S
Simon Mason
Guest
Following on from the alcoholics thread, a great true story just sprung to
mind. Going to a very strict Catholic school meant that a lot of my mates
were tee total (as opposed to the nuns and priests who stank of the stuff).
This was great when we left school and passed our driving tests and went
around all the country pubs. I had a pal that would happily drive his 4
mates (me included) around and we would keep him in ginger ale, or whatever
stuff he was on for the night. Perfect symbiosis.
In 1987, we went out for a few jars around the place and he was driving us
home at around 2330. Blue light appears in mirror and Plod pulls us over. My
mate opens the window and the copper's eyes light up as a cloud of booze
envelops his head. He gets all excited about a major collar on his patch,
but first he has to go through all the formalities.
"Have you been drinking"? he says to my mate.
"Yes" he says.
And when was your last drink?
Comic pause.
"1976" !
(he had had sherry at a christening or something when his guardian angel was
distracted)
HAHAHA
On a similar note a Catholic colleague ate a bacon sarnie on Good Friday
morning shift. When I pointed this out he looked at me in horror, until he
relaxed and said "It's OK - no one will know".
--
Simon M.
mind. Going to a very strict Catholic school meant that a lot of my mates
were tee total (as opposed to the nuns and priests who stank of the stuff).
This was great when we left school and passed our driving tests and went
around all the country pubs. I had a pal that would happily drive his 4
mates (me included) around and we would keep him in ginger ale, or whatever
stuff he was on for the night. Perfect symbiosis.
In 1987, we went out for a few jars around the place and he was driving us
home at around 2330. Blue light appears in mirror and Plod pulls us over. My
mate opens the window and the copper's eyes light up as a cloud of booze
envelops his head. He gets all excited about a major collar on his patch,
but first he has to go through all the formalities.
"Have you been drinking"? he says to my mate.
"Yes" he says.
And when was your last drink?
Comic pause.
"1976" !
(he had had sherry at a christening or something when his guardian angel was
distracted)
HAHAHA
On a similar note a Catholic colleague ate a bacon sarnie on Good Friday
morning shift. When I pointed this out he looked at me in horror, until he
relaxed and said "It's OK - no one will know".
--
Simon M.