You ain't getting any

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by cyberlegend1994, Aug 22, 2006.

  1. cyberlegend1994

    cyberlegend1994 Moderator

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    One day, a little boy was on a farm when he said, "Mom, can I have breakfast?" She said, "Not until you do your chores." So the boy is a little mad, and he goes to the chicken coop to feed the chickens, and kicks a chicken. He then goes to the pig pen to feed the pigs, and kicks a pig. He then goes to the barn to milk the cows, and kicks a cow. He goes back to the house for breakfast and all he sees is dry cereal and an apple. The boy said, "What gives?" His mom said, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you aren't getting any eggs. I saw you kick a pig, so you don't get any bacon. I saw you kick a cow, so you aren't getting any milk." Then the boy's dad gets up and kicks the cat. The boy said, "Mom, are you going to tell him, or will I?"
     
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  2. mopar

    mopar New Member

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    I don't like Chinese food, I own a few. I do like fortune cookies.
     
  3. ebojorq

    ebojorq New Member

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    I think the li'l boy meant something else... don't you??
     
  4. mopar

    mopar New Member

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    Meh, I get the joke now...:rolleyes: After reading it again!
     
  5. lance99

    lance99 New Member

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    Potentially and Realistically
    > A young boy went up to his father and asked him, 'Dad, what is the
    > difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?'
    >
    > The father thought for a moment, then answered, 'Go ask your mother if she
    > would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars.
    >
    > Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million
    > dollars, and then ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a
    > million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that.'
    >
    > So the boy went to his mother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for
    > a million dollars?'
    >
    > The mother replied, 'Of course I would! We could really use that money to
    > fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!'
    >
    > The boy then went to his sister and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt
    > for a million dollars?'
    >
    > The girl replied, 'Oh my Gawd! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a
    > heartbeat, are you nuts?'
    >
    > The boy then went to his brother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt
    > for a million dollars?'
    >
    > 'Of course,' the brother replied. 'Do you know what a million bucks would
    > buy?'
    >
    > The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad.
    >
    > His father asked him, 'Did you find out the difference between 'potentially'
    > and 'realistically'?'
    >
    > The boy replied, 'Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million
    > dollars .
    >
    > But 'realistically', we're living with two hookers and a homo
     
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