Mass Chaos and Confusion TdH Prologue

Having confirmed that my cat was going to be watched by a coworker I
was awake and out the door of my apartment by 7:30am. I rarely choose
to wake up much before 9am but today was important.

I bought breakfast on my way to the starting line and was already well
inside the closed to traffic area when I got a telephone call. Where
was I? Only it wasn't from the driver of Com 3's car. It was from
Com 3. And Yokota-san didn't merely not know where I was, he also
didn't know where his driver was. Or how to get to the starting line
for that matter.

I seemed to recall something about having written a very very detailed
set of instructions the night before about how to get to the starting
line just in case any of the team vehicles got seperated from the
parade convoy from the resort to the opening. After some two hours
effort on the part of four or five different people to produce an
acceptable map along with a bilingual set of directions with a format
cribbed out of the technical guide complete with every junction and
landmarks along the way someone came to the conclusion that actually
telling people how to get to the opening line might give them ideas
about not joining the parade convoy to the opening line so they didn't
print it after all.

When I managed to get out of the controlled area and catch a moto to
the closest intersection with the beach road the idea was that Com 3
was going to drive himself until he saw me and pick me up. However he
somehow became absorbed by the parade convoy so things went a bit
slower and I had ample time to notice a new Fushan Coffee restaurant
across the street, go in, and buy a half kilo of beans for the race
(thus alleviating the need for borrowing my boss's stale Starbucks).

Once at the starting line I accompanied him and tried my best to be a
helpful translator. I'm getting lots of practice at live translation
this way. I only wish I were more comfortable with my live
translation skills. No one seems to be complaining (yet) but I'm
happier with people who speak one sentence, wait for translation, and
then speak the next, and happiest with print.

At one point as I walked back and forth with Com 3 I accidentally
kicked the Director of Athletic Events Department of the Sanya City
Bureau of Culture, Radio and Television, Publishing and Sport in the
ankle. I say 'accidentally' because I had meant to kick him in the
ankle -and- elbow him in the ribs but only succedeed in getting his
ankle. I got him good and hard. He gave a muffled yelp and looked
startled but because I was personally accompanying Yokota-san didn't
dare say anything.

A week previous he had claimed that a month previous at the Sanya City
Circuit Race there not only was a lap board but that he had personally
informed me at the finish line that I was short a lap. Apparently
because I was so dehydrated that I had to get on the ambulance I had
also been confused and had forgotten speaking to him. Apparently
confusion caused by dehydration is virulently contagious because none
of the people who were with me at the finish line saw him either. And
none of the people I have talked to who were at the race as
competitors or spectators managed to see the lap board.

I was told that one of the main conditions of getting the opportunity
to ride in the Com car is that 'what happens in the Com car stays in
the Com car" so I won't write anything about that.

It was really cool though. I even got to get on the radio.

After the stage was over I was on my way out of the #1 Dining Hall
when I saw most of the
Commissaires sitting together eating. "And do you have the promised
coffee with you today" I was asked.
Indeed, I did. In fact, since I'd just gotten my luggage out of the
car it was in, I had my coffee maker with me there in the dining hall.
I went and got my bag. I opened my bag. First I pulled out the bag
of coffee beans. They nodded. Then I pulled out the coffee grinder.
More nods. Then I pulled out the coffee maker. "Okay," one of them
said, "the Commissaire's Panel have made the decision that you can sit
in Com 3's car again tomorrow." Then I pulled out the bottle of
single malt scotch whiskey. "Okay," another one of them said, "the
Commissaire's Panel has now made the decision that you can sit in Com
2's car tomorrow."

That evening, however, when the Secretariat was having a meeting, [censored]
told me that I absolutely had to leave at 8:30 with the staff vehicle
to go ahead and set up computers. I said that the comissaires told me
to ride in the com car. He said it didn't matter. My position was
with the Secretariat. But if I'm not riding in Com 3's car, who will
be his translator? Not our responsibility I was told. I must leave
at 8:30 in the morning.

[censored] seemed to think that 'giving in to my demands' that I be allowed
to see just one stage was plenty enough. And besides which, he was in
the police car at the front in Stage One and didn't even get Race
Radio.

[censored] is perhaps last on the list of those who I would expect to hear
complaints about not having the opportunity to hear Race Radio. He
doesn't especially like cycling. It isn't that he dislikes it per se
and since he started with the Tour the bike club has even convinced
him to buy a bicycle of his own but he only works for the bike race
because he was told to work for the bike race. And because of his
English skills and the very good job he did for last year's Tour he's
earned himself a job in the cycling department at the 2008 Games.
But, so far as I can tell, he doesn't really enjoy it and he certainly
doesn't love it.

I decided arguing with him just wasn't worth the headache. At least I
got to see the racing once and there was a very good chance that the
combined factors of there not being a translator specifically assigned
to Com 3 and Yokota-san's saying he'd like me to come back again meant
that I'd probably be back in the car by Stage 3.

Some time later Ulzii-Orshikh Jamsran from the Mongolian Cycling
Federation was there to pick up the day's results to give to his team.
He noticed one of my coworkers, Wei Wei, drinking a cup of coffee.
"Where did we get coffee from?" he asked.
"From my coffee maker," I replied.
"What coffee were we making?" he asked.
I showed him the bag of Starbucks that was what Wei Wei was drinking.
"This is coffee beans. How did we make this into coffee?" he asked.
"With my coffee grinder." I replied.
"You have a coffee grinder?" he asked.
"Yes," and I pointed.
"I'll be right back," he said and ran out of the room.
He did not come back.
Instead, about twenty minutes later, two very tall very handsome
Mongolians with very little English showed up at the Secretariat.
"You. Girl. Coffee. Yes."
A bag of coffee beans was displayed.
Gestures were made.
"Coffee. Yes."
I got the coffee grinder.
I offered them the coffee grinder.
"No. No. You. You. Coffee. Yes."
"Me. Coffee. Yes."
"Yes. Coffee. Good. Yes."
They opened the bag of coffee.
I plugged the coffee grinder in.
They grinned really big. "Coffee. Girl. Thank you girl. Coffee.
Yes."
I turned the coffee grinder on.
If anything the grins got even bigger.
It isn't an especially big coffee grinder and it took four or five
rounds before all of the coffee was ground.
"Thank you girl. Thank you. Coffee. Yes."
Then they left me with a coffee grinder full of really oily and
wonderfully pungent dark coffee beans as a thank you gift.

And with that I decided that in the future I will always make sure to
bring a coffee maker with me to races. It's a good way to make
friends.

At a bit past 10 o'clock Wei Wei and I headed off to the number 2
hotel. Since this year's sponsors include the HNA International
Resorts Hotel Management Chain (a brand which I suspect only exists in
Southeast Asia and possibly only in China or even only Hainan but
which are quite nice) the main hotel is tending towards excessively
nice while the number 2 hotel is merely really really nice.

I've had apartments smaller than my hotel room was that evening.
Without nearly as nice furniture, or as a nice a view, or as big a
balcony, or a bathtub that has water straight from mineral hot
springs. I made
myself a bubble bath and with frequent refreshing of the water soaked
until nearly midnight.

-M

Having confirmed that my cat was going to be watched by a coworker I
was awake and out the door of my apartment by 7:30am. I rarely choose
to wake up much before 9am but today was important.

I bought breakfast on my way to the starting line and was already well
inside the closed to traffic area when I got a telephone call. Where
was I? Only it wasn't from the driver of Com 3's car. It was from
Com 3. And Yokota-san didn't merely not know where I was, he also
didn't know where his driver was. Or how to get to the starting line
for that matter.

