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My mom has just been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer - need help urgently!!

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General fitness, health and nutrition
Published
14 April 2004
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21 April 2004
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fenix
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  1. My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced unresectable
    pancreatic cancer. It appears that the cancer has not spread
    yet to other organs, but the doctors give her very little
    time to live.

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or alternative,that
    would offer us at least some hope.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    Peter [email hidden]

  2. Quoted message said:

    My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced unresectable
    pancreatic cancer. It appears that the cancer has not
    spread yet to other organs, but the doctors give her very
    little time to live.

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or alternative,that
    would offer us at least some hope.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    I sincerely hope she beats this, but the help I would offer
    you is to advise you and your family to talk about what her
    doctors have told you. They have painted a gloomy picture,
    and unfortunately they're usually right.

    Deal with that picture. What can you do, as her family, to
    make the best of what she has?

    I'm not saying don't search for miracles or hope. I'm saying
    don't forget her stark reality in your search for them. Pay
    attention to the possibility that there won't be a miracle
    and plan for it. The odds of you finding a miracle are slim,
    but the odds of you making a huge difference in her life are
    very good. Based on some experience, some of it personal,
    that is where I would advise you to spend your time and
    energies. Spend the time on HER, not on medicine.

    I know this isn't what you were looking for, but it's heart-
    felt advice. My best to her.

  3. Quoted message said:

    My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced unresectable
    pancreatic cancer. It appears that the cancer has not
    spread yet to other organs, but the doctors give her very
    little time to live.

    The prognosis for pancreatic cancer is extremely poor. Long-
    term overall survival rates are less than two percent. Even
    with very localized tumors, four out of five patients are
    dead within five years.

    Quoted message said:

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or alternative,that
    would offer us at least some hope.

    You can consult other specialists to see what is possible,
    but the outlook is quite grim, as a general rule, and it may
    be best to prepare for the worst. Mortality is very high,
    and most patients are in pain in the latter stages of the
    disease and require lots of medication.

    --
    Transpose hotmail and mxsmanic in my e-mail address to reach
    me directly.

  4. Carey Gregory said:
    Quoted message said:

    My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced unresectable
    pancreatic cancer. It appears that the cancer has not
    spread yet to other organs, but the doctors give her very
    little time to live.

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or alternative,that
    would offer us at least some hope.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    I sincerely hope she beats this, but the help I would
    offer you is to advise you and your family to talk about
    what her doctors have told you. They have painted a gloomy
    picture, and unfortunately they're usually right.

    Deal with that picture. What can you do, as her family, to
    make the best of what she has?

    I'm not saying don't search for miracles or hope. I'm
    saying don't forget her stark reality in your search for
    them. Pay attention to the possibility that there won't be
    a miracle and plan for it. The odds of you finding a
    miracle are slim, but the odds of you making a huge
    difference in her life are very good. Based on some
    experience, some of it personal, that is where I would
    advise you to spend your time and energies. Spend the time
    on HER, not on medicine.

    I know this isn't what you were looking for, but it's heart-
    felt advice. My best to her.

    I couldn't agree more. What you don't want to do is
    to put the patient through more trauma for the
    benefit of the desperate loved ones. My mom died of
    pancreatic cancer in 1987. I've heard of trying to
    resect pancreatic cancer, even looked into a Whipple
    procedure. A good friend who is a physician gently
    acted as my advocate and filtered the information I
    was too personally involved in to act impartially
    on. We actually were considering chemotherapy, but
    she died before we could start, and it was probably
    a mercy that she did. We had to scream at the
    hospital a few times because they were too concerned
    about turning her into a narcotic addict at the end,
    but by and large her suffering was managed well. My
    heart goes out to you and your family.

    Steve

  5. My only warning is to make sure this isn't a diagnosis based
    upon a CT-scan or MRI... We are assuming that someone has
    actually biopsied (obtained a sample) of the pancreas or
    biliary drainage system and that a competent pathologist has
    interpreted it. Cancer -- despite what some physicians will
    say -- can't be diagnosed from an x-ray.

    My only 2nd (smaller) piece of advice is that if the
    diagnosis is correct, and your mom is at a community-based
    hospital, make sure she is under the care of an experienced,
    compassionate oncologist. This will make a huge difference
    in her comfort level with regard to pain management. Some
    patients can benefit from stenting of the biliary tree --
    placement of small tubes in the event her liver isn't
    draining bile appropriately -- this isn't always feasible or
    reasonable; it depends upon the particular patient. I'm not
    suggesting your put her on a plane to the Mayo clinic or
    massachusetts general hospital -- not at all. What I am
    saying is that if there is any doubt as to the ability of
    your local physicians to care for her -- and that doesn't
    mean necessarily repeating or doing more tests and
    procedures, it means being knowledgeable about
    palliative/hospice care, pain management, and things to make
    her as comfortable as possible -- then consider having her
    seen at a larger institution/medical center. Maybe she would
    benefit from a trial of chemotherapy. There's no way to know
    over the internet.

