Whew, so I went on a few club rides, and here are some of the perennial
characters I've met:
The Hallway Monitor -- he likes telling pedestrians to stay off the
bike lane, likes telling passing bicyclists they should wear their
helmets, likes telling fellow riders not to get ahead of the point man.
Sometimes tells off motorists, too, about the environment.
The Fat Guy in A Rubber Suit -- old, sagging, wrapped in spandex and a
jersey like a supermarket turkey at Thanksgiving. Even wears
sunglasses on a cloudy day!
The Careful Old Lady -- rides real slow and proper, with mirrors on
each end of her handlebars. Very pleasant personality, usually a widow
or divorcee.
The Single Woman -- not fugly, but she's already in her thirties and
you do wonder why people recommend meeting women this way!
The Raconteur -- is this a bike ride or an airplane trip?!?! Good God,
get me some marshmellows and start a campfire!
The Loner -- somebody always shows up who basically sticks to himself.
Hmmm.
The Advisor -- someone always likes to point out every little thing on
the road, from potholes to glass to roadkill. Does anyone look
anymore, or is this the Special Olympics ride?
None of this is not a complaint, mind you. The only real complaint I
have -- aside from the asinine insistence on helmets, no matter that
they're worn improperly over half the time -- is the point-drop-sweep
system. It feels like those who "keep up" are "penalized," while the
slow pokes who are forever behind never have to serve. After a while,
the group really stretches out, up to ten minutes between the point and
the sweep!