
    >> in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    >> [email protected] wrote on 11/2/05 5:00 PM:
    >>
    >>> In article <[email protected]>, [email protected]
    >>> wrote:
    >>>
    >>>> ObSandraLee:
    >>>> Here's a screen grab someone was kind enough to make from
    >>>> yesterday's ep, "All American Girl" showing her reaction to one of
    >>>> of her drinks.
    >>>>
    >>>> NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)
    >>>
    >>> It might help to post the URL!
    >>> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >>>

    >> In the post halloween spirit, one can happily imagine jason or freddie
    >> or michael coming at her in that last shot . ..
    >>

    >
    > I'm thinking either she's being slowly poisoned or she spies a huge meat
    > cleaver sailing across the room at her.


    Either way, happy thoughts!

    --

    You Can't Stop the Signal
     
  9. On 03 Nov 2005 13:50:14 GMT, Nick <[email protected]> wrote:


    >>>> NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)
    >>>
    >>> Where is the pic?

    >>
    >> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg

    >
    >Wow, that pic actually makes her look unattractive.


    Honeymoon's over, huh Rick?

    pepsi
     
  10. Nick

    Nick Guest

    wrote:

    > On 03 Nov 2005 13:50:14 GMT, Nick <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    >
    >>>>> NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)
    >>>>
    >>>> Where is the pic?
    >>>
    >>> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg

    >>
    >> Wow, that pic actually makes her look unattractive.

    >
    > Honeymoon's over, huh Rick?


    Nah, I think our relationship is strong enough to survive one bad pic.
    But if I see another one...
     