    You can make sure she is getting good medical care, but from
    that point on, you should spend as much quality time with
    her as possible. best wishes.

    "Carey Gregory" <[email hidden]> wrote in
    message "]news:[email hidden]...

    Quoted message said:
    Quoted message said:

    My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced unresectable
    pancreatic cancer. It appears that the cancer has not
    spread yet to other organs, but the doctors give her very
    little time to live.

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or
    alternative,that would offer us at least some hope.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    I sincerely hope she beats this, but the help I would
    offer you is to


    advise

    Quoted message said:

    you and your family to talk about what her doctors have
    told you. They


    have

    Quoted message said:

    painted a gloomy picture, and unfortunately they're
    usually right.

    Deal with that picture. What can you do, as her family, to
    make the best


    of

    Quoted message said:

    what she has?

    I'm not saying don't search for miracles or hope. I'm
    saying don't forget her stark reality in your search for
    them. Pay attention to the possibility that there won't be
    a miracle and plan for it. The odds of


    you

    Quoted message said:

    finding a miracle are slim, but the odds of you making a
    huge difference


    in

    Quoted message said:

    her life are very good. Based on some experience, some of
    it personal,


    that

    Quoted message said:

    is where I would advise you to spend your time and
    energies. Spend the


    time

    Quoted message said:

    on HER, not on medicine.

    I know this isn't what you were looking for, but it's heart-
    felt advice.


    My

    Quoted message said:

    best to her.

  6. My heart goes out to you. I lost my dad to stomach
    cancer. I hate when doctors play God, and tell you how
    much time someone has to live. They told my mom my dad
    had 6 months, and she promptly responded to the doctor;
    do you know how much time YOU have to live? Unfortunately
    they were right though.

    All doctors know is how much time people with a certain
    condition generally have. No one really knows how much time
    your mom has but God. As long as she's alive, there is
    always hope. You might want to try this site for clinical
    trials of new treatments for your mom in your area.

    cancer.govclinical trials

    You might also want to try the <A HREF="aol://5863:126/alt.-
    support.cancer">alt.support.cancer</A> newsgroup, and also
    search Google for other support groups.

    << My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced unresectable
    pancreatic cancer. It appears that the cancer has not spread
    yet to other organs, but the doctors give her very little
    time to live.

  7. (Sheellah) said:

    My heart goes out to you. I lost my dad to stomach
    cancer. I hate when doctors play God, and tell you how
    much time someone has to live. They told my mom my dad
    had 6 months, and she promptly responded to the doctor;
    do you know how much time YOU have to live? Unfortunately
    they were right though.

    What would you have them say when asked? Would you have
    them say "only God knows?" Would you have them lie? Would
    you have them refuse to answer? How is a person to conduct
    their life and make decisions if they don't know the
    *probable* outcome?

  8. Carey Gregory said:
    (Sheellah) said:

    My heart goes out to you. I lost my dad to stomach
    cancer. I hate when doctors play God, and tell you how
    much time someone has to live. They told my mom my dad
    had 6 months, and she promptly responded to the doctor;
    do you know how much time YOU have to live? Unfortunately
    they were right though.

    What would you have them say when asked? Would you have
    them say "only God knows?" Would you have them lie? Would
    you have them refuse to answer? How is a person to conduct
    their life and make decisions if they don't know the
    *probable* outcome?

    But it matters _how_ the info is given -- and heard. Doc
    might have explained what you just said, about probable
    outcome. OTOH, sounds like Sheellah heard "He will live
    6 months."

    bob

  9. Bob said:

    But it matters _how_ the info is given -- and heard. Doc
    might have explained what you just said, about probable
    outcome.

    When the news is really bad, it's going to hurt no matter
    how it is said. It's usually best to be quick and simple:
    "She probably has about six months to live," or the like.

    --
    Transpose hotmail and mxsmanic in my e-mail address to reach
    me directly.

  10. In article <[email hidden]>,

    Mxsmanic said:
    Bob said:

    But it matters _how_ the info is given -- and heard. Doc
    might have explained what you just said, about probable
    outcome.

    When the news is really bad, it's going to hurt no matter
    how it is said. It's usually best to be quick and simple:
    "She probably has about six months to live," or the like.

    My father's doctors told him to "go home and prepare to die;
    we can't do anything for you" when his bone cancer of the
    spine was finally diagnosed. This was ten years ago; perhaps
    attitudes have changed now.

