Teenagers with Hummers coming - beware



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"Mike Kruger" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
> "W K" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> >
> > You mean that people are driving vehicles named after slang for an erect penis?
> >
> >
> Here's the hummer site. http://www.hummer.com/hummerjsp/index.jsp
>
> Trust me, this is NOT a satire site.

I just love the H1 propaganda,

" A vehicle that can go almost anywhere and do almost anything. One that gives you an incredible
freedom and allows you to experiance the world and your place in it like never before."

This would apply more to a bicycle than a $100K vehicle.
 
"Barry Gaudet" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> W K <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> : "Barry Gaudet" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> : news:[email protected]...
> :> Frank Burke <[email protected]> wrote:
> :> : testicles? hummers? Is this the trace of irony mentioned below?
> :>
> :> I was thinking along the same lines. When I was a teenager I thought alot about getting a
> :> hummer but it wasn't a vehicle.
>
> : We don't speak the same language here I'm afraid.
>
> : You mean that people are driving vehicles named after slang for an erect penis?
>
> Herabouts it's slang for a certain oral act performed on an erect penis.

Aha. Does this mean we'll be seeing the "Ford Blowjob" in the near future.
 
Just zis Guy, you know? <[email protected]> wrote:
: On Mon, 20 Jan 2003 21:59:44 GMT, "Pete" <[email protected]> wrote:

:>images.google.com for wwii bicycle turns up a lot of hits

: The last WWII bike I saw was being ridden by Sir David Money-Coutts, formerly bank manager to HM
: the Queen Mother, on a sponsored cycle ride. It was, as far as I could tell, solid rust from front
: to back - and he managed an incredible distance on it.

I was looking around for info on the Swiss Army Bike. There have been attempts to brand it for
consumers like the Swiss Army knife. Also I found sites that advertise a Swiss Army knife with
tools for a cyclist,

http://www.cleardeals.com/products/swiss_army_bike.html http://www.4abnet.com/mountainbike.html

And sites about the SA Bike.

http://www.63xc.com/stefs/sabike.htm http://www.sportingagencies.com.au/sa/swissbike/

Sadly though the Swiss Army has abandoned the bike:

http://archive.nandotimes.com/noframes/story/0,2107,500471979-500723240-504055292-0,00.html

'ROMONT, Switzerland (April 9, 2001 4:02 p.m. EDT) - A proud and unique part of the Alpine nation's
sturdy defenses, the Swiss army bicycle brigade is set to follow the mounted cavalry and carrier
pigeon service into history.

The abolition of the world's last remaining combat cyclist regiment - along with a 2,800-strong
transport horse unit - is part of sweeping Defense Ministry reforms to modernize and rationalize
Switzerland's militia army.' [...] 'The cyclists were introduced in 1891 against considerable
opposition from the cavalry. They eventually became a backbone of the Swiss defense force because
they were swifter and more discreet than infantry and motorized units.

The Swiss army bike - just like the knife - also became the stuff of legend, with the single-gear
model used from 1905 until 1993 now a collectors' item.'

[the following sounds ideal for the urban cyclist]

'The current seven-gear model has attachments for machine guns, bazookas, grenade launchers and
basic army kits, and can carry up to 330 pounds, including the rider. The bike weighs 48 pounds. It
can travel 37 mph downhill, as demonstrated by the recruits who whiz through the central Swiss
countryside, oblivious to slippery roads.

Leuenberger spent two decades with the bike brigade and now heads a training school that provides
15 weeks of basic drilling for about 250 recruits each year.

"They come in as civilians and they leave as real cyclists," Leuenberger declared with
satisfaction.

Many Swiss resent military conscription, but the cyclists show a special spirit. The regiment is
oversubscribed because it is perfect training for potential world class athletes: 1996 Olympic road
race champion Pascal Richard passed through the ranks.' [...] 'Reform plans are still in draft
form, and must be debated by parliament later this year. If adopted, they will become law in 2003.

Few within the army hope for a reprieve.

"We ask ourselves why the cyclists should go," said Julian Wolffray, a chemistry laboratory
assistant. "We are quick and silent. And we don't need gas."'

--
'People think I'm insane because I am frowning all the time All day long I think of things
but nothing seems to satisfy' 'Make a joke and I will sigh And you will laugh and I will
cry' -Black Sabbath
 
> Aha. Does this mean we'll be seeing the "Ford Blowjob" in the near future.

That's a limited edition only available to politicians and regulators.
 
