The Thread about Nothing....

Discussion in 'Australia and New Zealand' started by Hitchy, Jul 28, 2006.

  1. classic1

    classic1 Well-Known Member

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    IMG_0738.JPG

    KILL IT WITH FIRE!
     
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  2. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    I’m liking Muang Long a lot, and seem to have set up residency. I went for a walk across to an Akha village, Ban Nongkham, this morning, and ended up at their primary school, where I got permission to take a photo with my large format field camera.
    All of the kids thought the setting up was really funny, particularly when I was buried under the dark-cloth.
    Trouble was, when I went to take the photo’s, all the kids were behind me. I called out “Rong rem mai me look!” (“The School has no children!”), which they thought was hilarious, and they started chanting “Rong rem mai me look!”.
    Yesterday, Muang Long was without electricity - Possibly Lucas, Lord of Darkness?
     
  3. bbp

    bbp Well-Known Member

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    Firstly,
    Eoin, ride that cnut like you've never ridden a cnut before.Which to be honest, it seems you are doing.
    Secondly, I love you all, and I hope you all prevail in all of your potential endeavours.
    Thirdly, fuck off cunts. It's friday night and I don't believe there's any reason for me to pretend to wish you better than that.

    Hmm, nuances.
    Fuck you cnuts?
    Fuck off cnuts?

    It's a tricky business in this day and age.
     
  4. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    Yesterday arvo / evening I took a ride back out to Xiengkok, on the Mekong. I carried on up to the Laos - Myanmar Friendship Bridge. I think they may have missed an “Un-“ in the title. I found myself to be surprisingly fluent in Laos Officialdom gesticulations and body language, as they had no issue with nuances, providing both the “... you ...” and the “... off ...” versions of Beepers’ Friday night philosophical meanderings.
    The targeted hostility was amply compensated for, though, when I returned to Xiengkok, a little village on a turn in the Mekong, where the slow boats first appear after the lower rapids / canyon, on their journeys up to China. Stopping at the sleepy Immigration post, I could see the hut that my family stayed in 15 years ago, looking down the river, and the point of no return I had passed when I ignorantly set sail on my inflatable kayak one evening, not knowing that, past the corner was a canyon that offered no eddies or exits, and a water flow faster than I could hold my own against. A 10 minute paddle ended up taking me hours to fight my way back in the dark, with my wife unnecessarily reminding me of what a bloody idiot I am.
    As we had run out of Laos Kip, and there was no opportunity to get any out there, we convinced a long-tail skipper the next day to take us down the river to Houayxai, on the basis that we’d pay him once we got there. As I saw what was downstream of where I had drifted to in the kayak, I was glad I had made an exit when I could. The long-tail had to keep speed up through the rapids to maintain steerage, and had a freeboard for about 2 inches. As things progressively got worse, I told my wife to hang on to our youngest daughter, whilst I held the older one, so that if / when we went in, we wouldn’t lose them...
    Ahhhh, fond memories... and to think I am still married, and both daughters still seem to like me a little.
    The flying bugs / beetles / bombers were out in force on the ride back in the dark, pushing home one of the disadvantages of an open-face helmet. It can be surprisingly distracting when there is a beetle crawling around the inside of one’s ear, having found its evening recce flight curtailed by a motorcyclist battling from pothole to chasm, in a dusty attempt to make it back in one piece. It may be the reason why balaclavas are more prevalent than helmets...
     
  5. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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  6. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    Wild peanuts, bought from a young Akha girl at the dawn market...
    6D64B498-C475-4754-BA5C-1EC14D391B82.jpeg
     
  7. paulambry

    paulambry Well-Known Member

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    Lovin' your journal entries Eoin. Lovin' them.

    Ah yes, I know that feeling, after camping alongside the Darling one warm night while leaving my helmet propped over my rear vision mirror. A few kays down the track the next morning, I couldn't stop quick enough to tear my helmet off to eject the tribe of squirming bugs that had started to crawl across my scalp and into my ears. Blerrrr!!! Disgusting!!!! Now my helmet is the first thing to go into my tent when I setup.
     