I seemed to recall something about having written a very very detailed
set of instructions the night before about how to get to the starting
line just in case any of the team vehicles got seperated from the
parade convoy from the resort to the opening. After some two hours
effort on the part of four or five different people to produce an
acceptable map along with a bilingual set of directions with a format
cribbed out of the technical guide complete with every junction and
landmarks along the way someone came to the conclusion that actually
telling people how to get to the opening line might give them ideas
about not joining the parade convoy to the opening line so they didn't
print it after all.

When I managed to get out of the controlled area and catch a moto to
the closest intersection with the beach road the idea was that Com 3
was going to drive himself until he saw me and pick me up. However he
somehow became absorbed by the parade convoy so things went a bit
slower and I had ample time to notice a new Fushan Coffee restaurant
across the street, go in, and buy a half kilo of beans for the race
(thus alleviating the need for borrowing my boss's stale Starbucks).

Once at the starting line I accompanied him and tried my best to be a
helpful translator. I'm getting lots of practice at live translation
this way. I only wish I were more comfortable with my live
translation skills. No one seems to be complaining (yet) but I'm
happier with people who speak one sentence, wait for translation, and
then speak the next, and happiest with print.

At one point as I walked back and forth with Com 3 I accidentally
kicked the Director of Athletic Events Department of the Sanya City
Bureau of Culture, Radio and Television, Publishing and Sport in the
ankle. I say 'accidentally' because I had meant to kick him in the
ankle -and- elbow him in the ribs but only succedeed in getting his
ankle. I got him good and hard. He gave a muffled yelp and looked
startled but because I was personally accompanying Yokota-san didn't
dare say anything.

A week previous he had claimed that a month previous at the Sanya City
Circuit Race there not only was a lap board but that he had personally
informed me at the finish line that I was short a lap. Apparently
because I was so dehydrated that I had to get on the ambulance I had
also been confused and had forgotten speaking to him. Apparently
confusion caused by dehydration is virulently contagious because none
of the people who were with me at the finish line saw him either. And
none of the people I have talked to who were at the race as
competitors or spectators managed to see the lap board.

I was told that one of the main conditions of getting the opportunity
to ride in the Com car is that 'what happens in the Com car stays in
the Com car" so I won't write anything about that.

It was really cool though. I even got to get on the radio.

After the stage was over I was on my way out of the #1 Dining Hall
when I saw most of the
Commissaires sitting together eating. "And do you have the promised
coffee with you today" I was asked.
Indeed, I did. In fact, since I'd just gotten my luggage out of the
car it was in, I had my coffee maker with me there in the dining hall.
I went and got my bag. I opened my bag. First I pulled out the bag
of coffee beans. They nodded. Then I pulled out the coffee grinder.
More nods. Then I pulled out the coffee maker. "Okay," one of them
said, "the Commissaire's Panel have made the decision that you can sit
in Com 3's car again tomorrow." Then I pulled out the bottle of
single malt scotch whiskey. "Okay," another one of them said, "the
Commissaire's Panel has now made the decision that you can sit in Com
2's car tomorrow."

That evening, however, when the Secretariat was having a meeting, [censored]
told me that I absolutely had to leave at 8:30 with the staff vehicle
to go ahead and set up computers. I said that the comissaires told me
to ride in the com car. He said it didn't matter. My position was
with the Secretariat. But if I'm not riding in Com 3's car, who will
be his translator? Not our responsibility I was told. I must leave
at 8:30 in the morning.

[censored] seemed to think that 'giving in to my demands' that I be allowed
to see just one stage was plenty enough. And besides which, he was in
the police car at the front in Stage One and didn't even get Race
Radio.

[censored] is perhaps last on the list of those who I would expect to hear
complaints about not having the opportunity to hear Race Radio. He
doesn't especially like cycling. It isn't that he dislikes it per se
and since he started with the Tour the bike club has even convinced
him to buy a bicycle of his own but he only works for the bike race
because he was told to work for the bike race. And because of his
English skills and the very good job he did for last year's Tour he's
earned himself a job in the cycling department at the 2008 Games.
But, so far as I can tell, he doesn't really enjoy it and he certainly
doesn't love it.

I decided arguing with him just wasn't worth the headache. At least I
got to see the racing once and there was a very good chance that the
combined factors of there not being a translator specifically assigned
to Com 3 and Yokota-san's saying he'd like me to come back again meant
that I'd probably be back in the car by Stage 3.

Some time later Ulzii-Orshikh Jamsran from the Mongolian Cycling
Federation was there to pick up the day's results to give to his team.
He noticed one of my coworkers, Wei Wei, drinking a cup of coffee.
"Where did we get coffee from?" he asked.
"From my coffee maker," I replied.
"What coffee were we making?" he asked.
I showed him the bag of Starbucks that was what Wei Wei was drinking.
"This is coffee beans. How did we make this into coffee?" he asked.
"With my coffee grinder." I replied.
"You have a coffee grinder?" he asked.
"Yes," and I pointed.
"I'll be right back," he said and ran out of the room.
He did not come back.
Instead, about twenty minutes later, two very tall very handsome
Mongolians with very little English showed up at the Secretariat.
"You. Girl. Coffee. Yes."
A bag of coffee beans was displayed.
Gestures were made.
"Coffee. Yes."
I got the coffee grinder.
I offered them the coffee grinder.
"No. No. You. You. Coffee. Yes."
"Me. Coffee. Yes."
"Yes. Coffee. Good. Yes."
They opened the bag of coffee.
I plugged the coffee grinder in.
They grinned really big. "Coffee. Girl. Thank you girl. Coffee.
Yes."
I turned the coffee grinder on.
If anything the grins got even bigger.
It isn't an especially big coffee grinder and it took four or five
rounds before all of the coffee was ground.
"Thank you girl. Thank you. Coffee. Yes."
Then they left me with a coffee grinder full of really oily and
wonderfully pungent dark coffee beans as a thank you gift.

And with that I decided that in the future I will always make sure to
bring a coffee maker with me to races. It's a good way to make
friends.

At a bit past 10 o'clock Wei Wei and I headed off to the number 2
hotel. Since this year's sponsors include the HNA International
Resorts Hotel Management Chain (a brand which I suspect only exists in
Southeast Asia and possibly only in China or even only Hainan but
which are quite nice) the main hotel is tending towards excessively
nice while the number 2 hotel is merely really really nice.

I've had apartments smaller than my hotel room was that evening.
Without nearly as nice furniture, or as a nice a view, or as big a
balcony, or a bathtub that has water straight from mineral hot
springs. I made
myself a bubble bath and with frequent refreshing of the water soaked
until nearly midnight.

-M

The morning started with a phone call from Wei Wei. They were about
ready to drive over to the other hotel. Did I want to come with?

I was still asleep.

They waited while I very quickly got dressed and repacked my
luggage.

I'd just gotten to the main hotel when Com 3's driver called me.
Where was I? I was about to get in the Secretariat car and leave.
"No no no no no," he says, "you are in the car with me. You are
translating for Com 3." "But [censored] says I have to..." he cut me off
"it doesn't matter what [censored] says. The international commissaire says
is what matters."

This was so not a situation I wanted to find myself in. But, [censored]
wasn't actually present and the other people from the Secretariat all
thought that it was reasonable for me to go so they got in their car
and left without me.

At the start line I was met by [censored]. What are you doing here?
Aren't you supposed to have left already? Com 3 told me I was riding
in his car again today. But I told you you were leaving early. Yes,
but the com told me that I was riding in his car again today. I
walked away before he could continue the argument.

Later he came by again wanting to make sure I knew that anything
that happened in the Com Car must stay in the Com Car and could not be
spoken about. I knew this. Of course I knew this. It was very
clearly told to me in my native language by other native speakers
before I even got in the car in the first place.