18 Jan 2003 17:52:47 -0800, R.White :
>> Here's the hummer site. http://www.hummer.com/hummerjsp/index.jsp
>>
>> Trust me, this is NOT a satire site.
>
> I just love the H1 propaganda,
>
> " A vehicle that can go almost anywhere and do almost anything. One that gives you an incredible
> freedom and allows you to experiance the world and your place in it like never before."
>
> This would apply more to a bicycle than a $100K vehicle.

http://www.hummer.com/hummerjsp/popups/h2/images/h2_bike.jpg

EXTRA WHEELS

HUMMER Mountain Bike

Like the HUMMER itself, the HUMMER Mountain Bike is durable, functional and tough as nails. Created
for U.S. Marine paratroopers by the Montague Corporation, its rugged design allows it to be dropped
from military aircraft, traverse any terrain at high speeds, and fold into a compact 3ft. by 3ft.
portable size with the turn of one quick release lever.

Why is it a folding bike? Hummer is so big, that taking normal bike will be no problem. But normal
bikes are not so cool.

maciek
--
Szybki jak [Romet] Wicher
 
> http://www.hummer.com/hummerjsp/popups/h2/images/h2_bike.jpg
>
> EXTRA WHEELS
>
> HUMMER Mountain Bike
>
> Like the HUMMER itself, the HUMMER Mountain Bike is durable, functional and tough as nails.
> Created for U.S. Marine paratroopers by the Montague Corporation, its rugged design allows it to
> be dropped from military aircraft, traverse any terrain at high speeds, and fold into a compact
> 3ft. by 3ft. portable size with the turn of one quick release lever.
>
> Why is it a folding bike? Hummer is so big, that taking normal bike will be no problem. But normal
> bikes are not so cool.

But normal bikes aren't mil-spec!

The hummer seeks to bring paramilitary charm to the Vast Waistline of America. When you absolutely
cannot be intimidated by anything else on the road, you buy a Hummer (surplus main battle tanks
being rather difficult to come by).

I'm frankly surprised they aren't supplying them with Stinger surface-to-air missiles or Browning
MA-2 heavy machine gun mountings.

Besides, Arnhold, die Schwartze Tod himself, owns a dozen of them. Who doesn't want to be like the
Terminator/Kindergarten Cop?

Speaking of military bicycles, does anybody know of a URL to find photos of WW2 troops on bikes?
I know I've seen a photo of German troops invading Czechoslovakia on bicycles. And then there
were Yamashita's troops, who did some pretty extreme cycling down the Malay peninsula and storm
Singapore--the relevant photo I remember is an action shot of troops riding into battle,
dismounting, abandoning the bikes, and skirmishing. Then there are the photos of the late
lamented swiss bike troops... And the great photo of the bicycle supply corps working the Ho Chi
Minh trail...

-Luigi

"The enemy attacks; we retreat. The enemy encamps; we harass. The enemy tires; we attack. The enemy
retreats; we pursue."

>
>
> maciek
 
"Luigi de Guzman" <[email protected]> wrote
>
> Speaking of military bicycles, does anybody know of a URL to find photos of WW2 troops on bikes? I
> know I've seen a photo of German troops invading Czechoslovakia on bicycles. And then there were
> Yamashita's troops, who did some pretty extreme cycling down the Malay peninsula and storm
> Singapore--the relevant photo I remember is an action shot of troops riding into battle,
> dismounting, abandoning the bikes, and skirmishing. Then there are the photos of the late lamented
> swiss bike troops... And the great photo of the bicycle supply corps working the Ho Chi Minh
> trail...
>

http://bcoy1cpb.pacdat.net/bsa_airborne_bicycles_(aka_parabike).htm
http://www.bewellweb.com/k19943p/rafbike.htm http://www.marspec.net/430542.html (Swiss, you can
evidently buy these) http://www.lonestar-mvpa.org/images/02_gtu12.JPG

images.google.com for wwii bicycle turns up a lot of hits

This site has LOTS of old bike pics

Pete
 
> Besides, Arnhold, die Schwartze Tod himself, owns a dozen of them. Who doesn't want to be like the
> Terminator/Kindergarten Cop?
>
> Speaking of military bicycles, does anybody know of a URL to find photos of WW2 troops on bikes? I
> know I've seen a photo of German troops invading Czechoslovakia on bicycles. And then there were
> Yamashita's troops, who did some pretty extreme cycling down the Malay peninsula and storm
> Singapore--the relevant photo I remember is an action shot of troops riding into battle,
> dismounting, abandoning the bikes, and skirmishing. Then there are the photos of the late lamented
> swiss bike troops... And the great photo of the bicycle supply corps working the Ho Chi Minh
> trail...
>
> -Luigi
>
> "The enemy attacks; we retreat. The enemy encamps; we harass. The enemy tires; we attack. The
> enemy retreats; we pursue."
>
>
> >
> >
> > maciek

damn those intellectuals. Always bringing things up. The British Army had bicycle messengers at
Gallipoli, Turkey in WWI. Unfortunately they dropped them at the foot of a high sand bluff on a
rocky beach. I too was impressed by the Japanese southward run thru the Malay Peninsula. Obviously
bicycles were highly important to them there, allowing them to speed down the jungle tracks.
 