    --
    "Did Father shoot him? I will eat Grandfather for dinner."
    - Helen Keller, on learning of the death of her grandfather

  11. REP said:

    My father's doctors told him to "go home and prepare to
    die; we can't do anything for you" when his bone cancer of
    the spine was finally diagnosed. This was ten years ago;
    perhaps attitudes have changed now.

    Did he die? If so, how long after diagnosis?

    Remember that doctors don't like to tell people that they
    are going to die; it's equivalent to telling them that they
    are incompetent. Nobody likes being helpless, least of all
    physicians who have spent years training to keep people
    healthy and alive. Even when death is inevitable and beyond
    the reach of medical science, many doctors feel personally
    frustrated by cases that cannot be helped. Sometimes this
    exasperation may transpire in their bedside manner.

    --
    Transpose hotmail and mxsmanic in my e-mail address to reach
    me directly.

  12. "REP" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
    "]news:[email hidden]...

    Quoted message said:


    My father's doctors told him to "go home and prepare to
    die; we can't do anything for you" when his bone cancer of
    the spine was finally diagnosed. This was ten years ago;
    perhaps attitudes have changed now.

    Is that *really* in quotes? come on, now.

  13. Steven Bornfeld <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:<[email hidden]>...

    Quoted message said:
    Carey Gregory said:
    Quoted message said:

    My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced
    unresectable pancreatic cancer. It appears that the
    cancer has not spread yet to other organs, but the
    doctors give her very little time to live.

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or
    alternative,that would offer us at least some hope.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    I sincerely hope she beats this, but the help I would
    offer you is to advise you and your family to talk about
    what her doctors have told you. They have painted a
    gloomy picture, and unfortunately they're usually right.

    Deal with that picture. What can you do, as her family,
    to make the best of what she has?

    I'm not saying don't search for miracles or hope. I'm
    saying don't forget her stark reality in your search for
    them. Pay attention to the possibility that there won't
    be a miracle and plan for it. The odds of you finding a
    miracle are slim, but the odds of you making a huge
    difference in her life are very good. Based on some
    experience, some of it personal, that is where I would
    advise you to spend your time and energies. Spend the
    time on HER, not on medicine.

    I know this isn't what you were looking for, but it's
    heart-felt advice. My best to her.

    I couldn't agree more. What you don't want to do is
    to put the patient through more trauma for the
    benefit of the desperate loved ones. My mom died of
    pancreatic cancer in 1987. I've heard of trying to
    resect pancreatic cancer, even looked into a Whipple
    procedure. A good friend who is a physician gently
    acted as my advocate and filtered the information I
    was too personally involved in to act impartially
    on. We actually were considering chemotherapy, but
    she died before we could start, and it was probably
    a mercy that she did. We had to scream at the
    hospital a few times because they were too concerned
    about turning her into a narcotic addict at the end,

    If I were in her situation, I'd rather become narcotic
    addict than endure pain.

    Quoted message said:

    but by and large her suffering was managed well. My heart
    goes out to you and your family.

    Steve

  14. Steven Bornfeld <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:<[email hidden]>...

    Quoted message said:
    Carey Gregory said:
    Quoted message said:

    My mom has just been diagnosed with advanced
    unresectable pancreatic cancer. It appears that the
    cancer has not spread yet to other organs, but the
    doctors give her very little time to live.

    I am desperately trying to find info regarding any
    available treatment, whether medical or
    alternative,that would offer us at least some hope.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    I sincerely hope she beats this, but the help I would
    offer you is to advise you and your family to talk about
    what her doctors have told you. They have painted a
    gloomy picture, and unfortunately they're usually right.

    Deal with that picture. What can you do, as her family,
    to make the best of what she has?

    I'm not saying don't search for miracles or hope. I'm
    saying don't forget her stark reality in your search for
    them. Pay attention to the possibility that there won't
    be a miracle and plan for it. The odds of you finding a
    miracle are slim, but the odds of you making a huge
    difference in her life are very good. Based on some
    experience, some of it personal, that is where I would
    advise you to spend your time and energies. Spend the
    time on HER, not on medicine.

    I know this isn't what you were looking for, but it's
    heart-felt advice. My best to her.

    I couldn't agree more. What you don't want to do is
    to put the patient through more trauma for the
    benefit of the desperate loved ones. My mom died of
    pancreatic cancer in 1987. I've heard of trying to
    resect pancreatic cancer, even looked into a Whipple
    procedure. A good friend who is a physician gently
    acted as my advocate and filtered the information I
    was too personally involved in to act impartially
    on. We actually were considering chemotherapy, but
    she died before we could start, and it was probably
    a mercy that she did. We had to scream at the
    hospital a few times because they were too concerned
    about turning her into a narcotic addict at the end,

    If I were in her situation, I'd rather become narcotic
    addict than endure pain.