I knew this.
I told him I knew this.

If I knew this why was I talking about what happened in the Com Car
with other people.
I wasn't talking about what happened in the Com Car with other
people.

He'd heard that I was talking to people about what happened in the
car.
I wasn't talking about what happened in the Com Car with other
people.

He said I wasn't allowed to talk about what happened in the Com Car
with other people.
I told him this was fine because I hadn't talked about what happened
in the Com Car with other people.

The Chinese translator for the Georgian team told him I was talking
about what happened in the Com Car.
I didn't talk about what happened in the Com Car with the translator
for the Georgian team. While the two of us were looking at the
results sheet together he asked why Georgia was mentioned twice in the
cash penalties and I explained to him how to read the stage results.

Well you shouldn't talk about what happens in the Com Car with other
people.
But I did not talk about what happened in the Com Car. I knew not
to talk about what happened in the Com Car. I only talked about how
to read results when the results were in front of me and the person I
was talking with.

As he left he reminded me that I wasn't allowed to talk about what
happened in the Com Car with other people and that if he heard I had
been talking about what happened in the Com Car with other people
again he wouldn't let me ride there any more.

Despite this taking place mostly in Chinese I got the feeling that
he hadn't listened to a word I said.

Some twenty minutes later he saw me talking with two guys from
CCTV. They didn't have their camera with them. As soon as they left
he ran over to me and scolded me.

Most of the time I really like [censored]. He's a really nice guy. But
when he's under pressure he's a royal pain in the ass. He'd somehow
managed to remember that he'd been told that Marian was not supposed
to be on TV this year but had managed to forget that Marian was the
one who told him that Marian did not like being on TV and did not want
to be on TV this year so when he saw Marian talking with people from
one of the TV stations he came over and yelled at Marian about how she
wasn't supposed to be on TV.

I know not to talk about what happens in the Com Car with other
people so you won't read about that here. None of it. Since I wasn't
as nervous as I had been the day before it was even more fun.

I got to get on the radio a couple of times. Mostly on the private
radio but twice I was told to go on the public radio. I was really
nervous and stuttered syllables, words, and once an entire sentence
but no one seemed to be especially bothered by it. The one time on
public broadcast when I really got flustered the Radio Tour came on
afterwards and told me that I didn't need to repeat myself so many
times but he sounded friendly.

Some two hours after the last time I was on the public radio when I
got a phone call from [censored] telling me that I wasn't allowed to be on
the radio and that if he heard me on the radio again I wouldn't be
allowed to ride in the Com Car. I said that I was Com 3's translator
riding in Com 3's car and Com 3 had instructed me to use Com 3's radio
and it wasn't any of his business. He told me I wasn't allowed to use
the radio. I started to say that it was Com 3's car and Com 3's radio
and Com 3 who had told me to use the radio but he hung up on me in the
middle of the sentence.

I called him back and let him talk to Com 3. Com 3 told him that I
was Com 3's translator riding in Com 3's car and if Com 3 told Com 3's
translator in Com 3's car to use Com 3's radio it was Com 3's business
and that [censored] had no say in the matter. This was repeated three or
four times to the extent that I got the feeling [censored] wasn't listening
until eventually Com 3 hung up.

The main hotel was Waika International in Wenchang. They have pain
au chocolat. Bittersweet chocolate in flaky croissant pastry. I've
had worse in real cities like Hong Kong. I've had worse in the US. I
ate dinner with some guys from Intel Action who I had met at the Tour
of Qinghai and they wanted to know if, as a local, I was going to find
a disco to take the whole race to on the last night. Apparently since
this is the Tour's first year out of Sanya and most of the other
people involved with the race had come down from Haikou they had
somehow determined that it was my responsibility to find a good disco
and they were going to tell all of the other cyclists who they were
friends with that it was my responsibility to find a good disco.

I promptly sent a text message to a DJ I know asking what club in
Sanya would be especially good for having an extra 120 people show up.

After dinner I was sitting in the Secretariat with a bunch of others
including Frank and Wei Wei when the International Commissaires all
showed up. The Chief Com had sugar packets. The Radio Tour was
carrying cups. The Technical Advisor from Australia had a glass of
milk. And they wanted to know where the coffee was.

I made coffee for a while. Two rounds for the coms and also some
for the secretary of the Taiwan Cycling Federation and his wife.
Coffee is definitely a good way to make friends.

While I was making coffee [censored] approached the Chief Com about the
radio. I wasn't authorized to use the radio. Why had I been using
the radio. The Chief Com explained that I was riding in Com 3's car
as Com 3's translator and if Com 3 instructed Com 3's translator to
use Com 3's radio while riding in Com 3's car it was Com 3's business
and had nothing to do with [censored].

Having already not listened to me or Com 3 he also didn't listen to
the Chief Com because the radio discussion would continue well into
Stage Three.

I was, again, staying at the #2 hotel which, in this case, was
actually nicer than the #1 hotel with the exception of being 25
kilometers away from the finish instead of across the street. If
anything my hotel room was bigger than it had been the night before
and it also had feather pillows. No mineral hot spring water in the
bathtub though. There is definitely an advantage to being sponsored
by a resort chain.

-M

The morning started with a phone call from Wei Wei. They were about
ready to drive over to the other hotel. Did I want to come with?

I was still asleep.

They waited while I very quickly got dressed and repacked my
luggage.

I'd just gotten to the main hotel when Com 3's driver called me.
Where was I? I was about to get in the Secretariat car and leave.
"No no no no no," he says, "you are in the car with me. You are
translating for Com 3." "But [censored] says I have to..." he cut me off
"it doesn't matter what [censored] says. The international commissaire says
is what matters."

This was so not a situation I wanted to find myself in. But, [censored]
wasn't actually present and the other people from the Secretariat all
thought that it was reasonable for me to go so they got in their car
and left without me.

At the start line I was met by [censored]. What are you doing here?
Aren't you supposed to have left already? Com 3 told me I was riding
in his car again today. But I told you you were leaving early. Yes,
but the com told me that I was riding in his car again today. I
walked away before he could continue the argument.

Later he came by again wanting to make sure I knew that anything
that happened in the Com Car must stay in the Com Car and could not be
spoken about. I knew this. Of course I knew this. It was very
clearly told to me in my native language by other native speakers
before I even got in the car in the first place.

I knew this.
I told him I knew this.

If I knew this why was I talking about what happened in the Com Car
with other people.
I wasn't talking about what happened in the Com Car with other
people.

He'd heard that I was talking to people about what happened in the
car.
I wasn't talking about what happened in the Com Car with other
people.

He said I wasn't allowed to talk about what happened in the Com Car
with other people.
I told him this was fine because I hadn't talked about what happened
in the Com Car with other people.

The Chinese translator for the Georgian team told him I was talking
about what happened in the Com Car.
I didn't talk about what happened in the Com Car with the translator
for the Georgian team. While the two of us were looking at the
results sheet together he asked why Georgia was mentioned twice in the
cash penalties and I explained to him how to read the stage results.

Well you shouldn't talk about what happens in the Com Car with other
people.
But I did not talk about what happened in the Com Car. I knew not
to talk about what happened in the Com Car. I only talked about how
to read results when the results were in front of me and the person I
was talking with.

As he left he reminded me that I wasn't allowed to talk about what
happened in the Com Car with other people and that if he heard I had
been talking about what happened in the Com Car with other people
again he wouldn't let me ride there any more.

Despite this taking place mostly in Chinese I got the feeling that
he hadn't listened to a word I said.

Some twenty minutes later he saw me talking with two guys from
CCTV. They didn't have their camera with them. As soon as they left
he ran over to me and scolded me.

