General fitness, health and nutrition · Public discussion

yoar Periods and how to avoid Them

Started by The14thdisciple · · Last activity · 3 posts · 1,438 views

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General fitness, health and nutrition
Published
30 May 2004
Last activity
30 May 2004
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The14thdisciple
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  1. Paul Whiting ([email hidden]) asked the14thdisciple:
    "My girlfriend is cranky. She's unreasonable, selfish and
    spiteful and blames her menstural cycle for her constant
    mood swings. Can you give me any advice as to the best way
    of handling her?" Paul, Singapore

    a Period is Not somthing you Want to dwell upon, i Can
    assure you Paun, but it Was once beleafed that 'the Currs'
    was givened By god to Wommen in revenge, for as the Jeasus
    lay hanging on the cross didst Not the Lesbien Roman Gards
    stab him in The vagina? ye, this wouldst be justyfication
    enouff, for our God Is a vengeful God and will Not hath
    women messing with his Kids.

    but The trueth is much simpler than That, and Invoalveth NOT
    revenge; The periods Are simpley gods Way of pundishing men
    For not keeping thear wimmen preggernent enouff. wommen
    Crave the condition of preggernancy and it Is a mans duty to
    insure that even if she is NOT preggernent she is At least
    trying . and besides, Paol, if He dident Want you to use
    Yoar god-Givened-Peaness then he wouldst Not have given you
    1 in the fist place .

    a Large industry Has grown up as A result of the 'mothly'
    witch sells towels and intearnel Devices all Aimed at
    protecting socierty From the unhigeanic act of bleeding from
    the genetalias. this has fortunately kept our swimming pools
    and Rivers clean for thousends of years Now but - as It is
    with the Oh Zoan Liar - thease simply Mask the simptoms and
    Hide the fact that only a constently full and Bountyful
    woomb can keep a womman off the drip .

    althoaugh This doth Not so far ansewer Yoar queston, Pale,
    it Is impotent to have some background infermaition So as
    You can beter unnerstand What yoar girfreing is going thrue
    Evertime she is having her Mendelsohn Cycle (clever readers
    wiil Have seen my litle 'Mendelsohn' Joak there! thank You,
    The loard, for filling my Head with so much whit!!)

    a Wombans Body is disigned to carry on bleeding well into
    middel age or until It is replaiced by the Mentalpause, and
    in both cases. the Only effective treatments are chocolates,
    deodourant and distance.

    you Shouldst Try and make yoar girfriend aware that she
    Shouldst be grateful to the Farter for his Gennerosity in
    giving her Moare blood than she actuelly needs ! i Am sure
    thear are wommen throuout the World who wouldst giveth thear
    Right Arm for that much blood, (eaven though the prosess
    would be futile as Without a Right Arm it would just Spill
    out from the shoulder) and stress Upon her the impotancy of
    Riteous Procreatian (as apposed to Gratuitus Fornicaition
    witch is ALWAYS a temptation wheneaver wombmen is involved)
    . above All, Encurrage her to spend moar time gestating.

    but I can NOT tell you no moar about periods rite now as i
    Have to deliver a consignment Of padded-hammocks to the
    local Weightwatchers club.Goodness knows why they Would
    want them ....

    loaf Form yoar old freand 14 Little Boxes Nursing Home
    "Caring for the wants and needs of the needy and the wanty"
    littleboxes.nllittleboxes.nl

  2. Thank you sooooooooooooooooo much for this. Screaming with
    laughter. Hope you're publishing this stuff ;-)

    the14thdisciple said:

    Paul Whiting ([email hidden]) asked the14thdisciple:
    "My girlfriend is cranky. She's unreasonable, selfish and
    spiteful and blames her menstural cycle for her constant
    mood swings. Can you give me any advice as to the best way
    of handling her?" Paul, Singapore

    a Period is Not somthing you Want to dwell upon, i Can
    assure you Paun, but it Was once beleafed that 'the Currs'
    was givened By god to Wommen in revenge, for as the Jeasus
    lay hanging on the cross didst Not the Lesbien Roman Gards
    stab him in The vagina? ye, this wouldst be justyfication
    enouff, for our God Is a vengeful God and will Not hath
    women messing with his Kids.

    but The trueth is much simpler than That, and Invoalveth
    NOT revenge; The periods Are simpley gods Way of
    pundishing men For not keeping thear wimmen preggernent
    enouff. wommen Crave the condition of preggernancy and it
    Is a mans duty to insure that even if she is NOT
    preggernent she is At least trying . and besides, Paol, if
    He dident Want you to use Yoar god-Givened-Peaness then he
    wouldst Not have given you 1 in the fist place .

    a Large industry Has grown up as A result of the 'mothly'
    witch sells towels and intearnel Devices all Aimed at
    protecting socierty From the unhigeanic act of bleeding
    from the genetalias. this has fortunately kept our
    swimming pools and Rivers clean for thousends of years Now
    but - as It is with the Oh Zoan Liar - thease simply Mask
    the simptoms and Hide the fact that only a constently full
    and Bountyful woomb can keep a womman off the drip .

    althoaugh This doth Not so far ansewer Yoar queston,
    Pale, it Is impotent to have some background infermaition
    So as You can beter unnerstand What yoar girfreing is
    going thrue Evertime she is having her Mendelsohn Cycle
    (clever readers wiil Have seen my litle 'Mendelsohn' Joak
    there! thank You, The loard, for filling my Head with so
    much whit!!)

    a Wombans Body is disigned to carry on bleeding well into
    middel age or until It is replaiced by the Mentalpause,
    and in both cases. the Only effective treatments are
    chocolates, deodourant and distance.

    you Shouldst Try and make yoar girfriend aware that she
    Shouldst be grateful to the Farter for his Gennerosity in
    giving her Moare blood than she actuelly needs ! i Am sure
    thear are wommen throuout the World who wouldst giveth
    thear Right Arm for that much blood, (eaven though the
    prosess would be futile as Without a Right Arm it would
    just Spill out from the shoulder) and stress Upon her the
    impotancy of Riteous Procreatian (as apposed to Gratuitus
    Fornicaition witch is ALWAYS a temptation wheneaver
    wombmen is involved) . above All, Encurrage her to spend
    moar time gestating.

    but I can NOT tell you no moar about periods rite now as i
    Have to deliver a consignment Of padded-hammocks to the
    local Weightwatchers club.Goodness knows why they Would
    want them ....

    loaf Form yoar old freand 14 Little Boxes Nursing Home
    "Caring for the wants and needs of the needy and the
    wanty" littleboxes.nllittleboxes.nl

  3. the14thdisciple" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
    "(clever readers wiil Have seen my litle 'Mendelsohn' Joak
    there! thank You, The loard, for filling my Head with so
    much whit!!)"

    So much [censored], don't you mean, [censored]?

    ASSPANDA

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