So help me Gawd



roadhouse

New Member
Aug 2, 2009
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When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that God doesn't work that way.

So I stole a bike and asked Him to forgive me.
 
Hahaha....
That is good one but little old. I heard that before.
Here let me share one with you.

The blind man
A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to
the blind man and hands him a menu. "I'm sorry sir, but I am blind and can't read the menu. Just
bring me a dirty fork from the previous customer, I'll smell it and order from there."
A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns
to the blind man's table and hands it to him.
The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath. "Ah, yes that's what I'll have,
meatloaf and mashed potatoes." Unbelievable, the owner says to himself as he walks towards the
kitchen.
The cook happens to be the owner's wife and he tells her what had just happened. The blind man
eats his meal and leaves.
Several days later the blind man returns and the owner mistakenly brings him a menu again. "Sir,
remember me? I'm the blind man."
"I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. I'll go get you a dirty fork." The owner again retrieves a dirty fork
and brings it to the blind man. After another deep breath, the blind man says, "That smells great, I'll
take the Macaroni and cheese with broccoli."
Once again walking away in disbelief, the owner thinks the blind man is screwing around with him
and tells his wife that the next time the blind man comes in he's going to test him. The blind man
eats and leaves.
He returns the following week, but this time the owner see's him coming and runs to the kitchen.
He tells his wife, "Mary rub this fork around your vagina before I take it to the blind man." Mary
complies and hands her husband the fork back. As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner
is ready and waiting.
"Good afternoon sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you."
The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff and says, "Hey I didn't know that Mary
worked here?"