On Mon, 20 Jan 2003 21:59:44 GMT, "Pete" <[email protected]> wrote:

>images.google.com for wwii bicycle turns up a lot of hits

The last WWII bike I saw was being ridden by Sir David Money-Coutts, formerly bank manager to HM the
Queen Mother, on a sponsored cycle ride. It was, as far as I could tell, solid rust from front to
back - and he managed an incredible distance on it.

Guy
===
** WARNING ** This posting may contain traces of irony. http://www.chapmancentral.com (BT ADSL and
dynamic DNS permitting)
NOTE: BT Openworld have now blocked port 25 (without notice), so old mail addresses may no longer
work. Apologies.
 
"Just zis Guy, you know?" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:<[email protected]>...
> On Mon, 20 Jan 2003 21:59:44 GMT, "Pete" <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> >images.google.com for wwii bicycle turns up a lot of hits
>
> The last WWII bike I saw was being ridden by Sir David Money-Coutts, formerly bank manager to HM
> the Queen Mother, on a sponsored cycle ride. It was, as far as I could tell, solid rust from front
> to back - and he managed an incredible distance on it.
>

Money-Coutts isn't skint; was he riding the old WWII bike as part of the gimmick of the ride, or
couldn't he be bothered to get a new cycle?

If I had his cash....

I'd have a nic warm place to live. and a dry locked place to keep my bike.

minimum.

-Luigi

> Guy
> ===
> ** WARNING ** This posting may contain traces of irony. http://www.chapmancentral.com (BT ADSL and
> dynamic DNS permitting)
> NOTE: BT Openworld have now blocked port 25 (without notice), so old mail addresses may no longer
> work. Apologies.
 
In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] (Hunrobe) wrote:

> >"H. M. Leary" [email protected]
>
> wrote:
>
> >Maybe they are smart enough to get the best protection and reliability for their children. I wish
> >I could afford a BMW. I had to use my wifes life insurance to get my daughter an X5, but I sleep
> >better at night knowing she drives one.
> >
> >I think Bob is just a little jealous, or maybe he wants a better bike.
> >
> >Ride Safe
>
>
> Whether or not the X5 is any safer than many less expensive vehicles aside, exactly *how* did you
> use your wife's life insurance to purchase it? Was it a loan against the policy or did you have to
> file a claim? I hope that if it was the latter that your daughter's "need" for an X5 in no way
> contributed to the first requirement of filing that claim. <g> As for my being jealous you may
> believe it or not but you couldn't *give* me an X5, not unless I could sell it and buy a real
> truck. Poor acceleration and poor handling are forgiveable in a truck that has a useful cargo
> area/capacity but not in a vehicle that is a passenger vehicle. And of course I'd like another
> bike! Who among us wouldn't? <g>
>
> Regards, Bob Hunt
>
>

Go test drive an X5 with the 4.6 V8. fast enough for anyone except maybe the Porsche Cayenne wich is
supposed to go 165 and 0-60mph in 4.2 seconds.

Still can¹t outrun the Motorola, however.

Ride Safe

I want a Calfee Dragonfly ...... Wahhhhh

--
³Freedom Is a Light for Which Many Have Died in Darkness³

- Tomb of the unknown - American Revolution
 
[email protected] (Hunrobe) wrote in news:[email protected]:

>>"H. M. Leary" [email protected]
>
> wrote:
>
>>Maybe they are smart enough to get the best protection and reliability for their children. I wish
>>I could afford a BMW. I had to use my wifes life insurance to get my daughter an X5, but I sleep
>>better at night knowing she drives one.
>>
>>I think Bob is just a little jealous, or maybe he wants a better bike.
>>
>>Ride Safe
>
>
> Whether or not the X5 is any safer than many less expensive vehicles aside, exactly *how* did you
> use your wife's life insurance to purchase it?

Probably knocked her off.
 
"H. M. Leary" wrote:
> Go test drive an X5 with the 4.6 V8. fast enough for anyone except maybe the Porsche Cayenne wich
> is supposed to go 165 and 0-60mph in 4.2 seconds.

I'm sure every parent wants their teenager driving a car that can go 165mph.

Yeah, that's the ticket--errr toe tag.

--Bill Davidson
--
Please remove ".nospam" from my address for email replies.
 
In article <[email protected]>,
Bill Davidson <[email protected]> wrote:

> "H. M. Leary" wrote:
> > Go test drive an X5 with the 4.6 V8. fast enough for anyone except maybe the Porsche Cayenne
> > wich is supposed to go 165 and 0-60mph in 4.2 seconds.
>
> I'm sure every parent wants their teenager driving a car that can go 165mph.
>
> Yeah, that's the ticket--errr toe tag.
>
> --Bill Davidson

You have posted out of context which is ok.