  11. Rob.

    Rob. Guest

    "Ubiquitous" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]
    > OhgawdOhgawdOhgawd! I think I bust a gut from laughing!
    >
    > SLop enters with this startled look on her face, until now only seen on
    > Janet
    > Reno, carrying a piece of angel statuary. As the camera shows her putting
    > it in
    > the counter in extreme close up, a clumsy post-edit voice-over of her says
    > "NOW, I'm going to you ALL about the great BAKING we'll be doing today!!".
    > Apparently she thought this week's ep was "Light and Healthy BAKING". She
    > then
    > screws up that saying about "eating your cake and having it too" that
    > annoys me
    > to no end.
    >
    > When we return from the opening credits, SLop tells us it's going to be a
    > brilliant day because this ep is all about "Low fat light BAKING!". She
    > places
    > twelve wontons onto a baking sheet, telling us "You can put the wontons
    > next to
    > each other b/c they don't rise". But if they did rise, wouldn't that mean
    > that
    > they grew upward and not sideways? She mixes some "nice" honey with "NICE
    > hot
    > water" from the sink faucet. She bastes the wontons and then "puts the
    > wontons
    > back into the oven". Huh?
    >
    > For a filling, she mixes some "rich and thick and delicious" ricotta
    > cheese
    > with one cup of low fat sour cream (as she holds the Rachel Ray container
    > in
    > front of her mouth, a clumsy post-production voice-over "this WHOLE
    > container"
    > is heard) into a food processor, to which she cuts open, nearly spilling a
    > good
    > amount of the contents, and then adds, an envelope of instant vanilla
    > pudding
    > mix and some vanilla extract. Struggling with the food processor, she
    > scoops
    > the mixture into a bowl and adds some lemon zest so it tastes "nice and
    > fresh
    > and right out of her garden".
    >
    > Grabbing a baking sheet on the counter behind her, accompanied by a clumsy
    > post-production voice-over "Here are some that I made earlier", she
    > assembles
    > the vaugely-familiar napoleons with nine wontons by alternating wontons
    > with
    > the filling about three levels high. Strangely enough, I think I've seen
    > that
    > blue boat-shaped tray before... She confides that she adds vanilla or
    > strawberry extract to Cool Whip so it tastes homemade. She embellishes a
    > tub of
    > Rachel Ray Cool Whip, and uses a glad bag to apply a small dollop to the
    > napoleons, presumably throwing the rest of the Cool Whip away. She deep
    > throats
    > a large spoonful of the left-over pudding mixture as we bop out to
    > commercial
    > break.
    >
    > We return from commercial with SLop telling us this ep is all about "low
    > fat
    > deserts". I guess someone set her straight. Bringing out another tub of
    > Rachel
    > Ray Cool Whip, she declares she's going to make the phyllo cups. She opens
    > the
    > roll of phyllo dough, slaps it onto the counter and roughly rolls it open
    > on
    > the counter top, telling us to treat it gently because it's fragile.
    > A post-production voice-over adds "this is light and wonderful pastry".
    > She sprays PAM on it, makes some cinnamon sugar, sprinkles a pinch over
    > the
    > dough, adds another layer of dough, sprays it again with PAM, and
    > sprinkles
    > another layer of cinnamon sugar, topping it off with a final layer of
    > dough.
    > Using a pizza cutter, she cuts it into eight "square" rectangles and then
    > stuffs them into a muffin tin, babbling something about how no cup will be
    > identical in appearance. For some reason she uses half of the muffin tin,
    > skipping every other one as if it's going to expand when it is baked. She
    > creates a filling with instant chocolate pudding mix and instant eXpresso,
    > mixed with a hand mixer on low; otherwise you'll get powder EVERYWHERE.
    > She
    > pulls out the cups from the oven and fills three with chocolate pudding
    > and
    > eXpresso mix, using a Glad bag to fill the cups instead of a spoon and
    > then
    > uses an entire tub of Cool whip in a Glad bag to place a tiny off-center
    > dollop
    > on each and finally dusting with coco powder. Yes, she threw the rest of
    > both
    > bags away. SLop then attempts to deep throat one, only to have it audibly
    > shatter apart in her hands, forcing her to hastily exit stage right. I
    > guess
    > it's better than because she got third degree burns in her mouth and
    > throat.
    >
    > When we return from commercial break, SLop talks about how intimidated she
    > was
    > by making meringues and begins making something. Meringues, I assume.
    > After
    > whipping the meringues sufficiently, she cries "It's going to be
    > BEAUtiful!"
    > and she starts uncontrollably licking the RA whipper attachment before
    > dropping
    > it into the sink. A trick to make perfect meringue cakes, she tells us, is
    > to
    > place a salad plate on parchment paper and use a pencil to make outlines
    > for
    > the meringue. With all the solemnity of the Surgeon General, she pauses to
    > tell
    > us "This is VERY important! I want you to turn the parchment paper upside
    > down
    > because you do not want to bake on that lead! This is VERY important!" She
    > spreads the meringue into the shape of the saucer outlines to make disks.
    > She
    > pops them into the oven for an indeterminate time and says there two type
    > of
    > fillings. She begins with sugar free and fat free instant lemon pudding
    > mix and
    > adds milk. SLop is amazed at how fast it begins to "set up". For a second
    > layer, she takes a new tub of Rachel Ray Cool Whip, described by a series
    > of
    > clumsy post-production voice-overs as "a. Low-FAT. WHIPPED. Topping.". She
    > empties half into a bowl and adds some strawberries and strawberry extract
    > (so
    > it tastes homade?). She assembles the meringue cake by dumping half the
    > pudding
    > onto a meringue, topping it with another, then dumping some cool whip on
    > top,
    > topping it with a third meringue, some more pudding, and another meringue
    > and
    > the rest of the coolwhip. She garnishes it with a sprig of mint, some
    > strawberries she set aside, and some lemon zest.
    >
    > When we return from commercial, we can tell by the graphic on the screen
    > that
    > it's now "Sandra's Cocktail Time!". SL enters with a bottle of port wine.
    > Psyche! No cocktail time! In its place, she makes a dried fruit compote.
    > She
    > puts port and sugar into a pan to heat up, then adds a bunch of random
    > dried
    > fruits and cranberries (because they're worth it!) and boils it. She
    > exclaims
    > that she loves the fruit because it soaks up the port and sugar and then
    > spoons
    > out some that is at a roiling boil in a pan over some frozen yogurt which
    > somehow resists melting into a puddle. Grabbing a couple goblets of the
    > compote, she moseys over to the table scape at the "kiddie table". Oddly
    > enough, the tablescape is rather tame, consisting of cloth remnants in
    > this
    > week's color (lavendar) with fake purple rose petals strewn about. The
    > compote
    > glasses are set on big silver serving platters like you'd see at King
    > Henry
    > VIII's dinner. Sandra shows us her "clever" idea of stuffing the napkins
    > into
    > the lavendar coffee cups on the table before pimping the web site and
    > exiting
    > with a double baby-claw wave.
    >
    > --
    > "Paper plates -- easy to get year round." Sandra Lee, "All American Girl
    > Party"
    >
    >
    >