    Quoted message said:

    but by and large her suffering was managed well. My heart
    goes out to you and your family.

    Steve

  15. Amanda said:

    If I were in her situation, I'd rather become narcotic
    addict than endure pain.

    Addiction is rare in people who take narcotic analgesics
    specifically for the purpose of reducing or eliminating
    pain. They do become physically dependent after a time, but
    they do not become psychologically dependent. In other
    words, if the cause of the pain disappears, they can simply
    stop taking the narcotics, endure the withdrawal syndrome,
    and they're clean.

    Addiction is mainly a problem with people who take drugs
    for psychological reasons, as opposed to legitimate
    medical reasons.

    In any case, in a patient who will die without any
    elimination of the cause of pain, there's no point in
    worrying about addiction. Analgesics can be used freely as
    necessary to make the patient as comfortable as possible.

    --
    Transpose hotmail and mxsmanic in my e-mail address to reach
    me directly.

  16. Amanda said:

    If I were in her situation, I'd rather become narcotic
    addict than endure pain.

    The withholding of narcotics from the terminally ill
    is inexcusable.

    Steve

    Quoted message said:


    Quoted message said:

    but by and large her suffering was managed well. My heart
    goes out to you and your family.

    Steve


  17. Mxsmanic said:
    Amanda said:

    If I were in her situation, I'd rather become narcotic
    addict than endure pain.

    Addiction is rare in people who take narcotic analgesics
    specifically for the purpose of reducing or eliminating
    pain. They do become physically dependent after a time,
    but they do not become psychologically dependent. In other
    words, if the cause of the pain disappears, they can
    simply stop taking the narcotics, endure the withdrawal
    syndrome, and they're clean.

    Addiction is mainly a problem with people who take drugs
    for psychological reasons, as opposed to legitimate
    medical reasons.

    In any case, in a patient who will die without any
    elimination of the cause of pain, there's no point in
    worrying about addiction. Analgesics can be used freely as
    necessary to make the patient as comfortable as possible.

    I agree.

    Best, Steve

  18. Mxsmanic said:
    REP said:

    My father's doctors told him to "go home and prepare to
    die; we can't do anything for you" when his bone cancer of
    the spine was finally diagnosed. This was ten years ago;
    perhaps attitudes have changed now.

    Did he die? If so, how long after diagnosis?

    Remember that doctors don't like to tell people that they
    are going to die; it's equivalent to telling them that
    they are incompetent.

    No it's not. Being able to communicate and guide
    patients regarding their condition, good news or
    bad, is a very important part of the job. Any doctor
    who thinks communicating bad news is an admission of
    incompetence should find another line of work.

    Steve

    Nobody

    Quoted message said:

    likes being helpless, least of all physicians who have
    spent years training to keep people healthy and alive.
    Even when death is inevitable and beyond the reach of
    medical science, many doctors feel personally frustrated
    by cases that cannot be helped. Sometimes this
    exasperation may transpire in their bedside manner.

  19. In article <[email hidden]>,

    Beachhouse said:

    "REP" <[email hidden]> wrote in message -"]news:[email hidden]-
    berlin.de...

    Quoted message said:


    My father's doctors told him to "go home and prepare to
    die; we can't do anything for you" when his bone cancer
    of the spine was finally diagnosed. This was ten years
    ago; perhaps attitudes have changed now.

    Is that *really* in quotes? come on, now.

    Were you there?

    --
    "Did Father shoot him? I will eat Grandfather for dinner."
    - Helen Keller, on learning of the death of her grandfather

  20. In article <[email hidden]>,

    Mxsmanic said:
    REP said:

    My father's doctors told him to "go home and prepare to
    die; we can't do anything for you" when his bone cancer
    of the spine was finally diagnosed. This was ten years
    ago; perhaps attitudes have changed now.

    Did he die? If so, how long after diagnosis?

    Of course he died. He outlasted their prognosis, though; he
    died ten months later.

    Quoted message said:

    Remember that doctors don't like to tell people that they
    are going to die; it's equivalent to telling them that
    they are incompetent.

    Well, since they first told him he just had arthritis ...

    Quoted message said:

    Nobody likes being helpless, least of all physicians who
    have spent years training to keep people healthy and
    alive. Even when death is inevitable and beyond the reach
    of medical science, many doctors feel personally
    frustrated by cases that cannot be helped. Sometimes this
    exasperation may transpire in their bedside manner.

    That, however, is not an attitude to take out on a patient.

    --
    "Did Father shoot him? I will eat Grandfather for dinner."
    - Helen Keller, on learning of the death of her grandfather

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