Top ten ways to look like a better cyclist than you are! :)

[TrekDedicated]

Okay, I'm giving this a shot. I doubt mine will come even close to the ideas the rest of you have put up. THIS TOPIC IS SOOO AWESOME!

Style your hair to look like 'helmet head', if people ask, just say you you've ridden so much your hair grows that way..

I tried, probably failed making this funny..

 

[Salsa Rider]

Okay, I'm giving this a shot. I doubt mine will come even close to the ideas the rest of you have put up. THIS TOPIC IS SOOO AWESOME!

Style your hair to look like 'helmet head', if people ask, just say you you've ridden so much your hair grows that way..

I tried, probably failed making this funny..

you mean you all dont do that too????......

 

[birdman23]

Okay, I'm giving this a shot. I doubt mine will come even close to the ideas the rest of you have put up. THIS TOPIC IS SOOO AWESOME!

Style your hair to look like 'helmet head', if people ask, just say you you've ridden so much your hair grows that way..

I tried, probably failed making this funny..

Carry a load of wheels on your cars' roof and cover your car in Sponsor stickers. Always drink water out of a biddon.... even in restaurants.....

When out cycling.... stick fake bugs on your teeth and glasses and smile at the slow guys as you pass them....

sewing pockets into the back of your normal clothes and carrying around a Co2 pump and patch kit at all times...maybe even a powerbar or two...wouldnt want to EVER run out of fuel..

Ok this is it! Get a photo of yourself in a full TT suit, merge it with this photo and put it on your desk.

I came to work this morning with a **** poor attitude. I decided to hop on to my beloved www.cyclingforums.com and lo and behold this thread gets better and better! Thanks everyone for brightening my day. I have been grinning ear to ear since I got caught up on the thread. Hey Trek I thought yours was brilliant!

 

[birdman23]

Take this wonderful new product with you everywhere you go. Replace your chair at the office, sporting events, restaurants, etc. Tell people you just can't sit on anything else.

I will be taking custom orders. You specify your choice of saddles and choice of tripod material. Available in carbon, steel, aluminum, and titanium. Prices start at $5,000 US. A true bargain for a work of art like this.


Ha ha

 

[birdman23]

Brilliant...and just about matches my skill set!

Genius thread!

See how good this works Kate. This is the avatar of Cyclism by the way, a fellow forum member

 

[meehs]

Take this wonderful new product with you everywhere you go. Replace your chair at the office, sporting events, restaurants, etc. Tell people you just can't sit on anything else.

I will be taking custom orders. You specify your choice of saddles and choice of tripod material. Available in carbon, steel, aluminum, and titanium. Prices start at $5,000 US. A true bargain for a work of art like this.


Ha ha

Hmmmm... Looks comfy! That'd be a good way to break-in a Brooks!

 

[birdman23]

Hmmmm... Looks comfy! That'd be a good way to break-in a Brooks!

Very comfy, this is my personal Arione version, he he. So you wanna place an order for a Brooks version? Lol

 

[meehs]

Very comfy, this is my personal Arione version, he he. So you wanna place an order for a Brooks version? Lol

I appreciate the offer but at $5k I'd prefer to pick-up a custom Titanium Seven to break-in my Brooks. No offense, just personal preference.

 

[birdman23]

I appreciate the offer but at $5k I'd prefer to pick-up a custom Titanium Seven to break-in my Brooks. No offense, just personal preference.

You mean you think $5k is too much for a $100 saddle and $20 worth of aluminum tubes and misc. parts? Hmmm... I will have to rethink my pricing strategy. How about $4995.95

 

[jhuskey]

Take this wonderful new product with you everywhere you go. Replace your chair at the office, sporting events, restaurants, etc. Tell people you just can't sit on anything else.

I will be taking custom orders. You specify your choice of saddles and choice of tripod material. Available in carbon, steel, aluminum, and titanium. Prices start at $5,000 US. A true bargain for a work of art like this.


Ha ha

Office? I can hear the Workers Comp bad ergonomics (carpal tunnel) claims already. But I approve of the saddle.

 

[::dom::]

Office? I can hear the Workers Comp bad ergonomics (carpal tunnel) claims already. But I approve of the saddle.

You get CARPAL TUNNEL from your SADDLE???

Isn't that a different tunnel?

 

[jhuskey]

No just looking at the picture and trying to think what OSHA would think of it.
Just an occupational hazard of mine to rag on OSHA.
I just get a sores on my butt.

 

[davidbod]

OK I finally decided to read this thread and I've been laughing so hard my wife had to come over and check on me.

Here goes:

On your next group ride have a couple of buddies follow you in a car. At some point in the ride fake a flat raising your arm and looking back. Pull to the side of the road where your 'team car' will pull up along side. Then have the passenger jump out with a spare wheel, changing it in the blink of an eye followed by pushing you back up to speed. You can then toss one of your bottles so they can pull up beside you handing you another with the typical long handshake as they give you a push down the road.

This is great, keep em comming.

 

[cydewaze]

You can then toss one of your bottles so they can pull up beside you handing you another with the typical long handshake as they give you a push down the road.

I've done that before!!! (the bottle hand-off). It's great!

 

[Stevedvg]

You get CARPAL TUNNEL from your SADDLE???

Isn't that a different tunnel?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Damn I almost fell off my chair laughing!!! ...the guys in the office are looking at me weird!!

 

[jhuskey]

Strap a large salami to your leg (20inches or so) and then put on your Lycra shorts. (It won't work on the outside) .Then make comments how your performance drugs are having an unexpected side effect.And yes I know what you are thinking.Why such a small salami?

 

[TrekDedicated]

OK I finally decided to read this thread and I've been laughing so hard my wife had to come over and check on me.

Here goes:

On your next group ride have a couple of buddies follow you in a car. At some point in the ride fake a flat raising your arm and looking back. Pull to the side of the road where your 'team car' will pull up along side. Then have the passenger jump out with a spare wheel, changing it in the blink of an eye followed by pushing you back up to speed. You can then toss one of your bottles so they can pull up beside you handing you another with the typical long handshake as they give you a push down the road.

This is great, keep em comming.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Wow, my day has been made. (I'm going to do that one btw)

 

[Julian Radowsky]

Shave your head, don't put suntan lotion on top, get that wonderful helmet vent tan, tell everyone who asks that the suntan lotion only works for 2 hours of your six hour training rides.

 

[Salsa Rider]

Two words;

Quad Implants !!

 

[TrekDedicated]

Depending on wear you work, wear your cyling spandex under your suit/skirt. However, make sure your shirt is unbuttoned just enough to show your jersey. When you sit down, cross your legs, and show off your cycling socks with pride!

if someone asks about why your butt/crotch looks 'bigger' and suggests you are wearing Depends, you better say it's your chamois (sp?).