Team Saturn Goodbye

[Tom Kunich]

After 12 years of sponsorship and winning the national title, the biggest races and posting the
Saturn label on just about everything in US cycling Saturn has decided to hang up their
clipless cleats.

"We had to take a frank look at our real audience and to tell you the truth they are a bunch of beer
guzzling lard asses who sit in front of their TV's, watch football, and fart alot, not these whimpy
pencil armed ecofreaks on two wheels," said Renzo Salesalot, marketing director for the GM
subsidiary who for years have been trying to appear to be something they aren't.

 

[David Laporte]

It's the nature of sponsorships that they eventually end. A 12 year run is amazing. During
that time, Saturn did a huge service to the sport of bicycle racing and I will always be
grateful to them.

Here's hoping that Tom Shuler and find a replacement.

David

David LaPorte Nature Valley Grand Prix

-----------------------

Tom Kunich wrote:

> After 12 years of sponsorship and winning the national title, the biggest races and posting the
> Saturn label on just about everything in US cycling Saturn has decided to hang up their
> clipless cleats.
>
> "We had to take a frank look at our real audience and to tell you the truth they are a bunch of
> beer guzzling lard asses who sit in front of their TV's, watch football, and fart alot, not these
> whimpy pencil armed ecofreaks on two wheels," said Renzo Salesalot, marketing director for the GM
> subsidiary who for years have been trying to appear to be something they aren't.

 

[Nick Burns]

"Tom Kunich" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> After 12 years of sponsorship and winning the national title, the biggest races and posting the
> Saturn label on just about everything in US cycling Saturn has decided to hang up their
> clipless cleats.
>
> "We had to take a frank look at our real audience and to tell you the truth they are a bunch of
> beer guzzling lard asses who sit in front of their TV's, watch football, and fart alot, not these
> whimpy pencil armed ecofreaks on two wheels," said Renzo Salesalot, marketing director for the GM
> subsidiary who for years have been trying to appear to be something they aren't.

I know the quotes you placed in this article a phony (that IS Saturn's demographic) so now I have to
wonder if Saturn is truly pulling out or if the whole thing is your idea of a joke.

 

[Steven L. Sheff]

On 09/17/2003 08:47 PM, in article [email protected], "Tom
Kunich" <[email protected]> wrote:

> After 12 years of sponsorship and winning the national title, the biggest races and posting the
> Saturn label on just about everything in US cycling Saturn has decided to hang up their
> clipless cleats.
>
> "We had to take a frank look at our real audience and to tell you the truth they are a bunch of
> beer guzzling lard asses who sit in front of their TV's, watch football, and fart alot, not these
> whimpy pencil armed ecofreaks on two wheels," said Renzo Salesalot, marketing director for the GM
> subsidiary who for years have been trying to appear to be something they aren't.

Personally, this particular Saturn owner is thankful that they stayed in the sport as long as they
did ... Their sponsorship certainly influenced our purchase.

Granted, their timing sucks ... Why not announce at the BEGINNING of the year to give the team a
better chance at finding new sponsorship ... But I'm not going to give them **** for ending their
sponsorship.

--
Steven L. Sheffield stevens at veloworks dot com veloworks at worldnet dot ay tea tee dot net bellum
pax est libertas servitus est ignoratio vis est ess ay ell tea ell ay kay ee sea aye tee why you ti
ay aitch aitch tee tea pea colon [for word] slash [four ward] slash double-you double-yew double-ewe
dot veloworks dot com [four word] slash

 

[David Miller]

a lot is two words...

"Nick Burns" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Tom Kunich" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
> > After 12 years of sponsorship and winning the national title, the biggest races and posting the
> > Saturn label on just about everything in US cycling Saturn has decided to hang up their clipless
> > cleats.
> >
> > "We had to take a frank look at our real audience and to tell you the truth they are a bunch of
> > beer guzzling lard asses who sit in front of their TV's, watch football, and fart alot, not
> > these whimpy pencil armed ecofreaks on two wheels," said Renzo Salesalot, marketing director for
> > the GM subsidiary who for years have been trying to appear to be something they aren't.
>
> I know the quotes you placed in this article a phony (that IS Saturn's demographic) so now I have
> to wonder if Saturn is truly pulling out or if the whole thing is your idea of a joke.

 

[Bob Schwartz]

Steven L. Sheffield <[email protected]> wrote:
> Personally, this particular Saturn owner is thankful that they stayed in the sport as long as they
> did ... Their sponsorship certainly influenced our purchase.

> Granted, their timing sucks ... Why not announce at the BEGINNING of the year to give the team a
> better chance at finding new sponsorship ... But I'm not going to give them **** for ending their
> sponsorship.

Shuler knows the date on the contract, he knows how renewals have gone in the past. So I'll bet he's
known for some time already. This is just the public announcement.

Bob Schwartz [email protected]

 

[Tom Kunich]

"David LaPorte" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> It's the nature of sponsorships that they eventually end. A 12 year
run
> is amazing. During that time, Saturn did a huge service to the
sport of
> bicycle racing and I will always be grateful to them.
>
> Here's hoping that Tom Shuler and find a replacement.

No complaints about Saturn, just getting a laugh at their expense.

 

[Tom Kunich]

"Nick Burns" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> I know the quotes you placed in this article a phony

Geez, do you really think?

 

[Scott]

"Bob Schwartz" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> Shuler knows the date on the contract, he knows how renewals have gone in the past. So I'll bet
> he's known for some time already. This is just the public announcement.

not really. TeamSports thought they had it.

 

[Nick Burns]

"Tom Kunich" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> "Nick Burns" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
> >
> > I know the quotes you placed in this article a phony
>
> Geez, do you really think?