Most of the time I really like [censored]. He's a really nice guy. But
when he's under pressure he's a royal pain in the ass. He'd somehow
managed to remember that he'd been told that Marian was not supposed
to be on TV this year but had managed to forget that Marian was the
one who told him that Marian did not like being on TV and did not want
to be on TV this year so when he saw Marian talking with people from
one of the TV stations he came over and yelled at Marian about how she
wasn't supposed to be on TV.

I know not to talk about what happens in the Com Car with other
people so you won't read about that here. None of it. Since I wasn't
as nervous as I had been the day before it was even more fun.

I got to get on the radio a couple of times. Mostly on the private
radio but twice I was told to go on the public radio. I was really
nervous and stuttered syllables, words, and once an entire sentence
but no one seemed to be especially bothered by it. The one time on
public broadcast when I really got flustered the Radio Tour came on
afterwards and told me that I didn't need to repeat myself so many
times but he sounded friendly.

Some two hours after the last time I was on the public radio when I
got a phone call from [censored] telling me that I wasn't allowed to be on
the radio and that if he heard me on the radio again I wouldn't be
allowed to ride in the Com Car. I said that I was Com 3's translator
riding in Com 3's car and Com 3 had instructed me to use Com 3's radio
and it wasn't any of his business. He told me I wasn't allowed to use
the radio. I started to say that it was Com 3's car and Com 3's radio
and Com 3 who had told me to use the radio but he hung up on me in the
middle of the sentence.

I called him back and let him talk to Com 3. Com 3 told him that I
was Com 3's translator riding in Com 3's car and if Com 3 told Com 3's
translator in Com 3's car to use Com 3's radio it was Com 3's business
and that [censored] had no say in the matter. This was repeated three or
four times to the extent that I got the feeling [censored] wasn't listening
until eventually Com 3 hung up.

The main hotel was Waika International in Wenchang. They have pain
au chocolat. Bittersweet chocolate in flaky croissant pastry. I've
had worse in real cities like Hong Kong. I've had worse in the US. I
ate dinner with some guys from Intel Action who I had met at the Tour
of Qinghai and they wanted to know if, as a local, I was going to find
a disco to take the whole race to on the last night. Apparently since
this is the Tour's first year out of Sanya and most of the other
people involved with the race had come down from Haikou they had
somehow determined that it was my responsibility to find a good disco
and they were going to tell all of the other cyclists who they were
friends with that it was my responsibility to find a good disco.

I promptly sent a text message to a DJ I know asking what club in
Sanya would be especially good for having an extra 120 people show up.

After dinner I was sitting in the Secretariat with a bunch of others
including Frank and Wei Wei when the International Commissaires all
showed up. The Chief Com had sugar packets. The Radio Tour was
carrying cups. The Technical Advisor from Australia had a glass of
milk. And they wanted to know where the coffee was.

I made coffee for a while. Two rounds for the coms and also some
for the secretary of the Taiwan Cycling Federation and his wife.
Coffee is definitely a good way to make friends.

While I was making coffee [censored] approached the Chief Com about the
radio. I wasn't authorized to use the radio. Why had I been using
the radio. The Chief Com explained that I was riding in Com 3's car
as Com 3's translator and if Com 3 instructed Com 3's translator to
use Com 3's radio while riding in Com 3's car it was Com 3's business
and had nothing to do with [censored].

Having already not listened to me or Com 3 he also didn't listen to
the Chief Com because the radio discussion would continue well into
Stage Three.

I was, again, staying at the #2 hotel which, in this case, was
actually nicer than the #1 hotel with the exception of being 25
kilometers away from the finish instead of across the street. If
anything my hotel room was bigger than it had been the night before
and it also had feather pillows. No mineral hot spring water in the
bathtub though. There is definitely an advantage to being sponsored
by a resort chain.

-M

At the breakfast buffet I ran into [censored]. He wanted to let me know
that he had decided that I would be allowed to talk on the radio in
Chinese but if he heard me talk on the radio in English I would be
permanently out of the race.

I told him it wasn't his business. I was Com 3's translator. I was
sitting in Com 3's car. Com 3 had told Com 3's translator in Com 3's
car to use Com 3's radio. The only people who got to make decisions
about Com 3's radio and who would use Com 3's radio were the
commissaires. Since [censored] was not a commissaire he did not have the
right to make any decision regarding what I would or would not do on
the radio. He didn't listen.

Com 3's driver and I went over to the main hotel together. On the
way we tried to stop and get gas. The first Sinopec gas station
couldn't take the prepaid gas cards Sinopec had provided as one of the
sponsors. The next Sinopec gas station also couldn't. The third and
fourth gas stations weren't Sinopec. Nor was the fifth. On our way
back towards the hotel we passed the former location of what should
have been a Sinopec gas station but which was currently being
remodeled and then drove past a Sinopec which the driver already knew
(from the night before) as being unable to take the prepaid Sinopec
cards. Eventually he just gave up and decided to refill in Haikou.

At the hotel I told Com 3 what [censored] had told me. He wasn't
especially happy about this. Something about it not being any of
[censored]'s business to tell Com 3's translator what she could or could not
do when sitting in Com 3's car. He said that he'd be talking to [censored]
as soon as he saw him.

On my way into the hotel to grab some pastry from the buffet (my
hotel's breakfast was really good but it wasn't western breakfast and
it didn't have croissant) I saw [censored] animatedly talking at an official
from the CCA. Then I saw the official talking with the Chief Com.
Back out and I see [censored] being talked to by Com 3. His body language
is something I recognize from my own rebellious and unrepentant
behavior as a teen and I can tell that the words aren't even having a
chance to go in one ear before going out the other.

Later the Chief Com comes by and says that the organizer has decided
that I'm not allowed to be on the radio but that it is at Com 3's
discretion to determine whether or not a situation requires me to be
on the radio.

During the commissaires' morning meeting (which I was supposed to be
translating at) the official that [censored] was talking at that morning
comes over and gets me because he has something really important to
talk to me about. It seems [censored] has told him that the Chief Com has
problems with my talking on the radio and he wants to know why I was
talking on the radio. I was talking on Com 3's radio because I am Com
3's translator sitting in Com 3's car and Com 3 told me to talk on Com
3's radio. And so far as I can tell from everything I've seen and
heard about this situation the only one who has any problem with me
being on the radio is [censored] and the only problem the coms have about me
being on the radio is that [censored] keeps bothering them about it.

This guy actually listened to me. Or at least made a very credible
impression of listening. He said he'd talk to Com 3 to clarify the
situation. Then he told me to try not to do anything to annoy [censored]
too much because he's under a lot of pressure.

Riding in the Com's car was actually pretty boring for most of Stage
Three. There were no opportunities for him to speak on the radio let
alone for him to decide, at his discretion as commissaire, that I
needed to speak on the radio.

Lots of crashes near the end of the stage which seems strange
because it isn't an especially dangerous stretch of road. Last year
saw a lot of crashes in the same place. It must be haunted or
something.

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

I avoided the ticket taker at lunch and again at dinner. Swerving,
ducking, and pretending was really starting to get on my nerves. You
only get food tickets for the hotel you are staying in. And I'm not
staying in the #1 hotel. The food at the #2 hotel is perfectly good.
The problem arises in that the #2 hotel is in another location and I'm
in the secretariat. I (as well as a few of the others I work with who
are also ducking the ticket taker) flat out refuse to leave the #1
hotel to go to lunch, come back to the #1 hotel to go to work, leave
the #1 hotel to go to dinner, come back to the #1 hotel to go to work
and leave the #1 hotel to go to sleep. It's ridiculous. So we cadge
tickets, pretend to have forgotten them, or just brazenly walk in
while ignoring the hotel ticket taker.

