OK, here it is--the most important Poll of the U.S. Presidential
Election!
It is not a political poll. It is a unicycle poll. For unicyclists.
About the future of unicycling in America, and, the world.
Question:
Which of the presidential candidates is more likely to ride the
unicycle?
Of course I listed Mr. Bush and Mr. Kerry, one of whom shall become the
next unicyclist-in-chief. One of them will win, certainly.
I also added Mr. Nader (he will NOT win, this is also very certain) only
to avoid those annoying posts from people saying "Oh, what about Nader,
You didn't put Nader in, Nader, Nader..." so he's there too.
Like I said, this is not supposed to be political. Just think as deeply
as you can, and try to imagine which one of these guys could actually
become a unicyclist. Even if you normally favor Bush, but do think that
Kerry is more likely to get on a Giraffe, you have to vote for the
unicyclist here. Or, if you are a die hard Kerry supporter, but, you
have to admit, Bush will look pretty natural on that Hunter, you too
must vote for the unicyclist. It's important...
Personally, I am undecided on this question. I can imagine Bush on a
Muni--I can also imagine Bush dressed up in a flight suit--would it be
for real?
Kerry seemes to be more of a trials man, but would his unicycling
triumph be based on 30 year old pictures of him doing hops with an
ancient schwinn?
Nader? Oh, come on, he rides a bike, (a very safe one though...)
One guy who is not on the poll is Howard Dean. Like him or not, you have
to give him a bit of unicyclist's slack--this is a man who changed his
religion because of a bike path dispute. Now THAT is a unicyclist (even
if Dr Dean does not know it himself). I have no problem imagining him on
ANY unicycle--his campaign was "totally unicycle," when you think about
it, in my opinion.... But he's out of the race....
For you cowards out there (and for myself because I can not decide
between Bush and Kerry due to the unicycle question) I leave open an
undecided option.
Vote! And everyone, all ages, all nationalities are invited!
Who will freemount that golden Coker and ride it into the White
House?!
--Ted.
--
wheelie_big_wheel
HOOKED on a HOOKWORM--that's ME!
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