too good to be true!

Discussion in 'The Bike Cafe' started by less'go, Sep 16, 2004.

  1. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    Juice is certainly on the way up here to. around AU $1.25 litre which tranlates to about $4.55 per gal in your currency. Good thing is the bicycle doesn't use a lot.

    I often wonder when people with older cars fill up, are they over capitalising?

    I think the situation down in New Orleans looks pretty grim at the moment and it will probably get tougher for the folk down that way for a while yet.

    When thinngs get seriously difficult, we can always go back to making our own. The poor folk down the Mississipi can't even get decent water to make it at the moment.

    Kind regards,
     


  2. jhuskey

    jhuskey Moderator

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    It's going to be reported much worse in the next few days I fear. I know that they don't have a good idea of what the death toll and damage is yet.
    A shame we get so spoiled on our comforts and complacency.
     
  3. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    I hope it gets better sooner rather than later.

    Kind regards,
     
  4. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    It seems that things have not been as severe as I thought it could have been. I notice that they found the Australian bloke who was missing. Seemed he was locked up for refusing to leave a hotel!! Must have been either very pissed or very thirsty.

    If we ever have a disaster impending like that in St Sara's we'll evacuate the beer wine spirits and barmaids; The drunks won't be able to resist following. :D

    Kind regards,
     
  5. jhuskey

    jhuskey Moderator

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    Well take what you hear from the media and shit can it ,there will be many stories of total destruction from Mississippi.
    New Orleans was just a good racial story so they centeed there.
    I expect to hear more in a couple of days when a couple of my EMT's get back
    They are pulling out most of the civilian teams and bringing more military.
    I will hit the news shortly I suspect.
    As far as St.Sara's we will only locate well out of harms way,did you hear that the French Quarter is still intact for the most part.
    The bars survived.
    Gil, I attended another party Sat. night. You should have seen the 21 year old little ladie that bared her rear. She bragged she had a pretty one and I challenged her and she proved her statement.
    She is on the top of the invitee list now. I was way too enthralled to think of a photo at the time .Maybe next time.
     
  6. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    Sad to have missed it. You know I don't ever remember seeing a sight of that sort from a woman that repulsed me. Presumably, it takes great discernment to differentiate a truely beautiful one from the less aesthetic ones. It is a skill that I have not yet honed.

    By the way, just for the record, from a CONNOSOIR was it of the very beautiful classification or of the less aesthetically pleasant category. :D

    They all look brilliantly attractive to me, that's naturally leaving aside those ones with the plums hanging. They're the ones that I always envisiage when people say someone is "Butt Ugly".

    Kind regards,
     
  7. jhuskey

    jhuskey Moderator

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    This was a work of art and even the other ladies agreed so. If it had a frame it would be suitable for hanging on the wall,although that would be a waste of good material.
    I'll see if I can find you her photo fully clothed,unfortunately you will need to use your imagination for the rest until the next party anyway.
    I would think this would be a good form of identification in our bar-topia.
    All ladies must bear there wares for ID.
     
  8. EoinC

    EoinC New Member

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    I'll go as Doorman...
     
  9. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    You have given me a brilliant idea which would be a new take on the old glad wrap the dunny seat trick.

    Many years ago, it used to be a good joke to cover the toilet pan with cling wrap and remove the light bulb or put a low power globe in the lamp, at parties so that when the woman sat down to go about disposing of their excess water they would end up with a wet backside. By doing this one could show compassion by allowing them to have a shower etc.

    What we could do, at St Sara's, is to do a similar job but have the ladies powder themselves up and sit on the cling wrap thus making an imprint which could be projected or scanned as necessary. This would allow for ready identification much as finger printing does for the police.

    The logical extension would be to use the recognition technology now available so that access to buildings an the like could be easily gained merely by the ladies baring ther backsides to a camera of some sort. Do you think it has possibilities? :D

    Kind regards,
     
  10. EoinC

    EoinC New Member

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    I also work as a mobile scanning device. Looks like there's plenty of employment opportunities for me...
     
  11. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    EoinC,

    That's great, Huskey and I will be relying on you to keep out the people whose scanned images have suspect round shapes on the imprints. :D

    Kind regards
     
  12. EoinC

    EoinC New Member

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    Sorry, Lah! My scanning hardware is susceptible to damage whenever excessive quantities of external genitalia are present. There's a lot of money tied up in this apparatus and we don't want it to break. You'll have to conduct a pre-scanning cull with the gloved hand method before passing the confirmed on for detailed image analysis.
     
  13. jhuskey

    jhuskey Moderator

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    Ladies wrapped in Saran Wrap. That's worth looking into! Get it! "Looking into".
     
  14. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    Yeah, got it; Had to think about it for a while, but then the light wasn't that good and there was no spot light handy. :D

    Nice of EoinC to volunteer to scan the clientel for us but it seems that he needs some training. It would be an uneconomic burden on the folk of St Sara's to to have duplication of the scanning at the entry points to the attractions, so I think we will have to have him retrained so that he can separate the blokes from the lasses.

    Kind regards,
     
  15. jhuskey

    jhuskey Moderator

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    Yes a shame it is that hard to differentiate these days. What type of litmus test do you recommend.
     
  16. jhuskey

    jhuskey Moderator

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    Yes a shame it is that hard to differentiate these days. What type of litmus test do you recommend?
     
  17. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    Huskey,

    My father used to reckon the victory test was the go. You make a V with your first and second fingers and go the grope. If one finger bends over the merchandise is not up to scratch. :D

    Kind regards,
     
  18. EoinC

    EoinC New Member

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    My abilities in differentiation are in line with current standards (at least as far as I am willing to admit to). However, I must stick to my job description of Portal Scanner as I may have an allergy to latex gloves (and Duty of Care would dictate :D that such precautions must be used in the initial culling process). Unfortunately, as mentioned before, my full-page scanning equipment is adversely affected by the presence of external genitalia in the region of the scanning surfaces. I'm sure you fella's will do a wonderful job of seperating the rams from the ewes. I shall follow up with ID'ing those who pass your litmus test.
     
  19. James Bruce Gil

    James Bruce Gil New Member

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    EoinC,

    Sheep in general aren't the problem we are trying to come to terms with. Its the weathers masqueurading as ewes that are the significant problem. So far as I have observed they don't have external genetalia and that is why we need to get you all trained up. :D

    Huskey and I can pick a fully fledged Ram a mile away, so you won't have to scan the daggy ends of then at least.

    Kind regards,
     
  20. EoinC

    EoinC New Member

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    I'm rather worried about you and JH keeping a wether :D eye out for the rams, although each to their own I guess. When it comes to the transheepuals, they fit into 2 categories - Those who have been cut and those who have not. The yet-to-be-cut ones will be easily picked up by your initial gloved inspection. The already-cut bring us to another technical problem - the scanner's software can go haywire when the scanning surfaces encounter scar tissue. This requires a re-boot and re-entering of the algorithms (lost production time). My scanning equipment is very accurate in reconciling ID's of items within the bounds of the target group. The algorithms provide incredible detail in assimilating qualities of each specimen, but we need some basic pre-filtering selection on the subjects. It's really not too much to ask that you and JH arrange pre-clearance so that I can focus on rapid processing of those who have fulfilled the basic prerequisites. I can readily identify club members (after you have established that they never had a member), guests and guests who should be invited to become members. This will be particularly important when you start throwing those member-only nights.
    You sorting the chaff from the hay will allow me to concentrate on ensuring that we live up to our claims of being ISO-9002-accredited.
     
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