You can get killed standing still, too.

Ride Safe

--
"Freedom Is a Light for Which Many Have Died in Darkness"

- Tomb of the unknown - American Revolution
 
Us old guys remember high school parking lots full of Hemis,Superbirds,Big block SS's and lot of
other truly dangerous cars with drum brakes,bias-ply tires ect.The kids were all rite.All cars are
race cars to most teens and most still make it to adulthood.Worry more about sending them to fight
silly wars to protect society's"right" to a lifestyle. "H. M. Leary" <[email protected]> wrote
in message news:[email protected]...
> In article <[email protected]>,
> Bill Davidson <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > "H. M. Leary" wrote:
> > > Go test drive an X5 with the 4.6 V8. fast enough for anyone except
maybe
> > > the Porsche Cayenne wich is supposed to go 165 and 0-60mph in 4.2 seconds.
> >
> > I'm sure every parent wants their teenager driving a car that can go
165mph.
> >
> > Yeah, that's the ticket--errr toe tag.
> >
> > --Bill Davidson
>
> You have posted out of context which is ok.
>
> You can get killed standing still, too.
>
> Ride Safe
>
> --
> "Freedom Is a Light for Which Many Have Died in Darkness"
>
> - Tomb of the unknown - American Revolution
 
On Tue, 21 Jan 2003 15:47:36 GMT, "Ilambert" <[email protected]> wrote:

>Us old guys remember high school parking lots full of Hemis,Superbirds,Big block SS's and lot of
>other truly dangerous cars with drum brakes,bias-ply tires ect.The kids were all rite.All cars are
>race cars to most teens and most still make it to adulthood.Worry more about sending them to fight
>silly wars to protect society's"right" to a lifestyle. "H. M. Leary" <[email protected]>
>wrote in message news:[email protected]...

snips

Don't wax too nostalgic about the good ole days. Not all of them made
it. In 1965 or 1966, I was going to college and working parttime as a newspaper photographer.

One of the local rich families with more money than brains gave their kid a brand-new Corvette. He
loaded it with his friends and took it out to show how fast it would go. After he flipped it, it
burst into flames.

When I got there, there was nothing left of the fiberglass body. It was just steel frame and
corpses. Right after that, I made sure a fire extinguisher was always in the car. My greatest fear
was that someday I'd roll up on something like that and not have something to at least try to help.

A buddy of mine was the deputy sheriff who worked the wreck. He came into the criminology class we
were both in and asked the instructor if he could borrow her notes to study for an upcoming exam.

She had become a pretty good friend of ours outside of class, so she pretended to give him a hard
time: "OK, but you better have a good excuse. What happened to YOUR notes?"

"I used them to wipe some dead kids off my hands," he said, quietly.

THAT was one she'd never heard before.

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In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] (Hunrobe) wrote:

> >"H. M. Leary" [email protected]
>
> wrote:
>
> >Go test drive an X5 with the 4.6 V8. fast enough for anyone.... <snip>
>
> I've driven two of them. Neither impressed me but I have to wonder.... if you think their
> acceleration *is* impressive why would you buy one for your teenaged daughter, teenagers not being
> widely known as particularly "light-footed" drivers?
>
> Regards, Bob Hunt
>
>

Got the3.0i, a six cylinder.

Obviously the 4.6 version is not a Corvette, nor IMNSHO, is it worth the extra $18,000.

Never have been able to understand why a driver has to go 100mph or more between stoplights, or why
a cyclist pays thousands for a super light machine and then loads it down with water bottles, a
pump, and a heavy lock...:)

HAND - Ride Safe

--
³Freedom Is a Light for Which Many Have Died in Darkness³

- Tomb of the unknown - American Revolution
 
In article <[email protected]>, [email protected] (Hunrobe) wrote:

> >"H. M. Leary" [email protected]
>
> wrote in part:
>
> >Never have been able to understand why [---snip noncycling content---] a
> cyclist pays thousands for a super light
> >machine and then loads it down with water bottles, a pump, and a heavy lock...:)
>
> That's exactly why I carry a bare minimum of stuff. A spare tube, patch kit, multitool, and an
> inflator all fit in my mini seatbag and one water bottle is plenty for the area I ride in. It's
> refillable after all. The only time I need a lock is if I'm riding with my wife and she wants to
> stop for lunch..... "You want to stop? Then *you* carry the locks." <g>
>
> Regards, Bob Hunt

WHAT????

You lock your wife up when she rides on your bike?????

...:)

--
³Freedom Is a Light for Which Many Have Died in Darkness³

- Tomb of the unknown - American Revolution
 
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