-M

At the breakfast buffet I ran into [censored]. He wanted to let me know
that he had decided that I would be allowed to talk on the radio in
Chinese but if he heard me talk on the radio in English I would be
permanently out of the race.

I told him it wasn't his business. I was Com 3's translator. I was
sitting in Com 3's car. Com 3 had told Com 3's translator in Com 3's
car to use Com 3's radio. The only people who got to make decisions
about Com 3's radio and who would use Com 3's radio were the
commissaires. Since [censored] was not a commissaire he did not have the
right to make any decision regarding what I would or would not do on
the radio. He didn't listen.

Com 3's driver and I went over to the main hotel together. On the
way we tried to stop and get gas. The first Sinopec gas station
couldn't take the prepaid gas cards Sinopec had provided as one of the
sponsors. The next Sinopec gas station also couldn't. The third and
fourth gas stations weren't Sinopec. Nor was the fifth. On our way
back towards the hotel we passed the former location of what should
have been a Sinopec gas station but which was currently being
remodeled and then drove past a Sinopec which the driver already knew
(from the night before) as being unable to take the prepaid Sinopec
cards. Eventually he just gave up and decided to refill in Haikou.

At the hotel I told Com 3 what [censored] had told me. He wasn't
especially happy about this. Something about it not being any of
[censored]'s business to tell Com 3's translator what she could or could not
do when sitting in Com 3's car. He said that he'd be talking to [censored]
as soon as he saw him.

On my way into the hotel to grab some pastry from the buffet (my
hotel's breakfast was really good but it wasn't western breakfast and
it didn't have croissant) I saw [censored] animatedly talking at an official
from the CCA. Then I saw the official talking with the Chief Com.
Back out and I see [censored] being talked to by Com 3. His body language
is something I recognize from my own rebellious and unrepentant
behavior as a teen and I can tell that the words aren't even having a
chance to go in one ear before going out the other.

Later the Chief Com comes by and says that the organizer has decided
that I'm not allowed to be on the radio but that it is at Com 3's
discretion to determine whether or not a situation requires me to be
on the radio.

During the commissaires' morning meeting (which I was supposed to be
translating at) the official that [censored] was talking at that morning
comes over and gets me because he has something really important to
talk to me about. It seems [censored] has told him that the Chief Com has
problems with my talking on the radio and he wants to know why I was
talking on the radio. I was talking on Com 3's radio because I am Com
3's translator sitting in Com 3's car and Com 3 told me to talk on Com
3's radio. And so far as I can tell from everything I've seen and
heard about this situation the only one who has any problem with me
being on the radio is [censored] and the only problem the coms have about me
being on the radio is that [censored] keeps bothering them about it.

This guy actually listened to me. Or at least made a very credible
impression of listening. He said he'd talk to Com 3 to clarify the
situation. Then he told me to try not to do anything to annoy [censored]
too much because he's under a lot of pressure.

Riding in the Com's car was actually pretty boring for most of Stage
Three. There were no opportunities for him to speak on the radio let
alone for him to decide, at his discretion as commissaire, that I
needed to speak on the radio.

Lots of crashes near the end of the stage which seems strange
because it isn't an especially dangerous stretch of road. Last year
saw a lot of crashes in the same place. It must be haunted or
something.

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

I avoided the ticket taker at lunch and again at dinner. Swerving,
ducking, and pretending was really starting to get on my nerves. You
only get food tickets for the hotel you are staying in. And I'm not
staying in the #1 hotel. The food at the #2 hotel is perfectly good.
The problem arises in that the #2 hotel is in another location and I'm
in the secretariat. I (as well as a few of the others I work with who
are also ducking the ticket taker) flat out refuse to leave the #1
hotel to go to lunch, come back to the #1 hotel to go to work, leave
the #1 hotel to go to dinner, come back to the #1 hotel to go to work
and leave the #1 hotel to go to sleep. It's ridiculous. So we cadge
tickets, pretend to have forgotten them, or just brazenly walk in
while ignoring the hotel ticket taker.

-M

aka Marian Rosenberg said:

...
At one point as I walked back and forth with Com 3 I accidentally
kicked the Director of Athletic Events Department of the Sanya City
Bureau of Culture, Radio and Television, Publishing and Sport in the
ankle. I say 'accidentally' because I had meant to kick him in the
ankle -and- elbow him in the ribs but only succedeed in getting his
ankle. I got him good and hard. He gave a muffled yelp and looked
startled but because I was personally accompanying Yokota-san didn't
dare say anything....

Don't mess with Mountain Rose!

--
Tom Sherman - Holstein-Friesland Bovinia
Tradition is the worst rational for action.

aka Marian Rosenberg said:

...
At one point as I walked back and forth with Com 3 I accidentally
kicked the Director of Athletic Events Department of the Sanya City
Bureau of Culture, Radio and Television, Publishing and Sport in the
ankle. I say 'accidentally' because I had meant to kick him in the
ankle -and- elbow him in the ribs but only succedeed in getting his
ankle. I got him good and hard. He gave a muffled yelp and looked
startled but because I was personally accompanying Yokota-san didn't
dare say anything....

Don't mess with Mountain Rose!

--
Tom Sherman - Holstein-Friesland Bovinia
Tradition is the worst rational for action.

In article <[email hidden]>,
"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote:

These entries are great! But I am curious as to what (to the extent you
are willing to say) is the cause of the com-car omerta you describe. Is
it a case of conversations like "oh, there's rider X, that's a rather
dubious-looking bottle pass/caravan drafting move he pulling, but he
just had a flat, so we're not going to record that one"?

Quoted message said:

At the breakfast buffet I ran into [censored]. He wanted to let me know
that he had decided that I would be allowed to talk on the radio in
Chinese but if he heard me talk on the radio in English I would be
permanently out of the race.

Quoted message said:

Lots of crashes near the end of the stage which seems strange
because it isn't an especially dangerous stretch of road. Last year
saw a lot of crashes in the same place. It must be haunted or
something.

Riders at all levels need no reason to crash. I sometimes think that
obviously dangerous sections cause riders to compensate aggressively,
thus being less prone to crashing there, while the ordinary
"just-riding-along" parts of the course are where riders will be in
tight quarters, not worrying about falling down, and that's when two
guys in the middle of the pack hook bars and pull each other down.

Quoted message said:

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

There's a very well-defined UCI protocol for photographer positioning at
the finish line. Faint memory suggest it involves a diagonal line that
starts at least 15m from the finish, and photographers standing behind
that. It's likely the photographer was either illegally positioned, or
the rider just crashed into him regardless.

--
Ryan Cousineau [email hidden] http://www.wiredcola.com/
"My scenarios may give the impression I could be an excellent crook.
Not true - I am a talented lawyer." - Sandy in rec.bicycles.racing

In article <[email hidden]>,
"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote:

These entries are great! But I am curious as to what (to the extent you
are willing to say) is the cause of the com-car omerta you describe. Is
it a case of conversations like "oh, there's rider X, that's a rather
dubious-looking bottle pass/caravan drafting move he pulling, but he
just had a flat, so we're not going to record that one"?

Quoted message said:

At the breakfast buffet I ran into [censored]. He wanted to let me know
that he had decided that I would be allowed to talk on the radio in
Chinese but if he heard me talk on the radio in English I would be
permanently out of the race.

Quoted message said:

Lots of crashes near the end of the stage which seems strange
because it isn't an especially dangerous stretch of road. Last year
saw a lot of crashes in the same place. It must be haunted or
something.

Riders at all levels need no reason to crash. I sometimes think that
obviously dangerous sections cause riders to compensate aggressively,
thus being less prone to crashing there, while the ordinary
"just-riding-along" parts of the course are where riders will be in
tight quarters, not worrying about falling down, and that's when two
guys in the middle of the pack hook bars and pull each other down.

