Some Questions Dad With Cancer/Metastatic Disease



T

Talisman

Guest
hi,

i just have some questions i'd be interested in hearing
people's opinions/experiences with, regarding my dad's
struggle with cancer.

** some history

had shingles and was in a lot of pain

pain with shingles persisted for a long time, then had chest
pain and the doctor ordered some tests

they basically found cancers in the right lung (about 3.5cm
in size) and in various other bone areas (i.e. pelvis, ribs,
neck area) - metastatic disease (?).

he was admitted to hospital and was given a radium
treatment, calcium extraction and then things started to
get worse.

currently he is very gaunt, having trouble breathing, blood
clots have developed and he is becoming anemic and they've
given him several blood transfusions but the blood keeps
going bad.

basically the specialists say that it is incurable and the
best thing is keep him as comfortable as possible through
pallative care.

i guess i don't need to say how much my dad but i feel
frustrated that basically that they are not going to do
anything further to try and have a *chance* of "fixing" him
- for want of a better term.

i can understand why they are saying in that it further
radium treatments, let alone chemo would probably either
kill him or decrease the quality of life prior to death.

they don't want to give him anti clotting drugs because they
feel it will have other bad side effects (internal bleeding
or make things worse).

it seems to be a vicious circle of where one drug is used to
treat one part of the problem, it then causes another bad
reaction somewhere else.

i guess i feel helpless after all the good things dad has
done for me over my life and would like to hear other
people's experiences/thoughts.

if this is the wrong newsgroup to post to pls let me know.
 
talisman <[email protected]> wrote:

> i guess i feel helpless after all the good things dad has
> done for me over my life and would like to hear other
> people's experiences/thoughts.

I lost my mate, presumably to leukemia, and once I seperated
the specific details concerning why she died from the basic
reality of life/death cycles, I found I was no longer in
conflict with the experience, and can point out that what
you are going through is happening or will happen to
everyone who outlives their parents or other family members.
I also think the introspection that takes place under such
circumstances can offer an opportunity for change and
awareness, especially regarding social habits we accumulate
that tend to negate rather than reinforce our minds and
bodies over time. The disease paradigm that has been
fomented by medical technology does not provide a blanket
"answer" to living and dying, merely a response that is not
necessarily appropriate in the aftermath of catastrophic
health "failure". Do not be angry with doctors who are
willing to be honest with you about what they can and can't
do, it is pratically impossible to undo the ravages of time
in an instant.

> if this is the wrong newsgroup to post to pls let me know.

There is a cancer support newsgroup that might be more
suited to your needs, but you are welcome to learn more
about advances in research and cancer treatment that
encourage a more participatory and preventative approach to
health and health care:

http://www.vitaletherapeutics.org/vtlwhatr.htm

--
_o Kristofer Dale, _ \<,_ ragged individualist,
_____( )/ ( )_____ statistic at large...

p.s. Learn and live, http://www.vitaletherapeutics.org
 
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