You can't just wash that asbestos right out of your bed



M

Marc Lermin

Guest
You see, it tangles in with other fibers and breaks off into the air gradually! It even stays
intertwined with your body hair. Think of that next time you lean on a plaster wall. Yes, that
quaint "plaster and lathe" you thought was superior to sheetrock is 30% asbestos if it was made or
patched between 1920 and 1980! Ah, the glories of the affectation of being urban vermin! And you
like playing with the bottom of your shoes while you talk on the phone at work? Just after you
walked all over that white construction debris on the sidwalk? You got it, dude! 30% asbestos! All
over your belongings so you can pass it on to your grandchildren as well! Hey, isn't historic
preservation just grand! Let's preserve all the toxic stuff to pas son to our grandchildren so we
can say we so nobly resisted urban "sprawl"! Don't tear those toxic antiquities down! We want to
keep on breathing them! Isn't urban affectation, grand! But then again, if you're reading this, you
don't know, because urban luddites hate the internet because it keeps them from experiencing the
stimulation of urban cockaroach life! And speaking of cockaroaches and pidgeons and rodents, your
smaller fellow urban vermin (that you inevitably eat), they make nesting material from asbestos and
spread it all over. Yes, you do eat them - they are everywhere in your beloved sprawl-less city! And
when your office moved, did you see the debris-strwen sidewalk they parked your files on?



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They used to put asbestos in: bakelite, plaster of Paris, sheetrock joints, ceiling "sand" paint,
foot-callous pumice, wall shingles, floor tiles, pipe insulation, skyscraper ceiling insulation,
floortile (black-tar-like) "mastic" (even under ceramic bath tiles), and roofing shingles. They
spread it with "don't ask, don't tell" electricians and dust-covered workers on your busses and
dumpster leftovers on your sidewalk.

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