Quoted message said:

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

There's a very well-defined UCI protocol for photographer positioning at
the finish line. Faint memory suggest it involves a diagonal line that
starts at least 15m from the finish, and photographers standing behind
that. It's likely the photographer was either illegally positioned, or
the rider just crashed into him regardless.

--
Ryan Cousineau [email hidden] http://www.wiredcola.com/
"My scenarios may give the impression I could be an excellent crook.
Not true - I am a talented lawyer." - Sandy in rec.bicycles.racing

Ryan Cousineau said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote:

These entries are great! But I am curious as to what (to the extent you
are willing to say) is the cause of the com-car omerta you describe. Is
it a case of conversations like "oh, there's rider X, that's a rather
dubious-looking bottle pass/caravan drafting move he pulling, but he
just had a flat, so we're not going to record that one"?

Some stuff probably skirts the line of what I can and cannot talk
about having happened.

Other stuff is probably right over the line into what I most
definitely cannot talk about.

Still other stuff, like the Com commenting on the waves and mentioning
that it looks like great weather for surfing followed by me
telephoning my friends who like to go surfing and giving them a brief
weather report are so far from the line that the only way people are
going to care is if it is or is not well written.

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about. I've already gotten yelled at by someone who isn't even
a com because he heard I had discussed the results with someone else
when the two of us had the results in front of us. And the specific
penalty in question wasn't even one that had been seen from the car I
was in.

When I've had enough experience to know exactly where the line is I'll
be willing to write about the safe stuff. Right now I'll be actively
silent. Especially since the most interesting parts of what happens
on the road tend to involve lots of radio chatter, lots of vehicles
changing position, and lots of taking notes.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

At the breakfast buffet I ran into [censored]. He wanted to let me know
that he had decided that I would be allowed to talk on the radio in
Chinese but if he heard me talk on the radio in English I would be
permanently out of the race.
Lots of crashes near the end of the stage which seems strange
because it isn't an especially dangerous stretch of road. Last year
saw a lot of crashes in the same place. It must be haunted or
something.

Riders at all levels need no reason to crash. I sometimes think that
obviously dangerous sections cause riders to compensate aggressively,
thus being less prone to crashing there, while the ordinary
"just-riding-along" parts of the course are where riders will be in
tight quarters, not worrying about falling down, and that's when two
guys in the middle of the pack hook bars and pull each other down.

Hmmm.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

There's a very well-defined UCI protocol for photographer positioning at
the finish line. Faint memory suggest it involves a diagonal line that
starts at least 15m from the finish, and photographers standing behind
that. It's likely the photographer was either illegally positioned, or
the rider just crashed into him regardless.

Whether or not it was bad riding or bad positioning it is bad news for
the photographer.

Not only was his telephoto lens damaged quite possibly beyond repair
he also got some bumps and bruises.
Not only was the Look carbon fork on the rider's bike completely
shattered the Look carbon frame was also cracked.
Not only was the bike destroyed the rider was also hurt bad enough to
leave the race.
Not only was the rider hurt the rider in question is also with the
National Team.

This photographer was with the Xinhua National News Agency Sports
Department.

Who wants to bet he isn't with them anymore?

-M

Ryan Cousineau said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote:

These entries are great! But I am curious as to what (to the extent you
are willing to say) is the cause of the com-car omerta you describe. Is
it a case of conversations like "oh, there's rider X, that's a rather
dubious-looking bottle pass/caravan drafting move he pulling, but he
just had a flat, so we're not going to record that one"?

Some stuff probably skirts the line of what I can and cannot talk
about having happened.

Other stuff is probably right over the line into what I most
definitely cannot talk about.

Still other stuff, like the Com commenting on the waves and mentioning
that it looks like great weather for surfing followed by me
telephoning my friends who like to go surfing and giving them a brief
weather report are so far from the line that the only way people are
going to care is if it is or is not well written.

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about. I've already gotten yelled at by someone who isn't even
a com because he heard I had discussed the results with someone else
when the two of us had the results in front of us. And the specific
penalty in question wasn't even one that had been seen from the car I
was in.

When I've had enough experience to know exactly where the line is I'll
be willing to write about the safe stuff. Right now I'll be actively
silent. Especially since the most interesting parts of what happens
on the road tend to involve lots of radio chatter, lots of vehicles
changing position, and lots of taking notes.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

At the breakfast buffet I ran into [censored]. He wanted to let me know
that he had decided that I would be allowed to talk on the radio in
Chinese but if he heard me talk on the radio in English I would be
permanently out of the race.
Lots of crashes near the end of the stage which seems strange
because it isn't an especially dangerous stretch of road. Last year
saw a lot of crashes in the same place. It must be haunted or
something.

Riders at all levels need no reason to crash. I sometimes think that
obviously dangerous sections cause riders to compensate aggressively,
thus being less prone to crashing there, while the ordinary
"just-riding-along" parts of the course are where riders will be in
tight quarters, not worrying about falling down, and that's when two
guys in the middle of the pack hook bars and pull each other down.

Hmmm.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

There's a very well-defined UCI protocol for photographer positioning at
the finish line. Faint memory suggest it involves a diagonal line that
starts at least 15m from the finish, and photographers standing behind
that. It's likely the photographer was either illegally positioned, or
the rider just crashed into him regardless.

Whether or not it was bad riding or bad positioning it is bad news for
the photographer.

Not only was his telephoto lens damaged quite possibly beyond repair
he also got some bumps and bruises.
Not only was the Look carbon fork on the rider's bike completely
shattered the Look carbon frame was also cracked.
Not only was the bike destroyed the rider was also hurt bad enough to
leave the race.
Not only was the rider hurt the rider in question is also with the
National Team.

This photographer was with the Xinhua National News Agency Sports
Department.

Who wants to bet he isn't with them anymore?

-M

The crowds at the start of Stage 4 were not small.

There was nothing about the crowds at the start of Stage 4 that would
make you describe them as small.

Unless, of course, you had seen the crowds during the intermediate
sprint at Dazhipo in Stage 3.

If you had seen the crowds during the intermediate sprint at Dazhipo
in Stage 3 or had any inkling what the crowds were going to be like
during the intermediate sprint at Jinjiang in Stage 4 then you would
describe the crowds at the start of Stage 4 as small.

But, in reality, they weren't really very small at all.

They just seemed small by comparison.

I've been told again and again (and again and again) by all sorts of
various people that the reason why the race uses the expressway in a
number of locations is because the condition of the pavement on the
national highway is unsuitable. Sufficiently unsuitable that nearly
300 kilometers of G223 have been ripped up all the way down to the
road bed for repaving just because of the race.

Now I'm not saying that repaving G223 isn't a good idea. I'm all in
favor of repaving the G223. I'm not especially fond of bumpy tarmac.
And as part of the repaving project they are also removing and
replacing a large number of narrow and/or dangerous bridges.

But...

There was a short stretch of about 10 kilometers where, for lack of a
better option, the race had to go on the G225. The 225 is even more
unsuitable than the 223 was before they removed the pavement. Where
the 223 was merely bump bump bumpety like Pooh Bear thump thump
thumping his way down the stairs the 225 is more like Tigger.

Since I was conveniently in an international commissaire's car at the
time I asked him about the poor road condition.
What poor road condition?
This poor road condition.
Where?
Here.
This was a bad road?
This was a really bad road.
Was I sure?
Yes.
This was not a bad road.
Yes it was a bad road.
No it wasn't.
Yes it was.
It most certainly was not a bad road and if the organizers really
thought this was a bad road they ought to take a look at some of the
roads they use in races in Europe.
(But it was a really bad road... really... everyone tells me so)

When I saw the crowds at the intermediate sprint in Jinjiang I thought
they were huge. This was before I saw the crowds the next day at the
intermediate sprint in Baisha. And this was without knowing that by
normal standards the crowd at the start line in Haikou had been really
quite exceptional.