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  8. paulambry

    paulambry Well-Known Member

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  9. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    Yesterday, I went for a ride up into the hills. As it was heading for dusk, I was thinking about turning back (Just one more turn... Just one more turn...), when I met a section where I had to stop for 2 motorbikes coming down.
    They were high school students from Muang Long, working up in the hills in the weekend. One of them wanted to practice his English - He had Avery good vocabulary, but struggled with pronunciation, as his English teacher at school couldn’t speak English.
    We decided that I’d give him a pronunciation lesson in the evening (Blind leading the blind), and headed back down the hill, together with the other two on their bike.
    Along the way, we met a rider who had broken down heading up the hill, dressed in camo, and with a homemade ‘rifle’. His spark plug was blacker than the inside of the Huntley Coal Mine Decline with the power out. Finally, the got him going, and he headed off up into the jungle. The boy then told me that that was his teacher.
    We headed back to Muang Long, and I took them down to the river to show them the drone I have with me. We attracted a large gathering of Akha women, on their way back to their villages in the hills, after a day at the markets. They were in high spirits, and pushed me more and more to fly up, down, and all around. Easy to see who wears the jodphurs in an Akha household. Once they start laughing, there’s no stopping them.
    Last night we had the English lesson on the verandah, with 5 students in attendance. It was good fun, as they all hung shite on each other as they tried to say English syllables.
    Today, I’m heading off to Muang Sing. I may go further, but I think I’d like to do some more exploring around the area.
    I’m down to 4 sheets of colour film, and a shiteload of ISO 20 B&W sheets - Great for tonal detail, but slooooooowwww as fuscia.
     
  10. bbp

    bbp Well-Known Member

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    Perhaps I should apologise for my friday language.
    A day with apprentices does wind one up.
    Perhaps one should respect others' nuances and not fucking swear,
    but swearing is somehow enjoyable to me.

    If swearing is enjoyable to me it must be worthwhile.
    Which begs the question.

    Whatever.
     
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  11. bbp

    bbp Well-Known Member

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    Alright, they're clearly unfriendly *nuts, but then the family history, jeebus, I'm surprised they let you through. It's lucky you're riding such a shit motorbike that even the Chings don't care I guess.

    That really was meant to be a joke btw.
    I'm a big fan of the free trade agreement with China, and Donald Trump, and women.
     
    #78211 bbp, Oct 20, 2019
    Last edited: Oct 20, 2019
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  12. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    I agree - I’m surprised anyone lets me in anywhere. The good thing about deportation (I’ve only been deported once) is that the deportee-Country has to allow for you to come in, before the deporter-Country can push you out. Quite nice, really.
     
  13. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    I was down at the market this morning, with the field camera. Everyone wants to look in through the lens...
    A young lad helped me pack up my tripod, which he enjoyed working out. I’ll head to the primary school tomorrow.
    The rice fields are excellent now, with their fluorescent green-gold. Harvest is under way. Yesterday I put the drone up on the way back in to Muang Sing from the border, with sun rays falling on the hills.
    After the market foray and breakfast, I rode up into the hills behind Ban Seuadaeng, until I got to 2 Akha villages - Ban Houayhoy, and Ban Houay??? (the old man who was telling me the name was all “buayed up” (PNG term for full cut on the betelnut).
    The kids in Ban Houayhoy mobbed me - True Rock Star Status - need to remember to bring Bouncers in the Roadie Crew up here.
    I stopped at the school in Ban Seuadaeng on the way back (extended concert tour) - Once you hand a GoPro over to these kids, all Hell breaks loose.
     
  14. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    Wednesday:
    After a few days riding around the hills North of Muang Sing, I headed down to Luang Namtha this morning, to decide if I wanted to ride up to Gnot Ou.
    My foobarred shoulder was making it’s importance known to me, and I just kept riding, ending up in Phayao, so only a short hop down to Lampang tomorrow.
    Had my only genuine close-call today on the Vieng Phoukka - Houayxai section, when a mad £&@)er bus driver ran me off the road as he came head-on at full noise around a right bend (turning left for him), overtaking a truck going downhill. There was a fairly healthy drop on the shoulder, and his outer tyre on his duals was over the shoulder.
    I headed bush, but managed to keep it together (Good onya, Enfield).
    I hope he grows up a little before he kills some villager or bus load of innocents.
    I also past a group of about 20 Beemers, heading North through one of the ridge villages, towards LNT. They seemed to be on a bit of a mission to get wherever they were going.
    I really like that part of Laos, from Muang Sing across to Xiangkok. Not that the Interceptor is anything less than the most capable Adventure Bike in the Known Universe, but I’d love to spend some time up there with a slightly more dirt-oriented bike.
    The Enfield handled herself well (much better than I handled her). I put her in plenty of places (and orientations) that she should not have to be in, yet she managed to stay largely upright (apart from the three times I dropped her on the track up the Mekong to Xiengkok - and those were 110% my fault).
    Next time?
    - Carry less shite: Using the large format camera was fun, but it’s cumbersome, and has an inordinate amount of paraphernalia to carry (tripod, camera, ball head, boxes of film, film holders, dark cloth, change bag, light meter, shutter cable, loupe...). I think I’ll leave it for dedicated trips. Most of the other gear got used, but could still be trimmed down a lot to only what is ‘necessary’.
    - Less moving / More exploring: I enjoyed myself most when I was based in one place, making daily unplanned forays of following my farang nose. The part where I rode all day to get from A to B, then off again next day to get from B to C, was OK, but definitely not where the value was for me. Next time I’d probably put the bike on the train up to CM (or convince the CFO that I need to get a registered dirtbike sitting in Lampang).
    - Kids: I dropped into several schools. Most I just gate-crashed and disrupted normal service, whilst one I organised to be there at knock-off time. Handing out a GoPro, and flying a drone had them in hyperdrive. They were all great fun. Next time, I think I’ll pick up some (Laos) Big Brother Mouse books for each of the schools ( http://www.bigbrothermouse.com/index.html ) - I absolutely love how seriously they take education.