The point Tom, is that you should have given a source to avoid creating the impression that the
entire article was a joke.

 

[Chris]

All kidding aside, since when are cyclists considered eco-freaks? Look at almost any cyclist and
most don't give a **** about the environment. I make this assessment based on a number of things,
including the volume of trash they arbitrarily throw on the ground. Does the public perceive us
eco-freaks? Perhaps, but more likely, we're just another nuisance slowing them down on their way to
the local beer joint to watch said football.

CH

> > "We had to take a frank look at our real audience and to tell you the truth they are a bunch of
> > beer guzzling lard asses who sit in front of their TV's, watch football, and fart alot, not
> > these whimpy pencil armed ecofreaks on two wheels," said Renzo Salesalot, marketing director for
> > the GM subsidiary who for years have been trying to appear to be something they aren't.
>
> I know the quotes you placed in this article a phony (that IS Saturn's demographic) so now I have
> to wonder if Saturn is truly pulling out or if the whole thing is your idea of a joke.

 

[Bob Schwartz]

Scott <[email protected]> wrote:
> "Bob Schwartz" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
>> Shuler knows the date on the contract, he knows how renewals have gone in the past. So I'll bet
>> he's known for some time already. This is just the public announcement.

> not really. TeamSports thought they had it.

I stand corrected.

Does anyone know if this represents a total change in marketing direction or just involves the team?
The reason I ask is that I know Saturn made a lot of money available to local dealerships to promote
cycling related organizations and events. If they are re-directing their marketing efforts
completely away from the sport then I can think of a number of events that will most likely go away
and some clubs that will lose a sponsor.

I guess we'll know for sure soon enough.

Bob Schwartz [email protected]

 

[Runkle]

<[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Volume of trash they throw on the ground? I always finish my rides with a pocket full of empty gel
> packets, punctured tubes or patch backing, or whatever else i have used on the road. I don't leave
> **** behind, as I am sure the majority of cyclists don't. And now I wait for the customary bashing
> for having webtv.
>

Webtv...ha ha. You suck.

 

[Tom Kunich]

<[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Volume of trash they throw on the ground? I always finish my rides
with
> a pocket full of empty gel packets, punctured tubes or patch
backing, or
> whatever else i have used on the road. I don't leave **** behind, as
I
> am sure the majority of cyclists don't. And now I wait for the
customary
> bashing for having webtv.

Hey Bob, can't you tell an eco-freak when you read them? He's talking about the glue fumes and the
celophane cover on the tire patch I always allow to blow away on the wind.

 

[Tom Kunich]

"Scribe2b" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> so, now my mark mccormack team lemond bike is at pasture with my
sean yates
> motorola caloi merckx. days of glory resonating from both...

Talk about shallow.

 

[Scribe2b]

gee mr tom kunich,

i never realized that preserving these race bikes is shallow, but now that you point it out, yes,
it is truly lame.

i was born in 1943 and dont race. when i did i was never any good either, not like you must be. but
i can put my remaining energy to good use.

first off i will take back the frank kramer bike on loan to the hall of fame and put it in a
crusher. that major taylor iver johnson and his autobio signed to web dubois too. and the pop
brennan and others. what a relief!

thanks mr kunich for all your sardonic comments, (but do remember to take your meds for the
self-loathing you seem to suffer from so deeply.)

ever so shallowly yours, (also a pathetic eco-freak) jere cunningham

 

[Kurgan Gringion]

"Scribe2b" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> gee mr tom kunich,
>
> i never realized that preserving these race bikes is shallow, but now that
you
> point it out, yes, it is truly lame.

Dumbass -

I agree - you should spend that money on a large SUV instead. It is the American Way.

K. Gringioni large SUV driver

ps. my Large SUV gets 9 mpg.

 

[Tom Kunich]

Here's a clue Team Stupid: read all fo the postings first, then respond. BTW, being a couple of
months older than me doesn't qualify you as having more wisdom.

"Scribe2b" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> gee mr tom kunich,
>
> i never realized that preserving these race bikes is shallow, but
now that you
> point it out, yes, it is truly lame.
>
> i was born in 1943 and dont race. when i did i was never any good
either, not
> like you must be. but i can put my remaining energy to good use.
>
> first off i will take back the frank kramer bike on loan to the
hall of fame
> and put it in a crusher. that major taylor iver johnson and his
autobio signed
> to web dubois too. and the pop brennan and others. what a relief!
>
> thanks mr kunich for all your sardonic comments, (but do remember
to take your
> meds for the self-loathing you seem to suffer from so deeply.)
>
> ever so shallowly yours, (also a pathetic eco-freak) jere cunningham

 

[Runkle]

That's true. A sign of true wisdom is having a clever newsgroup name like Scribe2b.

"Tom Kunich" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Here's a clue Team Stupid: read all fo the postings first, then respond. BTW, being a couple of
> months older than me doesn't qualify you as having more wisdom.
>
>
> "Scribe2b" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
> > gee mr tom kunich,
> >
> > i never realized that preserving these race bikes is shallow, but
> now that you
> > point it out, yes, it is truly lame.
> >
> > i was born in 1943 and dont race. when i did i was never any good
> either, not
> > like you must be. but i can put my remaining energy to good use.
> >
> > first off i will take back the frank kramer bike on loan to the
> hall of fame
> > and put it in a crusher. that major taylor iver johnson and his
> autobio signed
> > to web dubois too. and the pop brennan and others. what a relief!
> >
> > thanks mr kunich for all your sardonic comments, (but do remember
> to take your
> > meds for the self-loathing you seem to suffer from so deeply.)
> >
> > ever so shallowly yours, (also a pathetic eco-freak) jere cunningham