Quoted message said:

From my trip to the Tour of Qinghai Lake and from various episodes

throughout the year of being stopped in the middle of the countryside
by people who wanted to know if I had anything to do with "the Bike
Race" I knew that despite the various organized activities including
marching bands, great masses of identically dressed schoolchildren
with flags, and sometimes big red festival drums (the kind that take
at least two people to beat) lining the route as far as five
kilometers back along the route before a town I knew that the vast
majority of the people were there not because someone told them to be
but because they wanted to be there and wanted to see what was going
on. I also knew that as soon as we flashed by and the police opened
traffic up again that it was all going to dissolve into one great
chaotic holiday for the crowd.

We were back on the expressway when we passed Lingao. Here the usual
crowds plus the usual group of dancers and usual group of musicians
was augmented by a less usual group of performers standing alongside
the road with two and three person operated Lingao Opera Puppets
waving at us.

I've never been to Lingao. I've not even really passed through it.
The 225 is to the south of the expressway and Lingao to the north and
for some reason or another I've never really felt the need to go on a
mission of bicycle exploration to that part of the island. So many
other places exist. Places that are conveniently situated between
here and there. Places where I know no matter how lost I let myself
get there will always be a way to find a bus back to Haikou or Sanya.
Lingao is not one of those places. And, even if it were one of those
places, it is highly unlikely that I would have stopped there for too
much longer than a cup of lemon ice, a sweet dimsum, and a hard boiled
egg or two. If it weren't for the bike race I never would have even
known that such a thing existed as Lingao Opera let alone two and
three person operated Lingao Opera Puppets.

For the most part, however, the expressway looked like an expressway.
Because of the way it carefully avoided anything troublesome like
towns, villages, hills, or scenery it was boring in the way that only
an expressway can be boring. I practiced taking acceptably readable
notes and tried really hard to catch what the Moto-Com said in Chinese
to the Radio Tour about the breakaways before he announced the same
information on the public channel in order and in English. It only
being my fourth ever time in a Com Car I think I did fairly alright
which is to say not too exceptionally terrible.

In Danzhou I met with my friends Joe and Anna for coffee and ended up
sitting with them in the secretariat until late chatting. Anna
pointed out, quite correctly, that perhaps one of the reasons why I
was having power politics problems with [censored] was because I was popular
in a way that he never could be. It wasn't just that I am foreign and
have useful skills. I'm also a girl. About ten years younger than
him. And working at a male dominated event. I suspect that he will
never ever get away with tickling a high level official.

Anna was really pleased with the race being in town since it meant
that she got to talk Russian with real Russians (and Georgians, and
Ukrainians, and even got to talk Kazakh with other people from
Kazakhstan). Joe not only thinks bike racing is cool but had the
chance to talk French with one of the guys from Italy.

Finally, at about 11pm I headed to my hotel by way of one of the other
staff hotels so I could pick up my luggage. It was quite well
furnished with two hand towels, two bath towels, two water glasses,
two tea mugs, two beds (each with two pillows), two wall lamps, two
floor lamps, two mahjongg tables, two condoms (at 2rmb apiece), two
soap dispensers, two chairs, and two windows. There was only one
public health pamphlet.

-M

The crowds at the start of Stage 4 were not small.

There was nothing about the crowds at the start of Stage 4 that would
make you describe them as small.

Unless, of course, you had seen the crowds during the intermediate
sprint at Dazhipo in Stage 3.

If you had seen the crowds during the intermediate sprint at Dazhipo
in Stage 3 or had any inkling what the crowds were going to be like
during the intermediate sprint at Jinjiang in Stage 4 then you would
describe the crowds at the start of Stage 4 as small.

But, in reality, they weren't really very small at all.

They just seemed small by comparison.

I've been told again and again (and again and again) by all sorts of
various people that the reason why the race uses the expressway in a
number of locations is because the condition of the pavement on the
national highway is unsuitable. Sufficiently unsuitable that nearly
300 kilometers of G223 have been ripped up all the way down to the
road bed for repaving just because of the race.

Now I'm not saying that repaving G223 isn't a good idea. I'm all in
favor of repaving the G223. I'm not especially fond of bumpy tarmac.
And as part of the repaving project they are also removing and
replacing a large number of narrow and/or dangerous bridges.

But...

There was a short stretch of about 10 kilometers where, for lack of a
better option, the race had to go on the G225. The 225 is even more
unsuitable than the 223 was before they removed the pavement. Where
the 223 was merely bump bump bumpety like Pooh Bear thump thump
thumping his way down the stairs the 225 is more like Tigger.

Since I was conveniently in an international commissaire's car at the
time I asked him about the poor road condition.
What poor road condition?
This poor road condition.
Where?
Here.
This was a bad road?
This was a really bad road.
Was I sure?
Yes.
This was not a bad road.
Yes it was a bad road.
No it wasn't.
Yes it was.
It most certainly was not a bad road and if the organizers really
thought this was a bad road they ought to take a look at some of the
roads they use in races in Europe.
(But it was a really bad road... really... everyone tells me so)

When I saw the crowds at the intermediate sprint in Jinjiang I thought
they were huge. This was before I saw the crowds the next day at the
intermediate sprint in Baisha. And this was without knowing that by
normal standards the crowd at the start line in Haikou had been really
quite exceptional.

Quoted message said:

From my trip to the Tour of Qinghai Lake and from various episodes

throughout the year of being stopped in the middle of the countryside
by people who wanted to know if I had anything to do with "the Bike
Race" I knew that despite the various organized activities including
marching bands, great masses of identically dressed schoolchildren
with flags, and sometimes big red festival drums (the kind that take
at least two people to beat) lining the route as far as five
kilometers back along the route before a town I knew that the vast
majority of the people were there not because someone told them to be
but because they wanted to be there and wanted to see what was going
on. I also knew that as soon as we flashed by and the police opened
traffic up again that it was all going to dissolve into one great
chaotic holiday for the crowd.

We were back on the expressway when we passed Lingao. Here the usual
crowds plus the usual group of dancers and usual group of musicians
was augmented by a less usual group of performers standing alongside
the road with two and three person operated Lingao Opera Puppets
waving at us.

I've never been to Lingao. I've not even really passed through it.
The 225 is to the south of the expressway and Lingao to the north and
for some reason or another I've never really felt the need to go on a
mission of bicycle exploration to that part of the island. So many
other places exist. Places that are conveniently situated between
here and there. Places where I know no matter how lost I let myself
get there will always be a way to find a bus back to Haikou or Sanya.
Lingao is not one of those places. And, even if it were one of those
places, it is highly unlikely that I would have stopped there for too
much longer than a cup of lemon ice, a sweet dimsum, and a hard boiled
egg or two. If it weren't for the bike race I never would have even
known that such a thing existed as Lingao Opera let alone two and
three person operated Lingao Opera Puppets.

For the most part, however, the expressway looked like an expressway.
Because of the way it carefully avoided anything troublesome like
towns, villages, hills, or scenery it was boring in the way that only
an expressway can be boring. I practiced taking acceptably readable
notes and tried really hard to catch what the Moto-Com said in Chinese
to the Radio Tour about the breakaways before he announced the same
information on the public channel in order and in English. It only
being my fourth ever time in a Com Car I think I did fairly alright
which is to say not too exceptionally terrible.