    OH MY GAWD! GRODY! HE HE HO HGO HA HA FO
     
  12. On 04 Nov 2005 16:45:32 GMT, Nick <[email protected]> wrote:

    > wrote:
    >
    >> On 03 Nov 2005 13:50:14 GMT, Nick <[email protected]> wrote:
    >>
    >>
    >>>>>> NB: Make sure your mouth is empty when viewing this! :)
    >>>>>
    >>>>> Where is the pic?
    >>>>
    >>>> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >>>
    >>> Wow, that pic actually makes her look unattractive.

    >>
    >> Honeymoon's over, huh Rick?

    >
    >Nah, I think our relationship is strong enough to survive one bad pic.
    >But if I see another one...


    I did mean Nick, not Rick. Glad you took it well.

    pepsi
     
  13. Ubiquitous

    Ubiquitous Guest

    In article <BF8F7FC2.5AB43%[email protected]>, [email protected] wrote:
    >in article [email protected], Michael "Dog3" Lonergan
    >at [email protected] wrote on 11/3/05 8:18 AM:
    >> ANIM8Rfsk <[email protected]> looking for trouble wrote in
    >> news:BF8EE355.5AA4B%[email protected]:
    >>> in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    >>> [email protected] wrote on 11/2/05 5:00 PM:


    >>>> It might help to post the URL!
    >>>> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >>>>
    >>> In the post halloween spirit, one can happily imagine jason or freddie
    >>> or michael coming at her in that last shot . ..

    >>
    >> I'm thinking either she's being slowly poisoned or she spies a huge meat
    >> cleaver sailing across the room at her.

    >
    >Either way, happy thoughts!


    Heh heh heh. IIRC, she fled, stage left, after almsot choking on that drink.
    It serves the broad right.

    --
    "Paper plates -- easy to get year round." Sandra Lee, "All American Girl Party"
     
  14. Ubiquitous

    Ubiquitous Guest

    In article <BF8F7FC2.5AB43%[email protected]>, [email protected] wrote:
    >in article [email protected], Michael "Dog3" Lonergan
    >at [email protected] wrote on 11/3/05 8:18 AM:
    >> ANIM8Rfsk <[email protected]> looking for trouble wrote in
    >> news:BF8EE355.5AA4B%[email protected]:
    >>> in article [email protected], Ubiquitous at
    >>> [email protected] wrote on 11/2/05 5:00 PM:


    >>>> It might help to post the URL!
    >>>> http://www.tdiggs.net/twop-bonus-08.jpg
    >>>>
    >>> In the post halloween spirit, one can happily imagine jason or freddie
    >>> or michael coming at her in that last shot . ..

    >>
    >> I'm thinking either she's being slowly poisoned or she spies a huge meat
    >> cleaver sailing across the room at her.

    >
    >Either way, happy thoughts!


    Heh heh heh. IIRC, she fled, stage left, after almsot choking on that drink.
    It serves the broad right.

    --
    "Paper plates -- easy to get year round." Sandra Lee, "All American Girl Party"
     
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