    From here, it’s a little bit of time in Lampang with the Whanau, then make my way back South to KL. I think I’ll break the journey a little more on the way down.
    Once I get back, I have a bit of film-developing to do, and some vid’s to compile (I assume - I haven’t looked at them yet, so they may just be cerebral snapshots... ).

    Sunday:
    I ended up staying in Lampang until midday Saturday, getting in 3 man-whimpering Thai massage sessions at the Lampang Herb Conservation Centre to get my shoulder back in some kind of order. Yesterday arvo I rode down to Phitsanulok, foregoing continuing onto Nakhon Sawan, with the combination of fairly high ambient temperature, and a massage-depleted bod limiting sensible progress.
    Hopefully I can get South of Bangkok today, allowing me to split the remainder of the return journey into shorter hops than on the way up.
     
  15. classic1

    classic1 Well-Known Member

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    DPF. Ivan Milat.

    One of the greats. Gone but not forgotten. A nation mourns.


    4D239AD6-ED8B-4DCA-A7A3-3A6729F38244.jpeg
     
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  16. EoinC2

    EoinC2 Well-Known Member

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    Made it down to Hua Hin today. I was doing my best to avoid Bangkok, but my best wasn’t good enough. I missed a turn and ended up buried in the motorbike horror for over an hour, trying to escape. Twice I had to ride the wrong way down entry ramps to toll-ways (mega no-no for motorbikes).
    I ended up getting frustrated and riding on the motorways (mega no-no for motorbikes, but not as mega as the toll-ways).
    At one stage, a sudden dose of the shitz caught up with me, as I searched desperately for an off-ramp. I finally made it to a petrol station, with my legs and toes crossed, and the only 2 dunnies already had happy customers ensconced.
    As one finally made his exit, I pushed past him, fumbled with a belt that stubbornly resisted release, and took general aim at the squat. Fortunately, as half my body weights purged itself, there was a grab rail for disabled / elderly, that became my anchor to the World.
    I stayed there until there was not a skerick of fecal matter remaining in this mortal shell, not giving a flying foobarr about any other unfortunate who may have been waiting for similar purging.
    All in, though, I’m feeling great, and eating well (especially during time with the whanau in Lampang). The odd bowelic-erruption is more like a rapid detox than any health issue.
    Not sure yet what path I’ll follow South, but I’ll stick around Hua Hin tomorrow, to celebrate my Escape from Bangkok.
     
  17. 62vette

    62vette Well-Known Member

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    Wash that motorbike Eoin, it's a disgrace. It may be that yer undies need a good laundering too :eek:

    Good reportage of your travels
     
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  18. paulambry

    paulambry Well-Known Member

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    Super ace postages Eion.

    Amen on Ivan Classo. But a DPF for us. Epic DPF.
     
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  19. bbp

    bbp Well-Known Member

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    I'm replying to myself, which I've bitched about other people doing, but Whatever.
    Dirty was here again a week or so ago, and I was was talking about going out to a gig I'd been invited to, but knowing how good a a cook he is, I was hedging my bets;
    and I said 'oh maybe let's not go out. Which begs the question, what's for dinner? '
    I was summarily educated on my poor form. That's not the correct usage of the term. And I asked for an explanation of the correct usage of the term 'beg the question'. And it took a bit of googling until I understood that when a moron can't support his premise, one should say 'that begs the question' and naught else. But now I know.
    Granted he was wearing his 'Ive got a PhD' tshirt. With an asterisk. #prettyhugedick
    Um if you say so. Almost begs a question, really.
    He does has a PhD though.

    And aren't I regretting using a hashtag right now?
    (there's nothing to click btw)
     
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  20. bbp

    bbp Well-Known Member

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    Ambry was hereabouts this evening too, which was loverly, but I was in a bitching and moaning about my RTO employment mode, and was not on my best form, but it was loverly to catch up with a good sir.
    Best wishes to all of you good sirs, and lady too.
    Fuck, I made that sound much gheyer than it was. I should call Jono.

    I did. Cnut wouldn't answer at 12.45am. Ghey.
     
    #78220 bbp, Oct 29, 2019
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2019
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