In Danzhou I met with my friends Joe and Anna for coffee and ended up
sitting with them in the secretariat until late chatting. Anna
pointed out, quite correctly, that perhaps one of the reasons why I
was having power politics problems with [censored] was because I was popular
in a way that he never could be. It wasn't just that I am foreign and
have useful skills. I'm also a girl. About ten years younger than
him. And working at a male dominated event. I suspect that he will
never ever get away with tickling a high level official.

Anna was really pleased with the race being in town since it meant
that she got to talk Russian with real Russians (and Georgians, and
Ukrainians, and even got to talk Kazakh with other people from
Kazakhstan). Joe not only thinks bike racing is cool but had the
chance to talk French with one of the guys from Italy.

Finally, at about 11pm I headed to my hotel by way of one of the other
staff hotels so I could pick up my luggage. It was quite well
furnished with two hand towels, two bath towels, two water glasses,
two tea mugs, two beds (each with two pillows), two wall lamps, two
floor lamps, two mahjongg tables, two condoms (at 2rmb apiece), two
soap dispensers, two chairs, and two windows. There was only one
public health pamphlet.

-M

Quoted message said:

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about.

Besides, you have to save something for the book 😉

--
Mike Kruger
Go ahead, threaten me like you have the American people for so long!
You're part of a dying breed, Hapsburg, like people who can name all
fifty states! The truth hurts, doesn't it, Hapsburg? Oh sure, maybe not
as much as landing on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts!
[Naked Gun 2-1/2]

Quoted message said:

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about.

Besides, you have to save something for the book 😉

--
Mike Kruger
Go ahead, threaten me like you have the American people for so long!
You're part of a dying breed, Hapsburg, like people who can name all
fifty states! The truth hurts, doesn't it, Hapsburg? Oh sure, maybe not
as much as landing on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts!
[Naked Gun 2-1/2]

Quoted message said:

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about.

Besides, you have to save something for the book 😉

--
Mike Kruger
Go ahead, threaten me like you have the American people for so long!
You're part of a dying breed, Hapsburg, like people who can name all
fifty states! The truth hurts, doesn't it, Hapsburg? Oh sure, maybe not
as much as landing on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts!
[Naked Gun 2-1/2]

In article <[email hidden]>,

Quoted post said:

Ryan Cousineau said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote:

These entries are great! But I am curious as to what (to the extent you
are willing to say) is the cause of the com-car omerta you describe. Is
it a case of conversations like "oh, there's rider X, that's a rather
dubious-looking bottle pass/caravan drafting move he pulling, but he
just had a flat, so we're not going to record that one"?

Quoted message said:

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about.

When I've had enough experience to know exactly where the line is I'll
be willing to write about the safe stuff. Right now I'll be actively
silent. Especially since the most interesting parts of what happens
on the road tend to involve lots of radio chatter, lots of vehicles
changing position, and lots of taking notes.

Fair enough. There's good reasons to not say what's going on during the
adjudication process of com incidents, or what happens as the coms
figure out what to do about a particular race-management issue.

Also, I once drove off-course multiple times while working in the
caravan of a road race. That sucked, and was seriously embarrassing.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

There's a very well-defined UCI protocol for photographer positioning at
the finish line. Faint memory suggest it involves a diagonal line that
starts at least 15m from the finish, and photographers standing behind
that. It's likely the photographer was either illegally positioned, or
the rider just crashed into him regardless.

Whether or not it was bad riding or bad positioning it is bad news for
the photographer.

Not only was his telephoto lens damaged quite possibly beyond repair
he also got some bumps and bruises.
Not only was the Look carbon fork on the rider's bike completely
shattered the Look carbon frame was also cracked.
Not only was the bike destroyed the rider was also hurt bad enough to
leave the race.
Not only was the rider hurt the rider in question is also with the
National Team.

Quoted message said:

This photographer was with the Xinhua National News Agency Sports
Department.

Interesting and complicated! It's quite possible that the expensive lens
was a pool-issued piece of equipment, so like the rider and his bicycle,
the photographer probably won't have to pay for it.

Quoted message said:

Who wants to bet he isn't with them anymore?

Well, some combo of the commis', the other photographers, and the video
replay will be able to determine who was in the wrong place. If the
rider just whacked into the photographer, force majeur is almost
certainly to be presumed, and there will be no material penalty to rider
or photographer. If the photographer was in a place where he was not
supposed to be, he's going to have a very bad time of it very soon.

There are gray areas, (photographer leaning in from the barricades: okay
in practice, unless the photographer gets in the way of the riders) but
the after-finish area is very well defined as to the places
photographers can be.

--
Ryan Cousineau [email hidden] http://www.wiredcola.com/
"My scenarios may give the impression I could be an excellent crook.
Not true - I am a talented lawyer." - Sandy in rec.bicycles.racing

In article <[email hidden]>,

Quoted post said:

Ryan Cousineau said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote:

These entries are great! But I am curious as to what (to the extent you
are willing to say) is the cause of the com-car omerta you describe. Is
it a case of conversations like "oh, there's rider X, that's a rather
dubious-looking bottle pass/caravan drafting move he pulling, but he
just had a flat, so we're not going to record that one"?

Quoted message said:

Having just earned myself the right to sit in a com car I'm not going
to jeopardize that right by trying to figure out what I can and cannot
write about.

When I've had enough experience to know exactly where the line is I'll
be willing to write about the safe stuff. Right now I'll be actively
silent. Especially since the most interesting parts of what happens
on the road tend to involve lots of radio chatter, lots of vehicles
changing position, and lots of taking notes.

Fair enough. There's good reasons to not say what's going on during the
adjudication process of com incidents, or what happens as the coms
figure out what to do about a particular race-management issue.

Also, I once drove off-course multiple times while working in the
caravan of a road race. That sucked, and was seriously embarrassing.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

The most serious crash almost certain was the one that came after
the finish line. It wasn't that the extent of damage was large.
However, only one photographer was hurt. If one cyclist and a bunch
of photographers were injured one could, perhaps, blame it on the
rider. When it is one cyclist and only one photographer one begins to
feel that the photographer doesn't have a very good chance of being
allowed to take pictures in Stage Four.

There's a very well-defined UCI protocol for photographer positioning at
the finish line. Faint memory suggest it involves a diagonal line that
starts at least 15m from the finish, and photographers standing behind
that. It's likely the photographer was either illegally positioned, or
the rider just crashed into him regardless.

Whether or not it was bad riding or bad positioning it is bad news for
the photographer.

Not only was his telephoto lens damaged quite possibly beyond repair
he also got some bumps and bruises.
Not only was the Look carbon fork on the rider's bike completely
shattered the Look carbon frame was also cracked.
Not only was the bike destroyed the rider was also hurt bad enough to
leave the race.
Not only was the rider hurt the rider in question is also with the
National Team.

Quoted message said:

This photographer was with the Xinhua National News Agency Sports
Department.

Interesting and complicated! It's quite possible that the expensive lens
was a pool-issued piece of equipment, so like the rider and his bicycle,
the photographer probably won't have to pay for it.

Quoted message said:

Who wants to bet he isn't with them anymore?

Well, some combo of the commis', the other photographers, and the video
replay will be able to determine who was in the wrong place. If the
rider just whacked into the photographer, force majeur is almost
certainly to be presumed, and there will be no material penalty to rider
or photographer. If the photographer was in a place where he was not
supposed to be, he's going to have a very bad time of it very soon.

There are gray areas, (photographer leaning in from the barricades: okay
in practice, unless the photographer gets in the way of the riders) but
the after-finish area is very well defined as to the places
photographers can be.

--
Ryan Cousineau [email hidden] http://www.wiredcola.com/
"My scenarios may give the impression I could be an excellent crook.
Not true - I am a talented lawyer." - Sandy in rec.bicycles.racing